Great Relationships II

I continue today talking about relationships and sharing a few more POI’s (Persons of Interests). I find that few connections we make on social media go very far. Many are willing to connect when requested but a significant small number respond when you reach out to them and thank them or ask a question on which to base additional conversation. What is this all about? Bragging rights? The number of connections you have. Ya, I’ll brag that I have over 4,000 connections on LinkedIn, but what does this mean?

Great relationships depend upon a level of emotional investment on the part of both parties. Most we connect with on platforms such as Facebook, Twitter, X, or LinkedIn do not desire these levels of commitment. What most people want is just to be “socially wired” according to many researchers. It is, as Professor Bu Zhong, associate professor of communications at Penn State?University, reports, “the desire to form and maintain interpersonal attachments — the need to belong — is a fundamental human motivation.”?

The difference in relationships, truly connecting with someone, is based upon the desire to go beyond the “protection” of the social media and to meet physically or through something like a blog post. There are exceptions I have found, but the simple question or comment concerning meeting in person is often a defining point. A simple cup of coffee, a mutually agreed upon time to meet in a convenient location, is all it usually takes. There is no question that most people are extremely busy; I find myself too often being overwhelmed, even in so-called retirement, by too much to do. Meeting in person is a commitment involving both time and vulnerability.

If someone responds to my follow up message or reaches out to me in response to a connection, we often seek out some common ground or like interest that ends with “we should meet for coffee or lunch!” This is where I have had the privilege and great honor of meeting some incredible people.

People like Ed Hanko, a Business Development & Commercial Roofing Consultant with Moser Roofing Solutions. I was most impressed with Ed’s social media posts, their frequency and the way he integrates story telling into a message about the product he represents. But there is much more to Ed to discover. He was a police detective for 21 years, he founded and managed a school, had a successful real estate business, and took on doing other tough things like a million push-ups, and running quarter marathons. He moved to the Lancaster Area with his family about a year ago with no job and no connections. This is a fascinating story on its own.

Chuck Hawkins and I met sometime back on like but did not really connect until sometime more recently when we both attended the same workshop and found that we had several similar characteristics that we explored over lunch a few weeks later. He is an IT geek with a particular passion for helping seniors better understand technology. He is currently trying to build this love into a business. This is one smart man! I totally admit that I know enough in this field to be dangerous. He makes it all sound very simple.

My last example for this article is Rich Moorhead. He is an individual that surprised me a great deal by his response to my follow-up. He indicated that he “was just going to thank you for the connection and would love to meet up when it suits. I'd love to hear more about TRUTH.” His profile indicated that he was …” Keynote Speaker I Artist I Author of Forth Coming Book” and I will admit that I was a little a little intimidated, but I took a chance. What a truly incredible story he had to tell, and what an exceptional guy. Briefly, he was an office furniture salesman who was getting burned out and was looking for a new direction in his life. He thought it might be, of all things, starting a skate shop in Hanover, Pa. In the process of checking out the possibility he discovered a large supply of old and broken skateboards.

The artist in him saw the potential of repurposing these boards into a decorative product of interior design and he ended up founding a company to produce these decorative tiles. At one point he had over 100 employees. His board forced him out of his company – something right out of TV, and he started writing a book about his experiences. I don’t want to spoil the rest of his story that will be found in his book to be published soon, but I will tell you that it will be worth the read.

Take a chance. Put yourself out there and see what happens. Not every connection will become a relationship. You may even fail, but the risk is worth it. Just remember, be genuine, be honest, and be yourself. I would love to connect with you and perhaps we will find a common area.