Giving and Receiving Better Feedback at Work

When was the last time you received unclear feedback at work? A vague performance review that left you unsure what to actually improve, think about, or even begin to change? I'm sure we can all relate.

It's frustrating. Without constructive feedback, how can we grow? How do we know our strengths to build on and our areas to grow?

In my recent conversation on the SPARKED podcast with executive coach and founder of The Corporate Alley Cat, Deborah T. Owens , we explored how to transform vague feedback into an engine for growth. How can we reframe performance management as a collaborative partnership, not an adversarial process?

Imagine if you could approach every review as an opportunity to learn and improve. Here are three tips we discussed:

1. Stick to Observable Facts, Not Subjective Judgments.?

Feedback grounded in real examples is most constructive. I know it's tempting to avoid confrontation, but clarifying vague feedback is key. Ask for specifics like "Thanks for sharing this, it’s not something I’ve been aware of, can you please share some particular instances where you’ve observed this, so I can better understand how to grow from it?"

1. Take Time to Process Emotional Feedback Before Responding.

It's natural to feel defensive. Especially if you disagree with the nuance, content or interpretation of an experience that led to the feedback. Pausing lets you assess what may be valid before circling back and lets some of the emotion discharge, so you can step into the conversation in a more fact-driven, objective and value-creating way. Deborah found that simply saying some version of, "let me think about this and get back to you" can defuse tension and set the stage for a more collaborative, productive, and less emotionally-charged conversation.

1. Assume Good Intent.?

Approach reviews as a dialogue where you're on the same team, and give the benefit of the doubt that what’s being offered is coming from a place of generosity and desire to work together to create a positive outcome. Will this always be true? No. But if you start from this position, you at least give conversations that include well-intended, but poorly-offered feedback the chance to be recovered and redirected toward a more mutually-acceptable and even desirable outcome, Use language like "Tell me more, I want to learn from this." When we give each other the benefit of the doubt, it creates space for honesty.

With empathy and facts, we get closer to unlocking the potential for feedback to become a gift, not a weapon. Truth is, we all have both triggers and blindspots, and we all have room to learn and grow. Imagine if we could evolve corporate culture to ensure everyone receives the clear, objective, and constructive feedback they need to reach their full potential.

When reviews become mutually enlightening dialogues instead of stressful endeavors, and we foster dignity, growth and psychological safety along the way.?

For deeper insights, listen to the full conversation with Deborah Owens on the SPARKED podcast . Together, we can transform performance management from adversarial to collaborative. When we help each other grow, we all rise.

How do you aim to make feedback more constructive for yourself and others? I'd love to hear your thoughts and experiences in the comments. #feedback #communication #workplaceculture

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