Goal Setting Heading into Another Pandemic New Year.

I’m usually a very driven & focused person, particularly around my work supporting parents & families & I usually create a Dream Board during the Twixmas period.

But I find myself hesitant & uncertain.

COVID-19 has dominated all our lives in the last couple of years. But as a New Year approaches the reality of the pandemic has not changed. You, like me, have found that life is vastly different than it was at the start of 2020. That means our goal setting probably should look & feel different too & that’s ok.

Many people now have a far emptier social calendar and a commute that involves walking across the kitchen rather than driving to work. On paper you’d think this would create more free time to accomplish more, but that isn't necessarily true.

This way of thinking doesn’t take into account all the psychological energy and time we might now need to properly adjust & adapt to life living with COVID-19. Many of us are still ‘pausing to ponder’ & processing the changes to our way of working, interacting & socialising.

We’re still adjusting our dreams.

I used to crank up the music, get into an enthusiastic state of mind with a large sheet of paper & create my Vision or Dream Board - focusing on work, relationships, family, health, hobbies & holiday goals based on my training with Tony Robbins.

But then came adjusting to living through a pandemic.

So, this year I’m rethinking my goals & I thought you might find my process helpful too as you ponder your next steps into 2022 as I am after all trained as a Parenting and Life Coach!

Change #1

Take it day by day.

Instead of setting big annual or 3-year goals, try setting daily smaller goals. There’s is no end in sight or ways of marking success with big, vague goals. I have found setting smaller ‘quick win’ goals more rewarding & achievable which I find lifts my spirit & keeps me positive & hopeful.

You’ll feel more success when you bring your goals down to a day-to-day level, particularly if you can cross things off your list, as you’ll see your progress pay off in small incremental steps which is rewarding and satisfying.

It is also OK to lower your expectations and to cut yourself some slack - try talking to yourself as if you are talking to a good friend as it’s the easiest way to acknowledge that you’re doing your best during an unprecedented time in history.

I have been doing this for a while now but what also makes this meaningful is Change 2 ?

?

Change #2

Focus on the why.

Instead of fixating on what you want to accomplish, think about why you want to accomplish it. Focusing on the why can help you to set goals that align with your priorities.

This has been really a game changer for me – as I find it easy to set daily, weekly, monthly & yearly goals but when I find my daily goals are all rather mundane - for example to go to the post office or to walk the dogs too often, I get demotivated and rather fed up. ?

Focusing on ‘why’ helps keep me looking at the bigger picture.

So, for 2022 for example I have created, written, filmed and recorded my new TODDLER Roadmap – a complete guide to raising happy, confident, resilient toddlers undamaged by living through a pandemic with lockdowns, uncertainty, and lack of social interaction and my ‘why’ is focused on telling parents about it because it’s important.

Another simple shift in focus and goal setting this new year is to explore connection.

Change #3

Look for connection in new ways.

As human beings we thrive on connection, belonging and feeling significant. Social distancing has changed how we interact drastically and unexpectedly. This loss of normalcy and the grief over what is no longer possible can lead to a sense of emptiness, and even a loss of meaning in life for many. So, finding meaning is an important element for recovery in the process.

Look for new ways to connect with people, nature, animals, and your own self to increase your own well-being. One simple and powerful way is to explore your creativity - painting, gardening, sewing, writing, doing jigsaws or crosswords, drawing, or making music. Creativity releases dopamine, a natural anti-depressant and it reduces anxiety, depression, and stress & it can also help you process trauma.

Life Crafting & the Japanese concept of ‘Ikigai’

‘Ikigai’ is defined as a sense of ‘a life worth living’

As I find myself coming to terms with a sense of loss, I’m looking to give my life a new clear direction and more importantly momentum.

A more structured approach to finding meaning and purpose in life, called ‘life crafting,’ was recently proposed by Schippers and Ziegler in 2019. They defined the term life crafting as ‘a process in which people actively reflect on their present and future life, set goals for important areas of life – social, career, and leisure time – and, if required, make concrete plans and undertake actions to change these areas in a way that is more congruent with their values and wishes.’

It's important to acknowledge and accept that we aren’t living in the same world that we did before, and productivity can look different when the future feels suspended.

At a time when life feels in limbo, it’s important to take into account the emotional toll it can take and to avoid holding yourself to the same goals and standards that you did in the pre-pandemic world.

Here are my:

Life Crafting Questions for Clarity, Direction and Confidence

What am I most grateful for in 2021?

What am I most proud of?

What have I learnt about myself during these turbulent times?

What were my greatest challenges? How did I approach them – what did I do well to cope?

What did I have to accept?

What did I have to let go of?

What is something positive I did in 2021 that I believe I will remember for the rest of my life as it was important?

Where did I find the most peace and calm?

What things are out of my control?

What things are in my control?

How can I align those two aspects of my life and find balance between what I can control and what I can’t?

As I enter 2022 what goal is the most important for me to focus on right now? ?How do I commit to that now?

What’s my first small step?

What would achieving my goal mean to me? What difference would it make?

How can I break this goal down into bite sized manageable steps?

What barriers might get in the way of me achieving this goal?

How can I overcome these barriers and keep myself accountable and motivated with a feeling of moving forward towards achieving my goal over time?

How can I bend, not break as life keeps changing – how can I become flexible on the journey?

How can I pat myself on the back regularly - what do I like to do to celebrate the small wins?

As we enter a new year it’s perhaps time to not just think about surviving but determining better practices for thriving. It's time to reboot, recalibrate and reconnect with your dormant goals and dreams.

This is not easy - but important.

We're all just creating our own blueprint in real time for how to deal with the novel coronavirus. Most of us have mastered social distancing, sanitising and washing our hands and wearing a mask but maybe not how to live through change.

Nothing achieved, created or discovered this year is irrelevant; all our personal wins are significant in 2021.

This isn’t about making New Year's resolutions — which mostly yield temporary results – this is about examining the big picture and incorporating holistic and sustainable changes designed to impact our personal, professional and spiritual lives positively.

I wish you peace, happiness and harmony as we enter the new year.

What are some of your dreams and goals for 2022?

?

?

I found the paper published in Frontiers in Psychology to be very insightful. https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2020.577708/full#ref7

Elisabeth M. de Jong, Niklas Ziegler and Michaéla C. Schippers

Department of Technology and Operations Management, Rotterdam School of Management, Erasmus University, Rotterdam, Netherlands

?