The Gift of Time

The company I was working for decided to make my role redundant 45 days after merging with my previous employer. This decision was particularly disheartening as I had played a key role in shaping the culture they aspired to incorporate —one designed intentionally with executives and employees to foster an environment where we could all thrive and find meaning in our work.

Theoretically, the situation sucked. I was traveling to my home country the day after, and for the next weeks went through so many emotions connected to mourning: disbelief, pain, anger, despair, fear, disappointment…

But then I had an epiphany. I didn't have a 9-to-5 job anymore, but I was left with something precious: TIME.

I don’t know about you, but my “bucket list” has been growing for years. I always told myself, “I’ll do it when I have time” or “I’ll take time off for this.” This mindset led to procrastination; there was always something more urgent or demanding. Work and being a mom were always prioritized. I felt the pressure to deliver, to prove my worth, to be a good leader, mentor, mother, role model. Consequently, anything for myself fell to the bottom of my list. So many dreams, so little time. I never started yoga lessons. I ate processed foods because I was exhausted and didn’t cook for myself. Despite my natural artistic skills, I was too overwhelmed to even think of picking up the brush and start painting again. I came to realize that whatever time I had left after working and mothering, was my gift to others, not to myself. Every-single-day. Since the 1900's, literally (ha).

But time is the one thing you can never bring back, no matter what “Back to the Future” and Hollywood may have suggested. So I concluded that, given my -hopefully- temporary “new normal”, I needed to design a fresh routine that would support my mental, spiritual and physical health until I got back in the game. Something to keep me positive, busy and focused.

One of my greatest fears has always been falling into depression. Having gone through it after giving birth to an ultra-premature kid that spent several months in the NICU, I am determined not to let that happen again. Building this new routine became imperative—a need rather than just a wish. Fortunately, this new routine could finally incorporate time for ME.

Now, I split my day into three areas: body, mind, and spirit.

Body Time includes yoga and pilates; cooking healthy meals; staying hydrated (with occasional visits to my favorite coffee shop); getting good sleep, and keeping up with household chores.

Mind Time involves reading from my extensive library (filled with books I never had time for); experimenting with oil paints on canvas, and, most importantly, planning my next career move. It may lead me back to a corporate job, to pursuing a PhD, to independent consulting, or to 'all of the above'. I’m not sure yet, but I will get there.

Spiritual Time focuses on my connection with God and others—praying, going to Church, volunteering at my daughter’s school, having deep conversations with my partner as he navigates his own corporate challenges, and hosting gatherings at home of diverse nature. These interactions fill my heart with happiness and self-reflection and inspire me to do better, get better, be better—for myself and for those around me.

I am far from perfect. Sometimes anxiety wins. I have dark moments where I feel scared or in despair. But I remind myself that darkness always precedes light; it is through darkness that we appreciate the beauty of brightness. We, humans, are all drawn to the light. We all want to be part of something bigger. We all want to be inspired and to be remembered by someone. For something. So I stay alert. When darkness creeps in, I change environments—I go to the gym, call a friend, run errands, or cook a meal. During winter months when sunlight is scarce for weeks on end, it’s especially important for me to keep myself on check and be consistently self-aware.

I lost my job. I fight the feeling of worthlessness. But I am not a victim. And I choose gratitude. I am thankful for the realization that life moves quickly and that I don’t want to wait until I’m in my mid-60s to pursue all those dreams I’ve held onto for so long. Today is mine because I was gifted back the time to live purposefully, intentionally. I am grateful for the opportunity to invest my time more wisely, focusing on those I love, including myself. Striving to be happy and to bring happiness to those around me. That, in the end, is the essence of what I do for a living— thinking of culture, diversity and inclusion as opportunities to bring kindness and respect to work environments. I don’t need to understand you, I don’t need to agree with you. But I need to appreciate your value, just because you are as human, as beautiful and as flawed as I am. Until companies understand that operating under the premise of solidarity and respect makes businesses more sustainable in the long-term, we will all be fighting for a false “supremacy”.

Time is precious and irreversible, and we each have the moral responsibility to become the best possible version of ourselves while uplifting those around us—individuals and organizations alike—as they embark on their own journeys. Change unfolds one step at a time, one day at a time, and we can all be examples of what we want to see around us. If we celebrate our imperfections instead of hiding them, we can then embrace the fact that we are always evolving. Moving. Learning. Growing.

Only then, we’ll be able to look in the mirror and be proud of the human that’s staring back at us. Only then, we’ll be able to help change the world —and be remembered for it.