Got to or Get to? It's all a matter of perspective

Have you ever noticed how, when things get stressful or overwhelming, the words we use can lean towards the negative? Phrases like “I have to,” “I need to,” or “I must” often slip into our vocabulary, subtly reminding us of obligation. They emphasise tasks as burdens or duties, and these words have a sneaky way of reinforcing that sense of pressure.

I remember during my coaching training, a fellow participant made a powerful observation about this. They pointed out how language like “I have to” focuses on what we feel forced to do, turning tasks into weighty obligations. Our lead facilitator expanded on this, explaining how these phrases impact our mindset, shaping how we approach situations and the results we achieve.

That’s why, when I catch myself falling into this pattern, or when my team kindly points it out, I remind myself of the power words hold. And then I shift to one of my favourite techniques: the "Got to - Get to" approach.

And so, this week, I thought I’d share a bit more about the “Got to - Get to” approach and the benefits of applying it.

What is the “Got to - Get to” approach?

At its core, it’s a simple but powerful mind-shift technique. You change your perspective from what you have to do, to what you get to do.

Here’s how it works and the benefits it brings:

Embracing "Get to":

By shifting your language from "I've got to" to "I get to," you recognise the freedom and privilege in making choices. Tasks and responsibilities become opportunities rather than burdens. For example, saying, "I get to go to work" reframes employment as a privilege, highlighting the chance to contribute and grow.

The Power of Perspective:

This shift transforms mundane tasks into meaningful experiences. Viewing your obligations as opportunities fosters empowerment and gratitude, making you approach challenges with greater enthusiasm and curiosity.

Promotes Gratitude:

Adopting a "get to" mentality cultivates gratitude by shifting your focus from what you lack to what you already have. This not only enhances emotional well-being but also promotes resilience and strengthens relationships.

Encourages Ownership and Empowerment:

Seeing tasks as opportunities encourages you to take ownership of your life. You’re reminded that you're an active participant, not a passive recipient of circumstance. This fuels motivation, creativity, and personal growth.

This mindset shift is not only a powerful tool for yourself, but it’s also great for those you lead, parent, or influence. Helping others move from a place of overwhelm or negativity to a more empowered and positive mindset can make a significant difference in how they approach life’s challenges.

My favourite question to ask is, “I wonder if we flipped this from got to, to get to, how that might help some more?”

Trust this has been helpful in some way shape or form!

Kylie Paatsch Leadership Coach, Consultant, and Facilitator, passionate about unlocking the potential in leaders, teams, and organisations. Through personalised one-on-one coaching and interactive workshops—both in person and online—I offer simple, practical, and personally tested tools and techniques to help you lead with confidence and build a strong team culture.

If you are interested to learn more about what I do and how I might be able to help, please send me a direct message or email [email protected]