Grizzly's Laws Of Product Development

Grizzly's Laws Of Product Development

  1. The customers ... or the executives aren't watching until you make a mistake
  2. Interchangeable part's aren't
  3. The one item you need is always in short supply
  4. Things which must be shipped together ... aren't
  5. Things which must work together ... can't be carried to the field that way
  6. The important things are always simple ... the simple things are always hard.
  7. Always remember that your equipment was made by the lowest bidder
  8. If it's stupid and it works ... It ain't stupid
  9. The optimal number for a committee is exactly zero
  10. The only thing more costly than stretching a schedule is accelerating it
  11. Never argue with a fool ... people might not be able to tell the difference
  12. In case of doubt ... make it sound convincing
  13. Always carry a clipboard ... a checklist ... walk fast & look important
  14. Mechanical Engineers Motto: If it ain't broke ... take it apart and fix it
  15. If you fix something long enough ... eventually it'll stop working altogether
  16. When you run out of time ... beat to fit ... paint to match
  17. In order to get a loan ... you have to prove you don't need one
  18. The legibility of a copy is inversely proportional to it's importance
  19. Everything takes longer & costs more than you think it should ... or planned for
  20. Whenever you start doing something ... something else must be done first
  21. Every solution breeds new problems
  22. Nothing is ever as easy at it looks
  23. Things tend to get damaged in direct proportion to their value
  24. The first half of the schedule consumes 90 percent of the budget ... the second half ... the other 90 percent
  25. Any task can be completed in only 50 percent more time than it is currently scheduled for
  26. If you can afford to advertise you don't need to
  27. It costs a lot to build bad products
  28. By the time the people asking the questions are ready for the answers ... the people doing the work have lost track of the questions
  29. If you're not part of the solution ... there is good money to be made in prolonging the problem
  30. There are many highly successful companies ... there are also many highly paid executives ... the trick is not to mix the two
  31. The hidden flaw doesn't stay hidden for very long ... in the customers hands
  32. If everything is going well ... you have obviously over looked something
  33. Left to themselves .. things tend to go from bad to worse
  34. If there is a possibility of several things going wrong ... the one that will cause the most damage will be the first to go
  35. If anything can go wrong ... it will ... at the worst possible time ... usually when customers or executives are watching
  36. Teamwork is essential ... it gives the manager other people to yell at
  37. The first myth of management ... is that it exists
  38. Technology is dominated by those who manage what they don't understand
  39. Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself
  40. Everything is easy ... provided you don't understand it
  41. A short cut is the greatest distance between two points
  42. The cheapest option is always the most expensive in the long run
  43. Complex systems that do not work are usually found to have evolved from a simpler system that worked just fine
  44. If enough data is collected ... you can prove anything
  45. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it
  46. The perfect man for the job will show up the day after the job has been filled
  47. Software is like entropy ... difficult to grasp ... weighs nothing & obeys the 2nd law of thermodynamics ... it always increases
  48. The weaker the data .. the greater the precision quoted to give the data authenticity
  49. If you can't dazzle em with brilliance ... baffle em with bullsh*t
  50. 90 percent of the time things turn out worse than you expected ... the other 10 percent of the time you had no right to expect so much
  51. The more one produces the less one gets
  52. Simple systems aren't feasible ... because they require infinite testing
  53. Hardware works best when it matters the least
  54. One should expect that the expected can be prevented ... but the unexpected should have been expected
  55. The more time you spend talking about what you have been doing ... the less time you have to spend doing what you have been talking about. Eventually you spend more & more time talking about less and less until finally you spend all of your time talking about nothing
  56. An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less until he knows absolutely everything about nothing
  57. We never have time to do it right ... but we always have time to do it over .... and over ... and over ... and over ...
  58. There is no such thing as a perfect plan
  59. No plan ever survives initial contact with reality ... or the customer ... whichever comes first
  60. Professionals are predictable ... the world is full of dangerous amateurs
  61. For every action ... there is an equal & opposite criticism
  62. Whenever you have excess time & money ... you can't do anything wrong. If you are short on time & money you can't do anything right
  63. The customer never knows what they want ... but they always know what they don't want
  64. The most complex job will be assigned to the least experienced person
  65. There is always a way ... and it usually doesn't work
  66. The most dangerous thing in the world ... a fresh graduate with a schedule & a budget
  67. Never tell your boss you have nothing to do
  68. If you ever hear the phrase ... "Don't worry, I learned this in school" RUN!
  69. Everything you packed for the field is everything you don't need ... everything you need is back at the office
  70. Definition of a committee ... a group of the unwilling, picked from the unfit, to do the unnecessary 
  71. Intellectuals solve problems .. geniuses prevent them in the first place
  72. The scariest phrase in the English language ... "We're from the government ... we're here to help"


Michaela Katzschke

Supplier Management MTU

5 年

Dilbert :-)

David Paddon

Owner at Gwood Asia - Group Operations

5 年

all my staff are automatons, so speed and efficiency go hand in hand

Mark Godwin

Engineering Manager | Specialty and Defense

5 年

Number 10 is the biggest understatement I have ever seen

Andrea Botturi

Business Director - IEN Member

5 年

Shortly....

  • 该图片无替代文字
Timothy Leeds

Fractional Marketing Executive | Helping Businesses Scale with Data-Driven GTM, Business Intelligence, Growth Strategies, CRO, and Sales-Marketing Alignment

5 年

I'm still laughing, crying, shaking my head and giving you a thumbs up for this article.? Great post.

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