THE GRASS ISN'T ALWAYS GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE - THE OTHER SIDE OF MOVING COUNTRIES

Moving either from one town to another or moving countries is not for the faint hearted!?

One always has this vision of the grass being greener on the other side but mostly that’s not true.?Unlike most South Africans I moved to the USA not because I didn’t like the country I was living in, nor was afraid of the crime statistics, but because I felt the need for an adventure.

I love South Africa and always will, however I had been married to the same man for over 50 years, worked in the same job for 45 years, my children had grown up and didn’t need me anymore, I had got my MBA and what was next, well an adventure into the unknown.

I had always loved the USA and thought it would be fun to move here – which it is, and then the reality sets in.

We had left not only our family but all our friends behind and like the old Dolly Parton song goes, “You Can’t Make Old Friends”.?We thought we would be fine as we did have friends in the USA, and no one is from Florida anyway. Everyone has come here from somewhere else, but nothing prepared us for the size of this country, its HUGE and there are so many people, everywhere. Also you think the people will be like you and your friends – they aren’t – and the worst thing is they all have a history, they like to meet people from the town they grew up in, the school they went to, the university, that’s a big one- that they went to or aspired to go to and they have a lot in common. You and they have very little in common. Just finding the local plumber, electrician, pharmacy, doctor, dentist and most importantly a decent hairdresser poses huge challenges and a lot of trial and error.

While we all speak English everyone has a major problem understanding our accent and, unlike Charlize Theron, I was determined to preserve my accent and not put on a pseudo-American twang, little did I realise how they would struggle to understand me. A simple thing like asking for ice with my cold drink, the waitress thought I was saying “arse.”

Then there is the tipping, oh my goodness it’s never ending, you are almost forced to valet park your car when you go out. That’s a $5 tip which doesn’t sound much but its R100 and another $5 or R100 when he brings it back.?That’s R200 onto your meal before you have had a bite. Some Restaurants have 20%, 25%, and 30% options for their tips.? And if you don’t tip, they actually ask and don’t dare leave the usual 10% else they ask what they did wrong.

You are expected to give a tip for everything, in fact we went to buy an ice cream from the store up the road and the server refused to give us an ice cream unless we gave a 18%, 20%, or 25% tip to him for just taking a scoop and handing it over!

You would think there wouldn’t be anything like the Dept of Home Affairs over here, but the government departments are almost as bad, you have to make your appointment online and then get in the queue and the queues are long and you have gun toting security guards keeping you in line.

Allans connotation between South Africa and the USA is as follows:

“South Africa is a place where nothing works but you can get everything to work your way, and the USA is a place where everything works but nothing works your way!”

If you had to ask me the biggest difference, is here, they really don’t understand the words “make a plan.”

For us it’s the most natural thing in the world to “make a plan” but here they are so governed by all the rules and regulations that they only know how to do things by the book and no one but no one ever makes plan – if you ask them to, they say, “what do you mean?” And that’s really hard to explain.

Part of the adventure was to start a new career, so I decided to become a realtor, I went to school, wrote the exam, passed and then had to write the state exam which I did and passed that too. Now I thought I could start my own business, I was wrong. I have to work for a boss for two years and then write my brokers exam before I can start my own company. So here I am aged 74 working for a boss who is 27 years old, a self-made millionaire in dollars, who expects me to know everything he does and more and be as quick as he is on the phone, computer, app and every other gadget and sell houses as well.

I am the only one who doesn’t permanently walk around with EarPods in my ears, and neither am I covered in tattoos, and I still don’t speak any Spanish – that’s my next challenge. Spanish – not the tattoos.

People ask me what I miss about South Africa, I really miss my domestic workers and value them so much more than I ever did, and I also miss Woolworths. In a country this big you would think that they have something similar to Woolworths, well you are wrong, there is nothing even remotely like it here. South Africa is streets ahead when it comes to supermarkets and the crazy thing is we copied the Americans but just did a much better job!

I ?keep explaining to the locals, that Africa is a continent and not a country, that we are really civilised and ?wild animals do not roam in the streets, however, ?I encourage everyone to come and visit SA, as without doubt, South Africa is the best country in the world and we are the most resilient, courageous and amazing people you will ever meet, anywhere.

?Much Love,

Margaret Hirsch