Give your kids roots to grow and wings to fly.

My teenage sons are fast approaching adulthood. Marlon, is just 17, in his last year of college. When he started exploring universities, I went out to dinner with friends, and as I talked about his options. I texted Marlon new ideas, and he researched the suggestions and messaged me back. In our discussion were ETH Zurich, RWTH Aachen, TU Delft, MIT, and Amsterdam.

"Delft looks really cool, the library is wicked, plus they have a tester day. I could try to sign up. But it's the day after tomorrow. Could we go together?" he asked.

I checked my calendar and texted back, “Sorry, I have a trip tomorrow. Is there another tester day soon?”

“Yes, but it's after the application deadline.”

Then I thought, what are my priorities? What is our job as parents? What could be more meaningful than helping shape our children’s future—their way—and, in doing so, learning something new ourselves? There isn’t a greater purpose than providing a good future for our loved ones, right? A visit like this could be a turning point. "Sure, sign up for the tester day, and we’ll plan the travel later." I then tried to squeeze my two-day trip into one and booked us a trip to Amsterdam and Delft.

Though I’m a parent today, I remember being his age and making my own choices. My parents didn’t go to university, but they encouraged me to pursue it. Attending a tester day is such a fantastic opportunity—I wish I’d had that.

Our trip was fantastic. We arrived the night before, with events beginning at 9 a.m. the next morning. We found a hotel nearby, and to our surprise, it had a music theme, complete with a band setup in the lobby. While I checked in, Marlon asked the receptionist if he could plug in a guitar, and soon he was playing the electric guitar.

That evening, we went to Rotterdam for dinner because I’d only heard great things about it. We stumbled upon a rock festival, "Left of the Dial"—his favorite genre. We listened, chatted with a rock band from Brooklyn, NYC, and met people from all over. I thought, maybe this place is not only for studying but also an environment where he could grow, connect, and thrive.

The next morning, we went to the sprawling university campus. The first thing they handed us was a bike with a lock—"Enjoy the ride," they said. The campus is so big you need 10-15 minutes to get from one end to the other by bike!

The day started with an introductory session on engineering, covering topics like CPUs (in Dutch, but with Google Translate and my Amsterdam work experience, we managed). Luckily, the following sessions were in English. There was a fascinating workshop on aerodynamic engineering (rockets and airplanes) and a computer science lecture, all with a strong emphasis on teamwork. “If you want to be successful here, you work in teams,” one professor said. Near the "Networked Embedded Robotics Lab," a sign read, "Design for our future." I was struck by how welcoming the tester day felt. The people were open, and the study content felt accessible, inviting students to engage rather than impress. Honestly, I felt tempted to sign up myself, whether as a student, project partner, or even as a teacher! (But that’s a story for another day. After all, we live long enough to have at least two or more careers.)

Throughout the day, we spoke with alumni from Delft, Oxford, and MIT. We had fun riding bikes, eating good food, and enjoying coffee. The sunny day might have been a touch "kitsch," but we embraced it.

The library alone was inspiring enough to make anyone want to learn with a new mindset. Built with a rooftop hill for walking, picnics, or naps, it offered a perfect view. Underneath, a 10-meter-high cone jutted out of the hill, housing a library with a staircase inside where you could study or just take in the view. Every building had massive bike parking.

After a full day of highlights and fresh ideas on community and teamwork, we explored the picturesque village of Delft, then headed to Utrecht for a brief business meeting before going to Amsterdam to prepare for the next day. What a packed day, rich with impressions!

In the end, I know it was the right thing to do—and a lot of fun. Travel time is golden. If you have children and the chance to visit places where they might build their future, take it. Whether it leads them there or to a different place, they’ll be able to make a more informed choice with your support.

Never stop learning. Remember, you’ve been in their place as a child. Did you know where you would end up? No, but the journey itself is the goal (“Der Weg ist das Ziel,” as Buddhism says). I agree. Ambition is essential for deciding what to achieve, study, and work toward, but it’s incomplete without the right balance of expectation—a key to happiness. Seeing places where life might unfold helps set realistic expectations. Experience teaches more than data. Every step counts.