Grow Despite All Obstacles

On social media, we tend to see the victories, the accomplishments, and the wins of others. We see beautiful people and happy pictures of fancy vacations, cars, and dream homes. We rarely see failures, turmoil, struggles, and loss. It is important to know that no one has a perfect life or background and that there is a story behind every individual that generally stays hidden from the world. However, I believe that it is important to share aspects of your background, including losses and failures because it shows your human side to the world and makes you relatable to others. For these reasons I have decided to share my personal growth story with you in hopes that it inspires anyone reading this to realize that they are capable of anything, they set their mind to, regardless of where they are now or what circumstances they have faced in their life.

"The creator never singles out an individual for an important service for mankind without first testing him with struggle in proportion to the service he is to render." Napoleon Hill

As incredible as it sounds, I am the youngest of five children from a single mother. My parents divorced when I was 14 years old, just before I started my freshman year in High School. I have not seen or heard from my father since this time. The truth of the matter is that he was never in my life or the lives of any of my siblings. My father is an alcoholic and abusive person so not having a relationship with him is for the better. However, it still stings a bit, even after all these years. Growing up, I wondered why my friends had supportive and loving dads but I didn't. I would see my friend's dads play with them and be nurtured by them and it made me wonder why I wasn't lucky enough to have that. I would imagine what it would feel like to have the love and support of a father as a child and it would bring tears to my eyes every time. Since my father choose substance over family he rarely had a steady job or income, leaving my mother to find ways to earn additional income to support us. Watching this was difficult but it taught me valuable lessons on work ethic and hustle that I would have otherwise not have had. I remember my mom starting her own cleaning business when I was young to supplement income, this also led to her starting a catering business a few years later. On summer breaks and after school I would help my mom clean houses and when she started her catering business I would help her prepare ingredients and assist in cooking. These experiences while difficult helped shape me into the person I am today, and for that I am grateful. At a young age, I understood how to make money on my own and the value of independence. Not many elementary or middle school-aged students go to school all day and then go to work afterward cleaning houses or cooking. However, I did and the lessons I learned along the way helped mold my character and core values in remarkable ways. I am proud to say that I am the first person in my family to graduate from college and obtain advanced degrees which was not an easy task considering everything I was up against. During my college years, I worked full-time in addition to attending school full-time. I was able to graduate without any debt thanks to my work ethic and several scholarships that I was fortunate enough to receive, as a result, I was able to afford things I needed and wanted for the first time in my life. Without the formative entrepreneurial lessons I learned from watching my mother, I might not have been able to make a career as a business owner and be in the position I am in today.

Growing up I never had new clothes and lived on hand-me-downs until I was a teenager. Children in school would tease me and I was often bullied because of my family's financial status. I remember it being very difficult to fit in because the county I grew up in is one of the wealthiest county's in the United States and I stuck out like a sore thumb wearing old clothes and shoes. I had two close friends growing up who did not judge me and showed me genuine support and compassion. My best friend from the time I was in Kindergarten until I was in high school was named Kelly and she was truly a one-in-a-million person. She was unfortunately born with cystic fibrosis which is a serious medical condition resulting in build-up in her lungs and life-threatening infections. I remember her being in and out of the hospital and later as her disease progressed it became difficult for her to attend school. I remember helping her with her feeding tube when we would have sleepovers at her house and telling her all the juicy school gossip she was missing out on. I would pat her back and help her as she coughed and attempted to clear her lungs so she could breathe. As her condition progressed even further it became apparent that she was losing her battle. At the tender age of 16, she passed away. I remember it clearly, she and her family had recently gotten back from a Make-a-Wish trip to Florida where she got to swim with dolphins and have fun like a normal kid. Two weeks after the trip she died in the hospital from complications of the disease. She had never gotten to taste life and experience so many things we tend to take for granted. Attending her funeral was so profoundly sad, even though we all knew it could happen someday no one ever thinks of it happening to someone so young and innocent. I still think of her from time to time and reminisce about the fun times we had growing up. I truly don't know what I would have done without her love and support during my formative years, she showed me kindness when others looked the other way or bullied me. I will always be grateful for her and for the impact she had on my life. She taught me that kindness was the most important quality you can possess as a human being and how it can change the world. This is why I am so passionate about kindness and showing support to others. I remember what it felt like to be bullied and ignored by so many and how her acts of kindness toward me changed my life in truly transformational ways.

The lessons, experiences, and hardships we face in life are what make us who we are. They are our greatest teachers and because of this, they help us grow. It is important to note that we all have a choice to either stay the same and accept defeat or to become strong in the face of adversity and grow in incredible ways. No matter how difficult things may seem, look for the lessons and the opportunities for growth in everything. Life is not perfect for anyone and everyone has something in their past that is sad or difficult but we have the choice every day to progress and to use those difficulties as stepping stones to a better life and future. While my story was hard at times I wouldn't change anything about it because without these lessons I would not be who I am today. I went from a kid whom everyone picked on and no one believed in, to a successful business owner, public speaker, mentor, and coach. I am working on so many wonderful projects with highly successful people and every day new opportunities are presented to me. Thank you to everyone who has lifted me up and supported me in my life, your kindness will never be forgotten and I am more grateful than words can express. Please remember to always show kindness because you never know what someone has been through or is going through in their life. Small acts of kindness can change the trajectory of someone's life and make them into the person they are meant to be.

With love and gratitude, thank you all!

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