Give yourself permission to...

We believe in unicorns.

Before doing something scary, we often wait to be told exactly what we need to hear, delivered perfectly by someone we trust, at a precise time and place where it'll all make sense. See, unicorns. This depreciates our instincts. Fact is, we don’t trust ourselves all that much to start a new (career) adventure if it isn’t flanked by proof and paths.

Self-doubt's partially to blame. Marketing too. Great ads condition us to constantly “need” yet another professional tool endorsed by a respected expert before we trade the comfort of normalcy for the unease of uncertainty. For us to try it, someone else needs to have already done it. Shouldn’t we be cool with arriving at our own conclusions irrespective of what others think?

In requiring the approval of those we admire before we try something risky yet fulfilling, we stunt our growth and silence our voices. Instead, we must become our own closest advisors and permit ourselves to venture into the unknown. Only then can we return with an unbelievable story worth sharing.

I see so many folks looking for signs and validation from others - to get started on something their heart already told them it craves. Not just newbies and toe-dippers, either. Even accomplished leaders, multi-figure execs, and world-class athletes seek the consent of those they look up to and/or pay for advice before they take the plunge. Yet, it’s the anecdotes about those who forged ahead when everyone - including their advisors - told them not to that inspire us, no?

Some see my success as the exception and the iceberg tip, discounting the decades’ worth of hard yards beneath the surface. They misinterpret what they feel in their soul about a new possibility as anxiety or nervousness. So they procrastinate for years, suffering from analysis paralysis, spectatorship, and busywork.

As I learned from Marie Forleo, if an idea swells you up with pride and energy, your body may be trying to tell you it’s excited, not stressed. When an idea contracts and exhausts you, it’s probably not worth pursuing: you can let it go.

An expanding sensation is your soul saying, "I can't wait!". A collapsing one means it's saying, "Nah, we're good.". These are your instincts talking, and you’d do well to become fluent.

Give yourself permission to succeed while accepting that you will most certainly fail. But that’s a good thing. Failure isn’t the opposite of success: it’s the pathway to it. The insights you earn through experimentation and practice lead to revelations you can only gather after you’ve personally been through some sh!t. The journey of self-discovery is a destination unto itself as you undertake anything you’re unsure but pumped up about.

Coaches, consultants, and mentors are like your GPS systems in life and business. Accountability partners ride shotgun and check your blind spots. But your vehicle won’t reach its destination without the proper maintenance, steering, speed, acceleration, and braking. Self-permission green lights the journey and performs that tune-up so that you’re ready to roll once that garage door comes up.

Almost no idea’s original, so it’s ok to seek direction, but some opportunities live in the uncharted territories paved by discomfort zones. Plus, footprints alone don’t get people to walk the path toward the water they can’t be made to drink. Exploration is a price of admission for entrepreneurship, so to prosper, you’ve got to be in the trailblazing business, darling.

Give yourself permission to fail. It’s life’s greatest teacher, its lessons will enrich you, and it’s available to all 24/7. It doesn’t matter if you’re a fresh-faced graduate or a multi-hyphenate mogul - we all hesitate and second-guess when risk is involved. But when we risk nothing or very little, we ironically risk everything that could be.?

Trusting ourselves means permitting ourselves to trek without any obvious guarantees, save for one: enlightenment. So really, you’re enabling yourself to become wiser and cultivated. That’s the irrevocable reward that matters most. Not audiences reached nor units sold. When your value and worth aren’t tethered to the market or idols, there’s only one person’s opinion left that counts.

You or someone you know needs to read this. I permit you to share it with them.