Ghosting - The Executive Recruiter's Perspective

Have you ever been deep into a conversation about an opportunity . . . and your recruiter disappears?

I was grateful to have joined Megan Lynch and Tom Ackerman for a radio interview on KMOX | Audacy Radio on Halloween, discussing the topic of ghosting, and thought it might be valuable to expand on this subject and share my personal connection.? ?

Early in my career as an executive recruiter, I had a fun side gig.? I doubled as a weekly dating and relationship columnist for a major publication in Chicago.? For years, by day, I recruited candidates on the corporate side of my life, and by night I penned 800-word weekly analyses on the intricacies of the romantic human connection. The two sides of my life were surprisingly similar.

One week, I wrote about the perils of ghosting through a persona that I referred to as Vaporman -? someone who disappears from your life, without warning or provocation, after a handful of dates or even during an actual relationship.? No communication, reasons given, or opportunity for closure.? Just gone.??

Given the popularity of that particular article, apparently ghosting is rampant.?

In parallel, recruiters have received similar complaints and earned bad reputations for vanishing after engaging candidates in a process, only to leave them in the dark about their status.? Whether it's personal or professional, being ghosted is disheartening and frustrating and remains a contentious issue.??

I can safely say, however, that in both situations, it all boils down to communication!

The advice is strikingly similar, whether we're talking about love lives or livelihoods. However, today? I can help demystify ghosting from the recruiter's perspective.??

First, please understand that there's no malicious intent.? While we are hired by our clients, we also care deeply about candidates. Most recruiters have chosen this profession because we enjoy connecting with people and introducing them to our clients for the best possible outcome.? We are truly rooting for you.?? However, although our intentions are good (what's the saying about the road to hell being paved with good intentions?), I will admit that many of us have left our candidates with unsatisfying experiences.?

The following are not excuses. I won't bother sharing the number of candidates and clients we speak to in a day, or the amount of resumes that we review. I realize that you don't care. Here are a handful of points that can truly shed light on ghosting, and provide the recruiter perspective.

• Timing.? I was once openly accused of ghosting a candidate who remained a strong contender for the role, and I was confused until it occurred to me that our expectations of timing weren't aligned, which was ultimately my fault.? Each search has a unique interview process.? While it would be ideal for candidates to receive a decision immediately following an interview,? it's not always possible.? Our clients like (and deserve) to have a good comparison, which means that each presented candidate has to navigate several rounds of interviews before informed and thoughtful decisions can be made.? Taking into account the inevitable scheduling delays and time for interview teams to calibrate and make decisions, recruiters might not have meaningful information to share until weeks later, after all contenders have met each client stakeholder.?

• Our client has changed direction.? Clients have been known to cancel searches. Or, in some cases, they put engagements on hold, or decide to explore candidates outside of the original search parameters.?? This does not automatically mean that previously considered candidates are out of the running, but unfortunately, they might be inadvertently left in limbo for a few weeks while we determine the next steps.

• Lack of information.?? Most recruiters like to provide useful information when informing a candidate that s/he has been removed from a process.? Sometimes there are lessons learned that can be applied in future job searches.?? To speak for myself, for the benefit of my candidates, I like to wait until I've had a chance to connect with clients directly and talk through the reasons why a candidate has been eliminated.?

• The dread of delivering tough messages.? This is a classic recruiter conundrum.? When a candidate becomes a finalist, we are REALLY excited to deliver the good news, and often do so immediately.? Conversely, when we have to share the news that the candidate didn't make it to the next level, we're never happy to make those calls.? We've grown close to our candidates, and we feel your disappointment.?? We realize that candidates would rather be told as soon as possible, but some recruiters put it off to the point where the candidate has to inquire.? We can and should do better.

So, as a candidate, how do you defend against the possibility of ghosting?? I have a few suggestions!

First, get a sense of timing from the recruiter.? In the event that the recruiter doesn't proactively provide this information, it's perfectly fine to ask where they are in the process,? how many rounds of interviews, and when the client is expected to make a decision.? It's also a good practice to communicate your timing, which includes being open about other roles that you're considering and whether or not you're expecting an offer in the near future.? If you've been identified as a frontrunner, we might be able to speed up the process for your benefit.??

Also, make sure to check in after interviews. The recruiter will likely circle back after your meetings with our client, but in the event that you don't hear from us shortly afterward, feel free to drop a note or call to share details about the interview and communicate your continued interest in the role (or lack thereof).? Don't be afraid to nudge us. If we haven't yet heard back from the client, we'll give you a good sense of when we expect to circle back for feedback.

Finally, please don't ghost us!? Believe it or not, we have a fair amount of candidates who go missing after interviews.? We prioritize candidates who are both qualified and have a high interest level. Disappearing for long periods of time without returning our messages will cause us to believe that you're not engaged in the opportunity.

The key for both candidates and recruiters is to keep the lines of communication open, with frequent touchpoints.

Again, this also applies to relationships, but that's a different article altogether. ??

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