GIVE TO THEM STRAIGHT!

You know the scene. Camera close-up on a tough-looking gumshoe; haggard face, three-day stubble, collar undone, tie askew under his open gaberdine raincoat; cigarette drooping beneath his squinting, blood-shot eyes. Thin lips part to utter, “Give it to me straight!” Tell me the worst. Forget the sugar-coating. Just tell me how it is.

And that is want most people want from their boss, their superior, their leader. They want you to give it to them straight.

We have become so used in recent years to avoiding the truth, somehow. We have become coy, furtive almost, anxious to do anything but upset a colleague or a subordinate when we have to deliver bad news to them. We do not say things like, Your work is not up to standard. You have messed up here. You missed a crucial deadline. Instead, we find some weak euphemism or other for the fact that they have failed to reach our expectations in their professional performance, their professional conduct, or their fundamental duty. Exercising our authority as leaders has become tentative, half-hearted, enfeebled, because we are somehow fearful to tell it like it is. To give it to them straight.

It happens in schools a lot, because being such-labour-intensive organisations with mostly highly-qualified staff with whom we inevitably have a close personal relationship, we fall into the trap of needing to be liked more than we need to be respected. It also happens in schools a lot because our front-line leaders - our classroom teachers – often feel unready or unable to take a stand.

And that means we compromise our integrity, accepting standards that we have indicated we would not accept; allowing sub-standard work to pass because we cannot upset people; walking past behaviour we should not accept if we are to be true to our organisation’s values because we don’t want to deal with the fall-out. ?

But every time it happens, every time we do it, we erode our authenticity as leaders. We lead like someone we are not, or like someone who is not the leader we really want to appear to be.

Aytekin Tank addresses the challenge of being authentic as a leader (in 3 ingredients of an authentic workplace, Fastcompany, 8 July 22). ?As leaders, we see and hear about authenticity everywhere, he writes, at conferences, during keynote presentations, in business books, and especially on social media. There’s a pressure for you, your company and your workplace to appear as authentic as possible.

But paradoxically, Tank continues, there’s nothing more disingenuous than telling people how?authentic?you are. That, he suggests, comes across as fake. Your authenticity is not something that can be commodified. Instead, it comes from your core principles and leadership style.

In other words, Tank asserts, authenticity comes from our positive example at the top.

Tank recognises how hard it is consistently to demonstrate our authenticity as leaders – at whatever level we lead. He cites research reported in the Harvard Business Review by Vanessa Buote, who acknowledges that most of us engage in self-presentation – and also in less-than-authentic self-preservation - in the workplace at least occasionally. ?We actively and intentionally ‘manage’ ?- or fake! - our behaviour and emotions, or we deliberately manage the way we are perceived by co-workers and bosses.

Buote suggests we do this for a variety of reasons: Some people feel they cannot freely express what they are really, genuinely feeling at work;?others believe they cannot be themselves or show their sense of humour; and still others feel they must appear as though they have it all together or they risk hurting their reputation or credibility. In other words, even as leaders striving to be authentic, we sometimes change our behaviour intentionally so that we do not upset, alienate, or otherwise irritate or provoke our fellow-workers and colleagues.

However, as Tank points out, Buote’s research actually revealed that people who stayed true to their values, maintained their integrity and were authentic, actually fared better than inauthentic employees. People who behaved and acted in an authentic way reported significantly increased job satisfaction and engagement, greater happiness at work, a stronger sense of community, more inspiration, and lower job stress. All good things, as Tank indicates.

He goes on to admit that when he was a freshly-minted entrepreneur (Tank is the founder and CEO of online form website Jotform) he did the opposite of showing up as himself. At the time, I thought I needed to appear to have everything together all the time, he concedes, continuing, I struggled deeply with perfectionism, and this made it hard for me to connect with others. I’ve learned a lot since those initial days and would like to share some of those lessons with you, he offers.

HOW DOES A LEADER NURTURE AN AUTHENTIC WORKPLACE?

Don’t try to lead like someone else. ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? Don’t try to fit the mould of a type of leader you are not, Tank advises. There was a time when many of my business colleagues would try on a Steve Jobs leadership style, he recalls. I’m sure you can picture it: wearing the same outfit every day, giving lengthy presentations meant to inspire, using motivational quotes for pep talks. As you can imagine, this didn’t necessarily scream “authentic.”?If anything, it was the opposite.

I’d like to suggest an entirely different approach, Tank says. Lead in the way that comes most naturally to you. For example, he adds, I don’t consider myself someone who gives heated, impassioned speeches. I have a calm, soft-spoken demeanour, and I don’t try to change that aspect of my personality to garner popularity. Being myself—no matter who I am with—makes me feel more self-assured, and it allows my team to feel they can show up the same way, he avers.

In other words, don’t try to fake it. Your people will see through that at once. Especially in the classroom, if not especially in the staff room. Adolescents have especially sharp antennae to detect teachers who are fakes. At whatever level you lead in your school, be yourself. That way you don’t have to work so hard at being someone you are not.

Make honesty your biggest leadership attribute.??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? Creating an authentic workplace does?not?mean holding “authenticity” workshops where everyone shares their feelings, Tank observes, adding, It’s about?showing, and not?telling.?And what I mean by this is leading with honesty and transparency at all times.

What does this look like? It means you act in ways that show genuine care and respect for those you lead – for senior staff if you are the Principal; for your classroom teaching team if you head up a teaching department; and for your kids in your classes, if you are a classroom teacher. Instead of working hard at merely projecting an image of authenticity, act in ways that show people you are. ?If someone you lead is struggling, build their trust through showing them empathy. Prioritise people’s well-being.

As Tank attests, a workplace that places honesty at the centre of all of its relationships amongst those who work there is one that has true?depth in the consistency with which it demonstrates and lives out its core values — and that is much more significant and of greater worth than superficial attachment to any kind of buzzword authenticity.

Work on yourself consistently.???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? As his third teaching point, Tank cites author Ursula Le Guin, who wrote, The only questions that really matter are the ones you ask yourself. There is absolutely no way to create a truly authentic culture, Tank affirms, unless you are willing constantly to do the inner work needed to reflect and grow.

To be effective and authentic leaders, we will recognise and accept Tank’s assertion that we have to know ourselves first in order to be able understand and empathise with others. Daniel Goleman could not have been more clear in his setting self-awareness as the most important attribute of emotionally intelligent people. Tank explains how he regularly takes pauses throughout his day to reflect and process what he has been dealing with. He goes for a walk outdoors (you will know how a walk around the school during break-time or even during class time allows you to clear your head and escape from your emails for spell.) Some colleague leaders intentionally spend quiet time alone in the mornings. Doing this, Tank says, helps him to embrace the present moment so that I can go back to work and be the best possible version of myself—which is what it means to truly show up.

Tank believes enhancing our self-awareness is key in inspiring creative thought and innovation, informing one of our key responsibilities as leaders in developing our vision for our institution or organisation because it allows us to overcome mental challenges and not become self-absorbed. Enhancing our own self-awareness, Tank says, keeps our focus on doing what as leaders should be our top priority: ensuring that we pay due regard to the personal and professional growth as well as to the individual well-being of our people, and creating a workplace that doesn’t promote superficial loyalty to a buzzword over authentic, genuine, actual meaning and purpose.