Groundie!

I’ve tried to write about coffee, but the words weren’t coming out as ants. They were stuck in my head. They didn’t want to be used to talk about coffee. Coffee isn’t for smaller words and my words that time were smaller. They had contracted as it was freezing. It was cold. I think my words at that moment were crafted to talk of something else. To just describe other things than coffee. And now, I decided to channel my words to a lady. To yell of what an irritation she had been when we shared air with her, in a matatu. She ground nuts in her mouth. Peanuts. And in as much as I love those pebbles, she made them look like stones.

 It was someday this week. Mist and fog played outside or were just about to start. In Kikuyu. A place where cold is literally belittled by residents. They work their ass off. Swim in cold and even busk in cold. The reason I said busk is because I saw men nearly thrice my age pose as they sat on rocks to manufacture stories. Stories about roads and maize, napier grass and cars, fire and grasshoppers e.t.c.. I bet they talked about farming. Or opening a company. I saw two that day. One of them held an aged panga,but I’d call it a knife. It had wet loam plastered around its edges. The other one behaved as if to look familiar. He just posed. You know. Just posed and nodded and admired the cold air pretending to laugh at his partner’s cold jokes. They ate stories. Cold stories. The day was just a good one and normal until came in a young lady.

I was heading to work and wondered why people work on cold days. But anyway, I found a good spot in a matatu and this young lady came and sat next to me. She wore wool on her head. A white weave. She was light and so the weave tried complimenting her looks. From afar that is. She looked fly though. But she acted like a gazelle. With half horns. A gazelle wearing wool on her head with half horns. She was cool. I didn’t mind. I was doing what many billionaires do. You know. Read. Angie Thomas with her flawless words on 'THE HATE YOU GIVE' novel. Yes I read novels as my side books. The main ones talk of food. Or anything edible. Like gazelles. But now, this lady that I’ll name “groundie”, as soon as the Mat started leaving, she fetched her purse and got those shiny oily nuts, wrapped in transparency. She bust the pack open and would see her enjoy the flavored air of her nuts. I didn’t mind too. May be the wool she wore made her crave nuts.

At the background run Easy Fm. Beyonce yelling “To the left to the left” and shouting all the way that she’s irreplaceable. I was all chilled. Yeah I get you Beyonce irreplaceable. But just as we got closer to Westlands, where another song played in the background, I think it was 'Impossible' by Shontelle, Groundie started chewing furiously. And I made a heavy turn that just seemed to call her. And the chewing got more louder. It sounded like Arabica coffee beans being grounded by friction. I swear it was irritating. Shontelle at that time said she hoped it was impossible. I felt like joining her and sing hoping groundie’s chewing was impossible too. The music was on low volume and Groundie’s chewing dominated. The Kange couldn’t talk. He was asleep. It’s as if he had foreshadow of Groudie’s chewing. All this time I dug the true meanings of 'Mvumilivu hula mbivu'. I am a man and who am I to get vent out my feelings for someone’s chewing?

Shontelle ended her song and now we got closer to University way. Groundie, did her thing’i and I couldn’t take it any longer. I was alighting there. University way. Where Nairobi university students kiss police’s asses through stones. And the police in turn kiss them back through gases. Tear gases. What boiled me down to even write this, is I elbowed Groundie as I tried to wake the Kange up. Here now, I didn’t know I had rattled a snake. Groundie with her peanuts and the nutty smell, turned on me. Calling me all sorts of shameless words. If I remember, she even called me the nuts themselves. I didn’t respond. The noise she made was enough to wake the kange up. He automatically made two hits at the matatu’s glass windows using a coin. And I did what I had to do. Alight calmy as Groudie still pukes words at me. My concern is why would you abuse the taste of peanuts through heavy chewing? Take it easy my man. No wonder I elbowed Groundie.