Greenhouse Gags
Shawn Oueinsteen
![Shawn Oueinsteen]()
Shawn Oueinsteen
Novelist & Wordslinger battling global warming. See shawnoueinsteen.com
As global warming can have such dire consequences, we need humor to deal with it. So here are a few dumb jokes.
- What’s the next creature to go extinct? Snowmen.
- The industry of the future for the next remake of The Graduate? Air conditioning.
- Look at the good side, Greenland’s finally going to be green.
- The romance between the planets Mars and Venus is in trouble. Their neighbor, Earth, is getting really hot. Earth’s changing albedo is affecting Mars’s libido. Astronomers have determined that something on Mars is rising and it’s not the sea level.
- Maybe we’ll get to see what penguins wear under their tuxedos; they’ll have to take them off in the heat.
- LSD guru Timothy Leary is smiling in his grave. Even the oceans are doing acid.
- Calving glaciers are affecting the ocean food chain. The great white whale today is eating ice burgers.
- To stop greenhouse gas, we need to put up a sign: no farting in the arboretum.
- Skinny dippers can now swim in the Arctic. They call themselves polar bares.
- There’s talk of covering the Antarctic, during the midnight-sun summer, with a new photovoltaic film to provide electricity. They’re calling that South polar solar.
- In the Garden of Eden, Adam’s Internal Combustion Engine (ICE) car is melting. God’s replacing it with an electric vehicle (EV).
- Have you heard about the Trump-brand fortune cookie? The message always reads, “Climate change really is a Chinese hoax.”
- What wind farm sets the record for the least amount of power? The Senate Democratic Caucus.
I am writing a powerful global warming novel as part of my personal war against the climate crisis. Please help. Friend me on Facebook, Follow me on Twitter, and connect with me on LinkedIn. I need a great publishing company to market the noverl and print a lot of copies. Publishers look at an author's social media numbers as a sign of potential buyers. So please Friend me, Follow me, and Connect with me, and comment on what I post. Consider it as doing a small part in saving humanity from the ravages of global warming. Thanks.
Shawn Oueinteen
https://www.shawnoueinsteen.com
Executive Director, Leaders in Energy | Building a community of leaders to advance clean energy & sustainable solutions
5 年Shawn,? Thanks for sharing these jokes.? ?I am tagging others who also enjoy a good sense of humor in our Leaders in Energy community which connects people to help accelerate and scale clean energy and sustainable solutions.? Maybe some of these jokes will start showing up on the Bill Maher Show!? ?Your novel sounds quite interesting.? ?I will also reach out to connect on LinkedIn.? ?John Gaffigan? Beth Offenbacker, PhD, CPCC?Carole Douglis?Miriam Aczel?Kyle Saukas
Owner at Hendren Law and White River Magnetics
5 年I’m a fan. Thank you. I’ll do what i can. I’m running for President. Reverse global warming by using solar and wind power to extract and compress atmospheric nitrogen to a liquid and direct it back on the melt water to refreeze it. The American Garden Party. We have to hurry. There is a tipping point. I am a writer myself and perhaps we can collaborate. ?