GOOD LUCK TO THE EMMY NOMINEES FROM THE POODLES OF PARK AVENUE BY KAREN-CHERIE COGANE!

The 72nd prime time Emmy Awards will be virtual this year on September 20 at 8 p.m. ET on ABC TV. Jimmy Kimmel will be the host, and Simone, the Park Avenue poodle, and her family are having a small soiree.

FAST FORWARD TO 9/20: “It’s Simone, and I’m excited, since my parents and me are having an Emmy Awards shindig for some of our human pals and their pooches! Ricardo, my dashing poodle beau, who lives with me, is here with Jorge, his person and our in-house gourmet chef, as is Frank, my dog walker, who speaks poodle and Chihuahua.

The people will wear masks and social distance. It’s okay, since we have a very large living room with a really big TV. I just want everyone who has the corona virus to be well again, and safe, and for this terrible virus to go away.

Canine invited guests who live in my building: Lexi, my BFF, who’s an English Sheepdog; Charmaine, the girl Bichon, and as I mentioned before, Ricardo, my black poodle love.

Another dog who is not actually invited, but coming: Mojito, my Chihuahua walking partner. Frank has to bring him, since his people, both MDs, are on call.

But the nutty Mojito has been warned by Frank to be on his best behavior or else he will be put in another room, away from the guests. Why? Mojito has tantrums when he doesn’t get his way, and he’ll want to make a play for Lexi, the cute furry Sheepdog, his newest crush.

It’s a broken record, but our dog walker told Mojito just to say ‘hi’ to Lexi, and he responded: ‘But I want to romance her, and tonight, will be the perfect night!’

Frank picked Mojito up and said: ‘Don’t you dare or beware!’

Mojito jumped out of Frank’s arms, yapped, and turned in circles: ‘What are you going to do to me if I don’t listen? Huh?’

Frank: ‘Mojito! S-T-O-P right now, and I mean it! Watch out!’

Mojito: ‘Why?’

‘Because I said so!’ Frank said sternly, ‘If you want to stay at this party, be quiet, or else I’ll put you in a back room, away from everyone!’

‘But . . . but . . . but!’ Mojito yells.

Frank’s retort: ‘There are no buts, Mojito! Either you act like a good dog, or you’ll be put in a room far away from the soiree! Understand?’

So, Mojito gave in and said “Okay, I’ll behave.’

But will the Chihuahua cooperate, or won’t he? Probably won’t, but there will be consequences. I mean, Mojito is not going to ruin my party.

Frank told me he put lavender in Mojito’s water to calm him, and even brought a tranquilizer if the Chihuahua has a meltdown, and one other thing to do the trick.

Due to the corona virus there is no live show, but we got decked out, anyway. I suspect that many people will watch the Emmy Awards in jammies, but not my family and me.

My pompoms and my hair are fully fluffed, and on the top of my head, I have high hair that is fanned out. FYI, my super stylist, Lilly from Ma Belle Chien on the Upper East Side, made a doggie house call to wash, style and blow dry my hair. She’s extraordinaire! And she threw in a massage and a paw rub!

My great mom, Grace, even put a red runner, a rug that resembles the Hollywood Red Carpet in our living room. I will prance on it with my mommy, and make my grand entrance when people arrive.

Grace dazzles in an emerald green organza evening gown by a famous Italian designer. On her tootsies are silk high heels in the hue of green. Her golden blonde hair is in a half upsweep to reveal her emerald dangling earrings and a matching emerald necklace and bracelet. Are they real? Bien sur!

Wearing a French gardenia perfume is Grace, and oh, how the beautiful scent permeates our rooms.

Raymond is decked out in a black silk tux, white shirt, black bow tie, and shiny black shoes.

Oh, my goodness, does my dog walker look dapper! Frank wears a tux that is black silk and is dressed a lot like pop. The handsome duo could almost be twins, except dad is a little taller.

There’s no actual paparazzi this year, but daddy will take pics of me on our red carpet!

I imagine that I’ve been nominated in four categories, for Best Dog Actor, Best Dog Dancer, etc.

I wish Entertainment Tonight’s Kevin Frazier could be here and come over to me, after I’m flocked by the LA paparazzi: ‘Simone, you’re a showstopper! WHO ARE YOU WEARING?’

As I would do a 360 turn, Frank would translate: ‘Bonjour, Kevin, and merci! I’m wearing my favorite French designer, Jacques Seine!’

Ricardo would be asked the same question, and Frank would reply: ‘Thank you. Leonardo Romani!’

‘You are Hollywood’s IT dog couple! And Raymond and Grace, you both look very elegant, as do you, Frank!’ Kevin would exclaim.

Then I picture our whole clan being escorted into the spacious Microsoft Theater in Los Angeles for the Emmy Awards.

Now, back to our new reality. I know the invitees, both human and canine, will fuss over me at our Park Avenue party.

I can’t complain, since the very gifted Jorge, has made a lavish spread. There’s an array of tuna and avocado sushi, salmon sashimi, scallops with truffles, vegetable dumplings, steak tartare, and caviar hors d’oeuvres.

The doggies will have special canapes of duck, salmon, or bacon, or roasted chicken. I want all of them!

Then we’ll have a pre-show sit down dinner at our dining room table. Sirloin steak is on the menu, watermelon salad with feta, potatoes au gratin, asparagus, a medley of Fall veggies, home-baked bread, and mini lobster rolls.

The people will be at one table, and the dogs will be at another. Jorge will feed us.

Canine menu: Steak, pumpkin puree and assorted vegetables suitable for doggies.

For dessert Jorge made a gorgeous vanilla Emmy statue shaped cake, encrusted in gold ganache frosting. Hope I can taste it!

Pooch-friendly cupcakes made with peanut butter and pretty looking gold cookies, flavored with cinnamon and ginger, are on platters.

I’ll throw caution to the wind and indulge. All my walks will work off any incurring little bulge.

Jorge will do the honors of serving wine and champagne. Our usual bartender, Dexter, couldn’t make the party, so Jorge offered to pitch in. It’s a win-win!

My parents will make a champagne toast to me, since I’m, like, the Number One poodle!

Don’t tell, but I’m definitely taking champagne sips. You know what, though? I bet mommy gives it to me. If I get a little tipsy, yippee!

Before the guests arrive at our apartment, I continue to daydream about my many primetime Emmy wins. But rest assured, someday I will win an Emmy, and hopefully, a lot of awards.

Fast forward to the winner announcements in the pooch categories, and I’ll summarize. I win four awards! And they are:

1. ‘Best Performance by a Dog in a Leading Role in a TV Series about Dogs.’ I played Penelope, the confused poodle who lives in Manhattan in ‘The Pampered Canines.’

2. ‘Best Performance by a Dog in a Leading Role in a Variety Special.’ I danced on ‘So You Think You Can Prance?’ and did a ballet inspired piece to Tchaikovsky’s ‘Sleeping Beauty.’ I performed the difficult and beautiful ‘Blue Bird’ variation. The choreography was adjusted for a poodle, and I wore a sparkling blue tutu.

3. ‘Best Performance by a Dog in a Guest Starring Role in a TV Series.’ I portrayed Beaucoup, the misunderstood and spoiled poodle, who lives in Greenwich, CT in ‘Love the Pets.’

4. ‘Best Performance by a Dog in a Reality Show.’ I performed a lively jazz dance to music from ‘Fame’ on ‘Dancing with the Dogs.’ I danced to the title song: ‘Fame.’ It’s appropriate, isn’t it? Grace studied advanced ballet and jazz dance with a famous dancer, and performed in a ballet company, and taught it to me. On-set trainers coached me, so I would give a magnifique performance, and I guess it worked!

'And the winner is Simone Margery!' says Jimmy Kimmel, the charming virtual host, who appears to hand me my Emmy statues. I imagine that I knew about my wins beforehand, so there would be replicas of Emmy statues with my name on them in our apartment.

Actually, there are many Emmy award statues that are fake (but they look real) that my mother ordered online for our bash. It creates an award show ambiance. They are scattered throughout our living room and dining room.

Mom would hold each Emmy up for me, and Jorge would build a pedestal that we can stand on, as I envision it. I do my poodle prance, and happy dance, as my parents, Ricardo, and Frank join me.

I graciously accept, courtesy of Frank. My first speech: ‘Thank you to my wonderful pet parents, Raymond and Grace, to my sweet boyfriend, Ricardo, and to my devoted dog walker, me, I mean, Frank. I love you so much and could not have done it without you! Thank you to Jorge, Ricardo’s person and our great chef; to Lilly, my talented stylist who made a house call; to Francine, my sweet nanny who plays Tchaikovsky for me; and to Alfred Meyer, my terrific agent. And thank you to my wonderful and loyal fans. Oui! Merci beaucoup! Au revoir!’

I imagine that at a live Emmy Awards show, the other pooch nominees are jealous and bark: ‘Simone wins every award! Every single one! It’s just not fair! Not at all! Poodle this and poodle that. Give another dog a chance. Come on! She’s not the only canine actor! What about us?’

I think: ‘Yes, but I’m the best one! Get over it! And I’m on a roll!’

Jimmy Kimmel would scold: ‘Calm down now, everyone, and behave! We’re on TV. Simone is the winner, so be gracious dogs, and congratulate her.’

There you have it. I would have four Emmy Awards! It’s a clean sweep! As I see it, I would win in every category I am nominated!

‘You’re the Meryl Streep of dog actresses!’ Ricardo would exclaim.

My answer: ‘Yes, I am, and thank you!’

FYI, it’s obvious that so many humans would congratulate me, and the other dog nominees, would swallow their pride, and shake my paw.

I picture that that when we return to our hotel suite, we take a relaxing swim in the pool. Ricardo and I do a mean doggie paddle. After we ease our tired muscles in the hot tub. I get many pets and paw rubs from my parents and the piece de resistance -- romantic kisses from Ricardo. Then we all conk out, including Frank, who is in the adjoining room.

The next day as we promenade through Beverly Hills, I would paw scribble/sign autographs, we would sightsee in LA, and drive to Malibu. We’d hit the beaches and do a quick swim in Venice and Malibu. Yahoo! Even if I just get my paws wet, it would be fun.

I’d fit in perfectly on Rodeo Drive with all the posh LA poodles and people. Maybe Raymond will buy a mansion for us, and then Ricardo and me can be the Beverly Pood-hills!

I can see us gazing at the Pacific Ocean and strolling on the shore. Ricardo would stop, and we would smooch. Eating at outdoor cafes in Santa Monica would be the best part. A terrific time would be had by everyone. I could dig this year-round sunny weather.

Mom and pop would buy Hollywood-themed souvenirs, like an Academy Award trophy for me. And why not? I can win an Oscar. Maybe I’ll even get a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame! Je suis Simone, THE Park Avenue poodle!

So, next year, I hope we are back to normal and have a live Emmy Awards show, and that we have Emmy Awards for dogs. Then I can really win. First, I have to get the canine roles, though, which should be a piece of cake for me.

In real time, our red runner is put out on the floor, and it looks striking, just like a Red Carpet, only a little smaller.

The guests are arriving, and their attires are lovely. The dogs are not in costume but are coiffed. It’s no surprise that Lexi still has her long, brushed fur in her eyes. That’s why she’s so vulnerable to Mojito, and he knows it. But the Chihuahua is being watched.

Mom is signaling for me to come, so I can officially make my entrance with her. Even though everyone knows me (I mean, who wouldn’t?), it feels so nice to be honored for my mere presence.

Frank has Mojito on a leash, and in his other hand, he has a lavender filled water bottle. Frank tells Mojito to drink some, and he agrees. Little does the Chihuahua know, it’s to keep him relaxed.

Mojito says hi to me. Then he gets emotional and gets on his small hind legs, when he spots Lexi with her pet mom on the other side of the living room.

Frank takes Mojito’s paw and waves it to Lexi, and they sit on a chair, so Mojito can keep his distance from the Sheepdog. Frank whispers to me that he has some relaxing CBD doggie biscuits, made from hemp in his bag in case (or when) Mojito acts up.

Frank: ‘Here, Mojito, try this. It’s tasty.’

‘What is it?’ Mojito asks.

Our dog walker: ‘A new biscuit. Come on, you’ll like it.’

The Chihuahua: ‘Oh, okay.’ He eats one biscuit, and Frank gives him too more. ‘These are good, really good.’

After a few minutes, Mojito is very zen and says to me, ‘You look so pretty, Simone.’

‘What did you say? Did I hear a compliment?’ I ask him.

Mojito smiles and replies: ‘Yes, I told you that you look very pretty,’ and then he dozes off.

Frank carries him back over to the chair and sits with Mojito on his lap, for the time being.

Frank says to me: ‘Good, it worked.’

My reply: ‘CBD? That’s news to me. But anything to calm that crazy Chihuahua down.’

Then Grace summons me over to the red runner, and the rest of my small audience is standing and social distancing. They are thrilled to watch me parade, award style. It’s not quantity, it’s quality.

Ricardo gave me a big kiss and said he’s so proud of me.

Then Jorge will pass out the hors d’oeuvres and afterwards, the dinner! Ricardo’s human always outdoes himself. Too bad there are no single ladies here this year. I love to see them fawn over the suave Jorge. When our English butler, Ardsley, is here, he gets very jealous of the attention Jorge gets from women. But it’s not Jorge’s fault that he is irresistible.

I can’t wait to see the awards show! Got to go! Our bash is starting, and I have to make my grand entrance! I’ll strut my stuff with all my fluff!

Above all, bonne chance to all the very talented Emmy nominees -- actors, writers, directors, choreographers, etc. at the virtual show!

And bravo in advance to the Emmy Award winners! May the best dog, I mean humans, win!"

Written by: Simone, THE Park Avenue poodle, helped by Karen-Cherie Cogane