A good question a day keeps the dogma away

A story about Confucius is told:??“When the Master entered the Great Ancestral Temple, he asked questions about everything taking place. Someone critiqued, “Who said that this fellow from Zou village understands ritual processes? When he enters the hall, he asks questions about everything!” When the critique was reported to Confucius, he said, “That, too, is ritual conduct.” (Analects 3:15)

We, who equate certainty with power, can learn a lot from this story. Confucius defaults with both humility and confidence into a mode of inquiry. He does so in order to gain insight, demonstrate respect, and show care for both person and ritual. For Confucius, developing curiosity is at the heart of authentically embodying ritual action.

The organizational psychologist Edgar Schein had a similar concept of questioning which he called Humble Inquiry:?“The Skill and the art of drawing someone out, of asking questions to which you do not already know the answer, of building a relationship based on curiosity and interest in the other person.”

Notice that Schein says Humble Inquiry is not only about getting information and attaining insight but also about cultivating relationships. This is because by asking authentic questions I put myself in a position of situational and temporary dependency thereby empowering my interlocutor. I give her my attention, trust, and respect. The social dimension of this type of curiosity is something that Confucius would very much appreciate.

Sometimes even when you think you know something, defaulting into a mode of curiosity is of great value. Doing so allows you to draw out wisdom from others, to get a different perspective on a problem, to help people to think more clearly.

Great teachers have utilized the power of questions for ages. In the American Masters documentary on Itzhak Perlman (2018), the acclaimed violinist spoke about his most influential teacher -- Ms. Dorothy Delay - as follows:

“I hated her. I hated her. I hated her because she was so different than my first teacher. My first teacher just told me everything. “You do this.” “You aren’t doing that.” Then comes Ms. DeLay. ‘Sugarplum, what do you think of that?’ ‘What do you think of this?’ What do you mean what do I think!?! I don’t think! You tell me what to do and I’ll do it. Don’t tell me I have to think. If she knew something was out of tune she would say, ‘Sugarplum, what’s your concept of a G sharp?’ What the hell do you mean my concept? But it’s very interesting that while I hated the way she taught, now that’s the way I teach.”

Of course it’s not just teachers that employ the power of questions. In many different fields we see that turning questions into a habit pays great dividends. Research shows that top-rated managers ask more questions than average ones. That excellent negotiators spend 21.3% of their communication asking questions (twice as much as their less effective counterparts). That the most?successful sales reps ask?between 11–14 questions per sales call, while average ask 7–10, and below average 1–6 questions.

In the sciences, Jonas Salk, who developed vaccine for polio, once observed that, “What people think of as the moment of discovery is really the discovery of the question.” And Albert Einstein famously said that if he had to solve a problem in an hour, and (to be a little dramatic) his life depended on it, he would spend the first 50 minutes making sure he is asking the right questions before attempting to solve.

Thinking in questions is also the way in which we cultivate excellence.?

In his book The Mamba Mentality (2018), the late great Kobe Bryant explains that throughout his career he was relentless with questions.

It turns out that Confucius was onto something when he implored us to make a habit out of our curiosity. Next time, before you default into giving advice, answers, or directions, remember the great teacher and ask at least one good question.