Give the gifts they can’t touch, but that touch them deeply

Tangible gifts are something you can touch - money and material gifts are two examples of this category. Intangibles are something that you can’t touch, but sometimes are more important and valuable than tangible gifts.?

Here are 15 Intangible gifts (in no particular order) that come to mind:

1. Gift of Belief in Them

Believing in someone means recognizing their potential and encouraging them to reach it. This gift instills confidence, helping individuals to push beyond their self-imposed limitations and strive for greatness. If you genuinely believe in them more than they believe in themselves, you would unlock a world of new possibilities for their future.

2. Gift of Empathetic Listening

Empathetic listening involves fully engaging with someone’s thoughts and feelings without judgment. This gift provides validation and comfort, making the person feel truly heard and understood. I learned the? concept of making the other person? "feeling felt" from my friend, late Dr. Mark Goulston's book "Just Listen." it’s about making others feel truly understood and empathized with. This involves deeply listening and acknowledging the emotions and experiences of others, going beyond just hearing their words. When people feel felt, they sense that you genuinely grasp their feelings and perspectives, which can break down emotional barriers and build trust.

3. Gift of a Timely Question

A well-timed question can prompt introspection and reveal hidden insights. This gift can guide someone towards clarity and a deeper understanding of their situation or challenge. My favorite question when a mentee brings a citation or a challenge? is a collaborative one - “Shall we explore what we should be seeing but are not?”

4. Gift of a Thoughtful Connection

Connecting people who can mutually benefit from knowing each other fosters growth and opportunity for both parties. This gift can open doors, create collaborations, and support personal and professional development.

5. Gift of Accountability

Holding someone accountable for their goals and actions encourages discipline and follow-through. This gift helps individuals stay on track and committed to their objectives, leading to greater achievements. A promise that one makes to themselves is the hardest to keep. The gift of accountability helps makes that promise slightly easier to keep.

6. Gift of a Relevant Referral

Providing a referral to a relevant resource or contact can significantly advance someone’s progress. This gift leverages your network and knowledge to offer targeted support and opportunities.

7. Gift of a Powerful Reframe

A reframe involves changing the way one interprets a specific situation or experience. It focuses on altering the context or perception of a particular event or thought. Reframing a situation offers a new perspective, transforming challenges into opportunities. This gift empowers individuals to see possibilities and solutions they might have overlooked.

8. Gift of a Perspective Shift

A perspective shift is broader and involves changing the overall way one views a situation, oneself, or the world. It’s a more comprehensive change in one’s mindset or belief system. Encouraging someone to view a situation from a different angle can lead to breakthroughs and innovation. This gift expands their thinking and fosters open-mindedness and adaptability.

9. Gift of Reasoning

Sharing logical and well-thought-out reasoning helps clarify complex issues. This gift aids in decision-making and promotes a deeper understanding of the subject at hand. Paraphrasing what the CEO of 英伟达 , Jensen Huang said - “When any one of his direct reports brings a situation and asks for his take, it is my responsibility to respond back how I would reason through the situation.” - that’s a big gift right there.

10. Gift of Benefit of Compassion

Offering compassion means showing understanding and kindness towards someone’s struggles. This gift provides emotional support and can be incredibly healing and empowering. Bonus points for you if instead of giving them the benefit of the doubt, you offer them the benefit of compassion. The former is understanding from the head and the latter is understanding from the heart. As we both know, connection from the heart is far more powerful than the connection from the head.

11. Gift of Caring

Demonstrating genuine care for someone’s well-being builds trust and strengthens relationships. This gift fosters a sense of security and belonging. If you can care for them more than they care for themselves, you have sown the seeds of magic in your relationship.

12. Gift of a Higher Standard

Encouraging someone to aim for higher standards motivates them to exceed their expectations. This gift pushes individuals to pursue excellence and reach their full potential.

13. Gift of an Implied Endorsement

Subtly endorsing someone’s abilities or character without explicit praise builds their reputation and credibility. This gift can enhance their confidence and open new opportunities for them. Implied endorsement comes from publicly declaring your positive association with them. Depending on how powerful your brand is, this lending of your name can be a powerful boost to their own brand.

14. Gift of Reflection

Encouraging someone to take time for reflection allows them to gain insights into their experiences and actions. This gift promotes self-awareness and personal growth, helping individuals to learn from their past and plan for a better future. My God-daughter Soundarya Balasubramani shared a quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson that is quite apt here - “What lies behind us, and what lies before us, are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.” When you give the gift of reflection, you are essentially helping them uncover their own power within themselves.

15. Gift of Applicable and Contextual? Knowledge

As my friend Ravishankar Gundlapalli PhD Gundlapalli says,, “contextual knowledge is far more powerful than conceptual knowledge.” If conceptual knowledge is like “ingredients and the recipe to prepare the dish,” contextual knowledge is like a “hot dish prepared and served to you.” The latency to experience the benefit is less in the latter.

Over to you:

What would you add to the above list of Intangible gifts?