Given a Chance

When I was 17, my younger brother’s little league soccer team needed a coach. None of the parents were able to step up, so I volunteered and began coaching the team on my own.

During the first few practices, I focused on teaching basic skills and running drills to evaluate how well the players might fit into my preferred 4-4-2 formation. As I rotated the boys through various position drills, they would eagerly share their thoughts on where they believed they should play. Occasionally, they’d even suggest positions for their teammates. I listened but largely ignored their unsolicited advice.

At one point, as I rotated a boy named Nathan into a drill, several players made harsh comments:“Why are you putting him in?”“He’s no good.”Some even used euphemisms to imply that Nathan lacked the skills to contribute meaningfully to the team.

Nathan was noticeably smaller than the other boys. He was quiet, shy, and carried himself in a way that suggested he believed some of the disparaging remarks from his peers. While he didn’t particularly stand out during drills, I noticed a few key things about him: he wasn’t intimidated by the other players, he was quick and agile, and he listened carefully, applying any coaching I gave him.

Nathan wasn’t going to be a superstar striker—he didn’t have the instinct for scoring—but his athleticism and tenacity made him a perfect fit for a roving defender role. I decided to position him as a “stopper.” This would allow me to adjust our formation from a 4-4-2 to a 3-1-4-2, giving us better control of the midfield and freeing up the wing midfielders to press more aggressively on offense.

I worked with Nathan on defensive techniques, made him the starting stopper, and gave him the freedom to play his game. He excelled. Few teams could get the ball more than 10 meters past midfield without Nathan breaking up or disrupting the play. My goalkeepers were rarely tested, and I seldom substituted anyone in for Nathan.

We won all but one game that season, but the most rewarding moment came after our final game. A woman approached me and introduced herself as Nathan’s mother. She said, “I want to thank you for what you did for Nathan this season.”

I replied, “Nathan earned everything he got this season.”

She smiled and said, “Yes, but no one else ever gave him a chance.”

That moment stayed with me. It reminded me that we all want someone to recognize our strengths, not our shortcomings, and to give us a chance. It also taught me that sometimes we need to adjust our expectations and be open to new possibilities. By giving others the opportunity to showcase their strengths, we may find ourselves pleasantly surprised by the outcome.