The God Complex

A god complex refers to an unshakable belief that one possesses unlimited power or authority, often coupled with a sense of infallibility and superiority over others. Individuals with a god complex may exhibit narcissistic tendencies, believe their opinions or decisions are always correct, and may disregard the perspectives or autonomy of others. This mindset can manifest in various professions, especially those involving authority, like medicine or leadership, but can also appear in interpersonal relationships.

Although the term is not formally recognized as a mental health diagnosis, it is often used informally to describe such attitudes, especially when a person behaves in a controlling, domineering, or excessively self-important way. A god complex can damage personal relationships and result in ethical issues if the individual disregards boundaries or rules in their belief of superiority.

In Indian Culture we are taught to hold our elders in high respect and to obey our parents no matter what.

This is reinforced from a story that was repeated frequently.

The Story:

Once, Lord Shiva and Goddess Parvati, Ganesha’s parents, decided to test their two sons—Ganesha and Kartikeya—to see who was wiser and more devoted. They announced a competition: whoever could circumnavigate the world three times and return first would be considered the wiser son and would receive a special fruit (often described as the fruit of wisdom or immortality).

Kartikeya, being the god of war and speed, immediately mounted his peacock, his divine vehicle, and set off to physically travel around the world as quickly as possible.

Ganesha, however, was not as fast or agile as Kartikeya. He rode a mouse as his vehicle, which made it nearly impossible for him to compete in a physical race around the world. Instead of trying to beat his brother by speed, Ganesha thought deeply about the meaning of the task. He realized that, in Hindu philosophy, the parents are considered the center of a child's universe and symbolize the entire world.

With this insight, Ganesha calmly walked around his parents, Lord Shiva and Goddess Parvati, three times. After completing his rounds, he stood before them and declared, “You are my world. Walking around you is the same as walking around the world.”

The Outcome:

When Kartikeya returned after completing his long journey around the earth, he was surprised to find that Ganesha had already finished the challenge. Ganesha explained his reasoning to his parents. Impressed by his wisdom and understanding of the deeper meaning of the task, Shiva and Parvati declared Ganesha the winner of the competition and gave him the fruit.

Moral of the Story:

The story is a powerful reminder of the importance of wisdom over physical prowess and the deep respect for parents in Hindu culture. It teaches that intelligence, insight, and devotion can sometimes achieve more than mere speed or strength. It also reinforces the idea that parents hold a central place in the life of a child, symbolizing the whole world.

This can often lead parent to have a "God" complex.

When parents exhibit a god complex, it often manifests as authoritarian or controlling behavior. They may believe they are always right in how they raise their children, refusing to consider alternative perspectives or adapt their parenting style based on their child’s needs or desires. These parents may assume that they know what is best in all situations and expect unquestioning obedience, without respecting the child’s autonomy or individuality.

In such cases, a parent with a god complex may:

• Make unilateral decisions: Believing their choices are always in the best interest of their child without seeking input or considering the child’s feelings.
• Dismiss the child's emotions or opinions: A parent with this mindset might not take their child's emotions or opinions seriously, believing that their own perspectives are more valid.
• Impose rigid control: They might set strict rules and enforce them without explanation or flexibility, expecting total compliance.
• Undermine independence: By over-controlling, such parents can prevent their children from developing independence, self-esteem, and problem-solving skills.

This dynamic can have long-term effects on children, such as low self-esteem, difficulty asserting themselves, or feeling powerless in relationships. In contrast, children may also rebel strongly as they grow older, resisting the controlling behavior of their parents.

It's essential for parents to find a balance between authority and flexibility, fostering an environment where children feel heard and respected while still receiving guidance and structure.

Examples of behaviors a parent with a god complex might exhibit, often reflecting an attitude of "I know better" or "I'm always right":

1. Dismissing the Child’s Preferences:

• Example: The child expresses a desire to pursue a certain hobby or interest (e.g., music, art), but the parent insists on a different activity (e.g., sports) because they believe it will be more beneficial, disregarding the child's passion.
• Parent’s attitude: “You don’t know what’s best for you. I do.”

2. Making All Decisions Without Consultation:

• Example: The parent chooses the child’s school, extracurricular activities, or even friends without asking the child for input.
• Parent’s attitude: “I know what’s best for your future. There’s no need to ask for your opinion.”

3. Ignoring or Downplaying Emotions:

• Example: The child expresses sadness or frustration about something, and the parent dismisses it with phrases like, "You'll get over it," or "It’s not that big of a deal."
• Parent’s attitude: “Your feelings are insignificant compared to my wisdom. I know how you should feel.”

4. Controlling Career or Life Choices:

• Example: The parent pushes the child toward a particular career (e.g., doctor, lawyer) despite the child having no interest in that field, and disregards the child’s aspirations in other areas.
• Parent’s attitude: “You don’t understand the real world like I do. This is the only option if you want to be successful.”

5. Overriding the Child’s Autonomy in Small Decisions:

• Example: Even in smaller decisions like clothing or food preferences, the parent refuses to let the child choose. They might force the child to eat something they dislike or wear clothes they don’t feel comfortable in.
• Parent’s attitude: “I know what’s best for you in every aspect of your life. You’re too young to make good decisions.”

6. Rejecting Outside Advice:

• Example: A teacher, counsellor, or family friend suggests a different approach to handling the child’s behaviour or emotional needs, but the parent immediately dismisses the advice, believing they know better than anyone else.
• Parent’s attitude: “No one understands my child like I do. I don’t need outside opinions.”

7. Setting Unrealistic Standards and Expectations:

• Example: The parent sets extremely high standards for grades, behavior, or achievements, and when the child struggles or falls short, the parent dismisses their efforts and imposes further pressure.
• Parent’s attitude: “You’re capable of more than you think, but you don’t realize it. I know your potential better than you do.”

8. Invalidating the Child’s Ideas:

• Example: The child comes up with a creative idea or solution to a problem, and the parent immediately shuts it down, insisting their way is the only effective approach.
• Parent’s attitude: “That won’t work. I’ve been through this before, and my way is the only way to solve the problem.”

9. Micromanaging Daily Activities:

• Example: The parent dictates exactly how the child should complete tasks like homework, chores, or projects, not allowing them to develop their own methods or learn through trial and error.
• Parent’s attitude: “I know the right way to do this. You’re doing it wrong.”

10. Imposing Their Values and Beliefs Without Discussion:

• Example: The parent enforces certain religious, cultural, or personal beliefs, expecting the child to adopt them without question or consideration of the child’s evolving perspective.
• Parent’s attitude: “I’ve lived longer and know what’s right. You’ll understand one day why I’m correct.”