Give before you get

Remember when your parents and teachers would give out if you didn’t share? It turns out they were teaching you one of the most powerful weapons of influence, reciprocation. This is the first weapon of influence discussed by Robert Cialdini in his international best seller Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion. We are all taught from an early age the importance of sharing. This is because sharing is essential to how our society functions. We share and expect others to share in return.

The Professor and the Christmas Cards 

Cialdini describes the case of a Professor (with too much time on his hands) who conducted a little experiment to test the power of reciprocation. He sent a bunch of Christmas cards to people who didn’t know him to see if they would reply. Soon his post box was stuffed with cards wishing him a happy Christmas from complete strangers.

Why did Strangers Send Christmas Cards?

Why would these people take the time to return a Christmas card to someone they didn’t even know? The answer is, they were following the rule of reciprocity. Simply put, if someone does a favour for you, you feel obliged to return the favour. In the case of the professor and the Christmas cards, these strangers felt obliged to reciprocate season greetings. 

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