"Good." A Proven Strategy for Dealing with Setbacks and Failures
Jason Kunz
Husband | Speaker | Founder | Committed to Enhancing the Health of the Global Workforce
Based on the current state of things, this is a special installment in a twelve-part series on the future of the Safety and Health (S&H) profession, and the Safety and Health professional. Insights are based on one of the largest and most comprehensive ongoing qualitative research projects on leadership in the safety and health field. Review?part one here, part two here, part three here,?part four here, part five here, part six here, part seven here.
"Let others praise ancient times; I am glad I was born in these." ~Ovid
May you live in interesting times is an English expression claimed to be a translation of a traditional Chinese curse. While seemingly a blessing, the expression is normally used ironically; life is better in "uninteresting times" of peace and tranquility than in "interesting" ones, which are usually times of trouble. I call BS.
Expecting, or wishing for peace and tranquility, for "uninteresting times" is a lot like running east and hoping for a sunset. It's never going to happen, and you'll consistently find yourself in a state of suffering, attempting to control that which you cannot. As Epictetus writes,
"If a person shifts their focus to their own reasoned choice, they will gain the will to overcome, but if they shift their focus away from their own reasoned choice to things not under their control, to what is controlled by others, they will then be agitated, fearful, and unstable."
Epictetus is reminding us that peace and tranquility are results of our choices and judgement, not our environment. We control our reasoned choice and all acts that depend on that moral will. What's not under our control is...well, in a word everything outside our reasoned choice. A wise person recognizes what's inside their circle of influence and what is outside of it, accepting that we can't control the wind, but we can adjust our sails. They understand, we are disturbed not by things, but by the view which we take of them.
We live in far too dynamic of a world for the times to ever be "uninteresting." Now, as much as ever this cliché rings true.
We suffer not when things don't go our way, we suffer when we have an expectation of how things should be, and they're not.
Those who have endured, who have discovered ways to thrive during this time are no different from you and I. I promise you they aren't aware of some mythical, metaphysical formula known only to the chosen few. No, they simply traded expectation for commitment early on. They chose to honor the struggle instead of avoiding it. They didn't ask, "why is this happening?" They inquired of themselves, "Who do I need to be?" In doing so, identifying and separating matters of uncontrollable externals from those of choices that are solely, and will continue to be their own.
If you've been living on, or anywhere near planet earth the past few years, you've had a few things that didn't go your way. For me, the setbacks seemed unbearable at times. From navigating the pandemic as a newlywed in a 400 square foot, street level downtown Minneapolis studio apartment, to multiple burglaries during the tempestuous summer of 2020 just feet outside our doorstep as my wife, Malia slept next to me, to being booted from a charity I just so happened to cofound almost a decade ago.
The intent of today's article is not to give you "3 Strategies for Avoiding Setbacks and Failures." Good luck with that. But instead, to give you one of the only strategies needed to learn to accept setbacks and failures; whether you're a safety and health professional, or someone simply seeking a few moments of "peace."
Enter Jocko
Jocko Willink is a retired U.S. Navy SEAL officer, co-author of the #1 New York Times bestseller Extreme Ownership: How U.S. Navy SEALs Lead and Win, Dichotomy of Leadership, host of the top-rated Jocko Podcast, and co-founder of Echelon Front. Jocko spent 20 years in the SEAL Teams, starting as an enlisted SEAL and rising through the ranks to become a SEAL officer. As commander of SEAL Team Three’s Task Unit Bruiser during the battle of Ramadi, he orchestrated SEAL operations that helped the “Ready First” Brigade of the U.S. Army’s First Armored Division bring stability to the violent, war-torn city.?Task Unit Bruiser became the most highly decorated Special Operations Unit of the Iraq War.
Jocko returned from Iraq to serve as Officer-in-Charge of training for all West Coast SEAL Teams. There, he spearheaded the development of leadership training and personally instructed and mentored the next generation of SEAL leaders. Jocko is the recipient of the Silver Star, the Bronze Star, and numerous other personal and unit awards. Upon retiring from the Navy, he co-founded Echelon Front, where he teaches the leadership principles he learned on the battlefield to help others lead and win.
If there's someone qualified to advise others on how to effectively deal with setbacks, failures, delays, defeat, or other disasters, Jocko would be towards the top of that list. So, although Jocko isn't part of the official research cohort (yet), he brings invaluable perspective that's as needed as ever.
With each cancelled event, stayed or upheld federal mandate, conflicting study, "quick and devastating take down" of those with varying opinions from our government's "leaders," or feeble attempt by the media to spread fear and outrage, one thing remains unscathed, our reasoned choice to rise above. The ability, no matter the circumstance to respond calmly and with quiet confidence, "Good."
"Good" by Jocko Willink
"How do you deal with setbacks, failures, delays, defeat, or other disasters?
I actually have a fairly simple way of dealing with these situations. There is ONE word to deal with all those situations and that is: “good.” This is something that one of my direct subordinates, one of the guys who worked for me, a guy who became one of my best friends, pointed out.
He would call me up or pull me aside with some major problem or some issue that was going on, and he’d say, “Boss, we got this, that, or the other thing going wrong,” and I would look at him and I’d say, “Good.”
And finally, one day, he was telling me about some situation that was going off the rails, and as soon as he got done explaining it to me, he said, “I already know what you’re going to say.” And I asked, “What am I going to say?”
He said, “You’re going to say: ‘Good.’” He continued, “that’s what you always say. When something is wrong or going bad, you just look at me and say, ‘Good.’”
And I said, “Well, I mean it. Because that is how I operate.” So I explained to him that when things are going bad, there’s going to be some good that will come from it.
That’s it. When things are going bad don’t get all bummed out, all startled and frustrated. No, just look at the situation and say: “Good." Now. I don’t mean to say something clichéd. I’m not trying to sound like Mr. Smiley Positive Guy. That person ignores the hard truth. That person thinks a positive attitude will solve problems. It won’t.
But neither will dwelling on the problem. No. Accept reality, but focus on the solution.
Take that issue, take that setback, take that problem, and turn it into something good. Go forward. And, if you are part of a team, that attitude will spread throughout.
Finally, if you can say the word, “good,” guess what? It means you’re still alive. It means you’re still breathing. And if you’re still breathing, that means you’ve got some fight left in you. So get up, dust off, reload, recalibrate, re-engage, and go out on the attack."
And that, right there, is about as good as it gets.
"Good" for the Safety and Health Professional of 2022
How can you individually and the profession collectively deploy "Good?" Great (good) question. In order to gather a diverse perspective and remove some of my personal biases, I leaned on a few of my favorite safety and health aficionados for their perspectives on "Good." See below for how they personally deploy this strategy. Please comment with yours. Events are neutral, our opinion of those events and how we choose to respond to them is anything but. "Failure" is nothing but feedback.
The Good Ol' Days Are Always Behind Us
The next time you experience setback, failure, delay or defeat ask, "What's inside my circle of control?" "What is not?" Remind yourself you cannot possibly expect to control the external events that happen around you, but you absolutely can control your opinion about those events. Take the setback, failure, delay, or defeat and turn it into something good.
Make time to identify what is deserving of your attention, the things that matter, married with the things you can control. Then choose to focus there.
"The single most important thing is differentiating between what we can change and what we cannot. What we have influence over and what we do not. A flight is delayed because of weather - no amount of yelling at an airline representative will end a storm. No amount of wishing will make you taller or shorter or born in a different era. The same is true for today. If we can focus on making clear what parts of our day are within our control and what parts are not, what truly matters and what does not, we will not only be more fulfilled, we will have a distinct advantage over other people who fail to realize they are fighting an unwinnable battle." ~Ryan Holiday
"Good" allows us to generate calm amidst the chaos, move from pain to perspective amidst the realization of another failure or setback, and operate with a posture of poise. It forces us to grow, to take responsibility for our interpretations, actions, and results. "Good" empowers us to control our focus, our mental and emotional "state", the quality of our day. Providing you, and nothing outside of you the power of choice.
The highest performing safety and health professionals rise above that which they cannot control. They are ruthless to the things that don't matter. They don't dwell on the problem, but accept reality, then focus on the solution. They take responsibility, knowing both the problem and solution starts with them. They willingly take on the greatest challenges within their organizations, and across the profession. They create professional communities, then share their lessons with those communities. They trade expectation for commitment, recognizing, then embracing that the work is never done.
To that, I say, "Good." May we continue to live in "interesting" times. Let others praise ancient times; I am glad I was born in these. Character, like a photograph, develops in the darkness. Amor Fati...
With over a decade of experience with the 3M company in a variety of technical and leadership roles, Jason Kunz demonstrates his passion for the safety and health profession across multiple platforms. A forward-thinker, with the objective to elevate the health and well-being of all workers, Jason uses his voice to amplify the profession and the professional. His life journey, blessings, and struggles have inspired a commitment to building professional communities that ensure an empowerment of their people. Jason is a husband, co-founder, speaker, coach, and community advocate. He's a CIH and CSP, but mostly grateful to have a J-O-B and work with some of the most passionate and compassionate people on the planet.?Married since 2019, Jason and his wife Malia call Minneapolis home.
Results-driven coach for C-level executives to enhance their mental resilience and to improve their results | founder of One Minute Coaching and developer of the Resilience Quoti?nt Test | Motivational speaker
1 年Thanks Jason, for sharing this beautiful article. You're absolutely right about the way we humans have to deal with setbacks. And I like the word 'good' as a first reaction. The word “good” as an initial reaction is powerful—it triggers our cognitive processes and steers us toward constructive thinking. I like to add that for a lot of people fear of failing is the main reason why people refuse to take personal responsibility for their own situation. So, they blame, regret, get angry instead of taking their responsibility once exposed to a setback. Good luck with your endeavours to coach and guide people with your philosophy, Victor
Director of EHS at CHS
3 年Positivity always wins and makes people more comfortable to tell the real story to leaders than always susgar coating things. Well written Jason
Transforming Safety Ecosystems
3 年This is such an incredible article. You provide a reason “why” people should implement a practice to reframe. That reframe builds resilience, autonomy over your life, and ultimately a practice to live life more fully. The work to live life more fully is continuous practice. We need all of the tools we can get to employ for every situation. Thank you for bringing this tool to life.
Infrastructure Division Deputy Manager
3 年And some say it's too hard or expensive to incorporate changes into your life that actually work. The simple act of smiling can make goodness role off your tongue. Jason Kunz striking the power of optimism, yet again.
Head of Global EH&S, Plasma and Biolife Operating Units
3 年This, my friend, is very “good”!