GOODER

Like you, I attend many meetings.  I sit in conference rooms.  I attend conference calls.  I use Skype and Hangouts.  There are many very nice collaboration tools that make getting together very easy.

When attending these meetings, I like to listen more than talk.  In spite of people who know me who will point out that i'm "chatty", I enjoy listening to every word spoken.  I also enjoy looking at the person talking.  I refuse to stare at a Powerpoint while someone reads to me.  I also think it's rude to have a laptop open under the guise of multi-tasking, but that's another topic.

What has SNL-like comedic value are some of the phrases and words that I hear.  Many people like to speak as subject matter experts with impactful phrases, but can really miss the mark.  You were invited to the discussion for your input.  Don't muck it up by talking larger than you need to.

Here are some of my favorite observations:

Ending a sentence with the word "so".  In my opinion merely using a period does a good job of ending a sentence.  "We'll get people together and fix this......so".

360 vs. 180.  "We're going to do a 360, and get this project back on track".  A 360 is a complete spin with you ending up right where you started.  I think you were looking to do a 180!

Yeah, no cannot be the beginning of a sentence.  It seems like people use this to either relate to a comment or rapidly change the subject.  Person A - "I had to work all weekend on this problem".  Person B - "Yeah, no we had a family dinner this weekend".  

Per se does not help you look competent unless you back it up with On obtiendra le travail fait.  "We won't change the release of SQL, per se".   Huh?

"We need to un-thaw this situation".  Un-thaw, Really?  I have a grille in my backyard that will un-thaw raw meat.

"I could care less".  Very impactful and very rude in a group of people.  It's also very incorrect.  I couldn't care less would have been the "golf club used for that shot".

"I'm just being honest".  So, you're telling us that you've been lying up until this moment?

....and my favorite

"Can I ask a quick question".  It will not be a "quick" question, and chances are you're in the process of talking to someone about something else.  Quick question is code for "I don't have time to wait for you to finish.  What I have to say is more important.  Stop what you're doing and pay attention to me".

I won't pretend to convince you that my oratory skills are impeccable and beyond reproach ( I had to look all that up ).  I personally believe that "gooder" should become an acceptable word approved by Websters.  I've misused e.g. vs. i.e. my entire professional life.  I have issues as we all do.

I'd love to hear from you on some of your favorite discussion blunders.

J