The ‘Good Black’: The ‘Black Tax’ that we all pay….

Part 5 in a Series: My Realities of Race

Recently, I’ve been approached by so many well-meaning folks – many if not most white – who’ve responded to several of my recent pieces published via this medium that have dealt with the specter of race in our society. In hopes to educate, elevate and engage ever more people of goodwill in the fight for equality and justice for all in our society, I’ve crafted a five-part series of articles – of which this is the fifth and final one – detailing my personal experiences as a Black man in modern America. I believe that my experience of race is representative and not unique, and I share it with the intent of helping others understand the differences in our experience and how these help explain the civil unrest we’re experiencing at this time. I don’t claim to have all the answers, but I have lived most of the questions and it’s in this spirit that I offer my perspectives.…

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OK, so by now, if you’ve read any of the preceding pieces in this series, you’ve figured out who I am, the type of Professional of Color whom, as the end of the last century approached, we’d describe as “the Good Black.” As far as you can tell, other than the color of my skin, I’m pretty much like you and therefore not as frightening as those other ones.…

This was brought home to me in an ostensibly humorous way some years ago when, while discussing some social issue with my assistant at the time, who was white, she responded to my assertion that, as with most African-Americans, race was a real challenge in my life, both personally and professionally. She didn’t believe that it could limit my career at our company, even though I challenged her to look at the even more senior executives than myself and find anybody who looked like me or, perhaps more to the point, who looked different in any way. When she conceded this point, she did so by trying to lighten the mood by saying, “That’s not right: you shouldn’t be held back just because you’re Black. And, let’s face it, you’re not really Black: you’re the one who belongs to all the country clubs, so, really, you’re whiter than me.”

Yes, we had a nice laugh because, on one level, what she said was true: for an African-American, both in her experience and in American society at large, I was quite unique. But if you reflect more carefully on her statement, there’s an inherent hierarchy exposed within it: essentially, she suggested, because I was not that Black and, in fact, was indistinguishable from white folks, my race shouldn’t impede my professional ambitions (or, conceptually, personal ones, either). Though I’ve never aspired to it nor believed it justified, her observation reveals an enduring truth: in the hierarchy of race in America, and especially in corporate America, being Black is an impediment and thus lesser than being white.…

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To conclude this series, the theme of which has been the largely unseen and unappreciated burdens that race imposes in our society, I want you to think seriously about how you would answer this question: if, admittedly, relative to the African-American community as a whole, or, for that matter, American society, I’ve lived a truly blessed life, but race has asserted itself constantly and virtually always in a negative way, what do you think the cost of this veritable ‘Black Tax’ is to the average member of my community or any community of The Other?

To make it plain, I’m one of the fortunate ones and I’ve almost been killed by police and have routinely been diminished and demeaned because of my race, so what do you think the experience of everyday Black folk is like? This is why we seem so angry so consistently.…

Again, to keep it 100%, answer this: would any of this blessedly powerful, just, inclusive and now international protest be going on were George Floyd’s murder not captured on video for all the world to see? In other words, take a moment to reflect on the fact that for decades and, in fact, centuries, we have been brutalized and/or killed without consequence, including by agents of the state, and our cries have largely gone unheard and unaddressed. But for video now, what would our reality still be?

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In other recent pieces published via this medium, I noted that there are plenty of folks who consider themselves to be of goodwill but have a hard time embracing the reality of their Privilege. Essentially, the argument runs, that since they’re not personally racist (even though studies show that we’re all bigoted in some ways, either consciously or not) they can’t be Privileged. You know, I’ve worked hard to get to where I’ve gotten and therefore deserve the fruits of my labors and my success.

I get it and I dispute none of that, except … it’s a profoundly ahistorical. And it’s based on a false premise, that the playing field on which you’ve excelled has been a level one. Just because you’re not aware of the additional and typically substantial burdens that difference places on others with whom you’ve competed doesn’t mean that you’ve not benefited from the Privilege of not being constrained in these ways.

To make it plain – and, truly, I don’t mean to be offensive – but when you survey the upper echelons of American business, and even the society as a whole, you’ll notice that it’s disproportionately white and male. Conceptually, this could just be the result of the fact that white people – and especially white men – are naturally more talented than the rest of God’s children and so this reflects an unfortunate reality of the meritocratic system in our society.

Or, perhaps, that’s b.s. and, in truth, due to the benefits of exclusion our lily-white, mostly male leadership class is essentially the modern version of the pre-integration NBA.

You remember, don’t you? Back three generations ago when black folks weren’t allowed to play in the league? Was that solely because the whites at the time were better at the game?

And, of course, no rational person would try to make the argument that the quality of play then could even be compared to that of the present time now that the league is fully integrated and includes the best talent, whether it’s of Color or international.

What do you think the business world and our society would be like if we truly opened its leadership to the most talented among us?

And before we rush out and let a few more fortunate Others into the executive class, let’s remember to avoid such tokenism and to acknowledge the true goal: to engage successfully in the holistic practice of Diversity, Equity, Inclusion & Belonging such that anyone is able to rise to the level of his or her talent unconstrained by Difference … including the white males who continue to be the default choice in our society today.

To put a finer point on it, as a wise business elder once shared with me, we’ll know we’ve achieved this worthy and ultimate goal not when we have a few rightly celebrated breakthroughs – like, say, electing an African-American president – but when the average (or even mediocre) Person or Color or woman or member of the LGBTQ+ community or Muslim or immigrant or… has access to the same opportunities and is able to achieve as much as the average (or even mediocre) white male. Alternatively stated, the business world isn’t any more post-racial – or, more broadly conceived, post-Diversity – because a few exceptional African-Americans or women have become CEOs any more than our country has proven post-racial for having elected President Obama twice.…

But far more important and far-reaching than progress at the top, it’s crucial that we remember that we must apply this test to the average/everyday person. Yes, Black folks and Others whom you know who’re attempting to navigate the upper echelons of our society face meaningful difference-based challenges, but this pales by comparison to the fresh hell that is the experience of race and Difference for everyday folk. The latter is our proper (though by no means exclusive) focus.

Another thing you may not know about African-Americans of a certain generation, especially those Baby Boomers who were the first to experience meaningful access to the American mainstream, is that though the world may perceive us as exceptional individuals, another less public though no less important responsibility attaches to our success: we Trailblazers of Difference are compelled to pay forward our success by throwing open the doors of opportunity ever wider in our wake. Yes, we’re still the modern-day ‘Race Men’ (and women) of our communities.

If you know any successful, say, African-Americans, ask them about this and you’ll find that while they’re committed to their own personal success, they’re well aware of their collective responsibility to leverage this to affect the uplift of the community as a whole. So, in addition to being ambassadors for the race to our white colleagues and friends, we’re also rightfully called to be trailblazers and access providers/enhancers for our fellows.

This dual responsibility – to self and to community – is another aspect of the Black Tax – or, more broadly, the ‘Diversity Tax’ – that those of us who’re different have to pay. Now don’t get me wrong: there are a number of us who’ve ‘made it’ and not seemed to reach back and help others do so, but, for the vast majority of successful Others I’ve known, they’re clear on and feel ennobled by this responsibility of uplift.

Of course, we'd very much appreciate more help from our white colleagues, which is really what the sustained push for Diversity, Equity, Inclusion & Belonging is all about.…

Finally, as I draw this series to a close, I feel compelled to share some very personal reflections on race, both as I’ve lived it and as a problematic concept in our society and world.

Another reason that my former assistant’s comment that I was whiter than her was funny is that, because I’m so fair-skinned and she’s olive-skinned, it’s debatable who the lighter – and thus whiter – of us is, visually speaking, at least. In fact, depending upon how I comport myself, many times my race has been unclear to those around me. It’s funny, but both black folks and white folks have sometimes not realized that I’m one of them.

Wait, what? That’s right, it turns out that I’m adopted and that even though my parents – a brown-skinned African-American male and a very fair-skinned African-American female – look like they could’ve had a fair-skinned son liked me biologically, such was not the case. Though the adoption records are sealed, and out of respect for and fealty to my parents I’ve never sought to have them opened, the story that I was told was that I’m the product of a union of mixed races.

So, in all likelihood, biologically, I’m both Black and white … which, in America, means Black. And I’m not only 100% totally cool with this but thankful for it: for far greater than its burden is the blessing of being associated with the profoundly rich and noble history of a people brought to these shores in chains who’ve fought valiantly for centuries, mostly successfully, to have their humanity fully recognized and respected. I'm both proud and humbled to be Black, but I just wish, as all of us who are different do, that this was as appreciated and celebrated as it should be in our society and world.

No, being Black doesn’t make me better than anybody else; it just makes me different. And I’m proud of this Difference: it’s an important part of who I am. And in living into this uniqueness fully, it’s incumbent upon me to appreciate and celebrate your uniqueness, too. This is what the true spirit and practice of Diversity & Inclusion are all about.…

This being said, I’m mindful of an entrenched and dominant reality that remains to be ameliorated in our society: because of the powerful salience of race and gender, for many of its greatest beneficiaries, the white males who’re disproportionately represented in our leadership, the successful practice of Diversity & Inclusion can feel like a threat. When you’ve been used to eating the whole pie, having to share it can feel like a loss, even when you should’ve been sharing it all along.

And yet, this perception of loss is itself ahistorical and based on a false premise: rather than acknowledging the centuries of undeserved benefits from Privilege, it focuses on the perception of a sort of zero-sum reduction when having to share opportunities and accolades proportionally. In other words, rather than being thankful for having benefited from an unlevel playing field for centuries, too many white males are bemoaning becoming more subject to fairness and true competition (largely in private, of course).

Which is why it’s so important that more white men become allies in and sponsors of the successful practice of Diversity & Inclusion. Simply put, it’s easy to claim to support this commitment to equity and justice, but the historical record is both contrasting and quite clear: far too many of those in power today, who’re disproportionately white and male, profess a commitment that does not show itself in outcomes.

The reality is that, both for our society and for corporate America, Diversity & Inclusion are ‘Nice To Do’s’ but not ‘Must Do’s,’ which means both that Privilege is perpetuated along with the underperformance that the research shows attaches itself to homogeneity. Yes, it turns out that there is an even cruel irony to the ‘Black Tax’ or ‘Other Tax’: not only are you excluded because you’re different, but this exclusion results in a lesser outcome for all involved, which is truly a lose-lose result.

So, essentially what we’re asking for is for the true embrace of the meritocratic ideal: diverse and inclusive environments lead to higher performance, which means that the successful practice of Diversity & Inclusion will make for a better society as well as a more productive business sector, which benefits us all. To make it plain: as the economist Heather McGhee has demonstrated, -isms like racism and sexism and other forms of exclusion cost all of us something and, of course, these costs are disproportionately visited upon the excluded.

In sum, let’s get rid of racism and the other -isms that continue to plague our society so that we can all experience the ‘Diversity Dividend’ that will result.

Of course, I want this for myself and for my children and grandchildren, but, truthfully, I want it even more for those who’ve paid an even greater price for being different in our society and world. Yes, the experiences of we the fortunate few Others have been materially damaged by race and yet we’ve prevailed. But the less fortunate among us have paid too high a price: we only remember George Floyd because we’ve seen the video, but how many others before him have we not known or acknowledged?

In the end, as FDR pointed out in his inaugural address in 1937:

The test of our progress is not whether we add more to the abundance of those who have much; it is whether we provide enough for those who have too little.

I hope that my testimony in this series has opened your eyes to the reality of race in our society and, more importantly, that it’s inspired you to engage wholeheartedly in the fight to make ours a more equitable and just world.

As you hopefully now realize, there’s far more to the experience of Difference in our society than has been appreciated to this point, but the social unrest we’re seeing at present represents both a meaningful change and a most positive sign. It’s clear that as millions march around the globe, individually they may not fully comprehend the challenges that their fellows face, but by their presence they acknowledge that those challenges exist and should be addressed and eradicated.

I challenge you to go a bit further by engaging across Difference so that you can understand the structural impediments and very real impacts that these have in the day-to-day lives of the majority of our fellow citizens. Armed with this knowledge, then, I challenge you to go even further still: to engage fully in the process of helping to craft our path to the more equitable and just society/world we seek.

You see, the experience of being different is quite costly and personal, so I hope that you’ll choose to make your commitment to the eradication of these impediments personal as well. I further hope that you’ll choose to see that this isn’t someone else’s work to do, but yours, too.…

P.S. Just so we’re clear: I acknowledge that mine is but a singular experience, but I can assure you that it’s representative. Throughout my journey I’ve been supported by and supported countless others who’ve faced similar struggles. And please remember that the sole point in my sharing these stories is to help people of goodwill realize that there is much more to the stories and true life experiences of people whom you think you know, work with and may even consider friends. And while most of that ‘more to the story’ is a reflection of their idiosyncrasy in all its glory, some meaningful part of it for the vast majority of us who are different is a reflection of the burdens and very real pain inflicted on us by an unjust and inequitable society for immutable factors beyond our control that are actually accidents of nature, like differences in skin color (or gender or sexual orientation or national origin or…).

If you truly want to be a part of the solution in making ours a more just and equitable society and world, you have to get a bit dirty and understand the often ugly reality behind the well-composed masks that we show the world. I applaud you for considering this commitment and thank you in advance, as I know it’ll truly cost you something: the loss of the innocence bestowed by Privilege. And yet, I can also promise you this: as you develop a deeper appreciation for the real experiences of the Different in your life, you’ll also be invited to share in the God-given uniqueness embedded in all humanity, which is a blessing beyond description. Please do the work of fully understanding the challenge so that you can then fully appreciate and celebrate the benefits of this Difference while being fully appreciated and celebrated in return for what makes you different and unique.…

(Photo credits: https://quotefancy.com/quote/1066587/Gregg-Allman-It-s-hard-to-live-your-life-in-color-and-tell-the-truth-in-black-and-white; https://www.reddit.com/r/AccidentalRacism/comments/f7ylpb/youre_one_of_the_good_ones/; https://www.santabanta.com/picture-sms/author/will-smith/?parent=quotes; https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1950_NBA_playoffs; https://edithellenfoundation.blogspot.com/2016/08/we-rise-by-lifting-others-robert.html; Author's private collection; https://www.ted.com/talks/heather_c_mcghee_racism_has_a_cost_for_everyone?utm_campaign=tedspread&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=tedcomshare; https://quotefancy.com/quote/1362078/M-Scott-Peck-The-key-to-community-is-the-acceptance-in-fact-the-celebration-of-our)