Goodbye Good Girl Biz Tips #15 - Can Corporate Communication Bear Honesty?

How committed are you to being your true self? I ask because if you are completely committed, any costs you have to pay for being real will be worth it to you. If you are not, this one can be rough, tough, and a tumble for even the roughest rider.

The honesty is challenging enough but more so the fallout. How many people want to hear the truth? How many managers have you had with whom you felt safe enough to be utterly real?

The Core of the Problem

I know that people leave jobs because of bad managers. But bad managers aren't the absolute core of the problem. The prize for that one falls to the system itself. There is no way to feel safe to be one's own true self in a system that has punishment from above built in.

You could use the wrong word one morning - or your manager could be touchy about how strong you are and feel threatened - and boom! You are out of a job.

That is no way to create an environment of trust, sharing, and honesty. But that is what business needs absolutely.

Why is honesty so important in a company, anyway?

I know this so well at this point, I find it difficult to believe that so many businesses do not. The best way to uplevel your business is to (1) focus on your people first - not the bottom line, and (2) look - from your peoples' perspectives - at what is wrong in the business personally as well as professionally.

Basically, you have two choices as a business owner: you can either pretend everything is great and do endless patch-up work, or you can remain agile, authentic and open to course corrections.

One keeps you and your people frustrated and losing any sense of interest in what is done day after day. The other keeps you on your toes, fascinated, and constantly in modes of creativity and personal agency!

That's business honesty. And it's absolute lifeblood. So I don't for the life of me know why businesses don't commit to that first and foremost!

What about interpersonal honesty?

Get to know one another - share your perspectives and your feelings - and suddenly you get to speak from a deeper place, a place of deeper mutual understanding and tolerance.

See, emotion is the one "language" we all speak. We all know what "fear" feels like. We all knows what "frustration" feels like. And so forth. But we won't speak the damn language! What a disappointment!

So, when you wander into a work situation in which you wish to be real, honest and authentic with someone, you may be the only person in the room who wants that.

Then again, everyone might. But who is going to be the courageous one to speak up?

If you want to grow as a human being, and be true to yourself, YOU will.

If you want to limit yourself to keeping your job by not speaking up, you WON'T.

Is this easy? Well, I'm not talking about the kind of emotional outburst in which one carries on and yells to get one's way. I'm talking about deep interpersonal honesty and the taking of responsibility for one's feelings. So, no, that's not easy, particularly in an environment in which you have no guideposts to tell you, "It's safe here."

But you can certainly prove yourself to yourself by taking your courage in your two hands and starting a conversation with, "This might not be a popular way to approach this, but I thought I might share a different feeling and perspective I have about this situation, and we could discuss it. What do you think?"

We understand the need for security - very well. But do we understand as well how deep is our need to be ourselves? And how deep is our need to be ourselves...together?

Watch this.

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Lori E. Kirstein is a Communication Coach and Public Speaker. You can schedule a time with her here: https://tidycal.com/goodbyegoodgirlproject/30-minute-communication-exploration-with-lori-e-kirstein