Getting Unstuck On The Story In Your Mind

Why is it when even you achieve what the public sees (I was on best seller list for over a year) that often you still don’t internalize it as getting it from your head to your heart.

It is what you have work through to re-write the story of our life. It sounds so inspirational to say “Rewrite your story!” but let me tell you it is NOT EASY. Especially when you have responsibilities put upon yourself by yourself and others expecting you to be what they see you as.

I feel that is what we find is that there are core things about ourselves that we find that is considered a strength yet we STOP where we are comfortable because we have the certainty of knowing that even though it is exciting in some way at the same time it is not truly a 3 dimensional view of what could be. Many times we lead with the EGO behind achieving something that serves US purely – making money, being famous, getting self-worth or whatever may be of your particular essence.

I can really relate to this. As I look back on my journals and processing I would waiver between my responsibility of putting money in our bank account and making sure every person under my leadership (that is a loose word as I can truly understand what a serving leader is, and now with clarity I struggled with this most times until my deeper work with John Maxwell and other thought leaders). What is interesting is even in the midst of wavering; writing was a centering point of my life. Because of my ambition and knowledge in this niche I turned the focus of writing business. However, like a flower bulb underneath the soil, green sprouts would always push through as I would gain clarity from a break through or when I was extreme pain. Where did I go in the thick of uncertainty and wanting to heal myself? I went to writing songs and melodies. I went to writing in my journal about how to push through all of it. I went to writing fiction which eventually led to art and photography to TELL a story visually. Not once did I go to the place of EGO. I didn’t go the dwelling of writing my business marketing book. Yes, I enjoyed writing my book. Was I brilliant in this knowledge that I was delivering in my book. Did I feel excited seeing the chapters develop and come to life? Yes, I can say that it was exciting to see a dream become a reality.

It opened many doors for my company and my employees. However during this whole process of writing the marketing book it was purely strategic to help build my name and my career. I am extremely blessed in the success of my first book and I would not change anything about the process as that opened up the true calling on my life.

Maybe that is why my next book perhaps should not be titled about rewriting the story of your life. How to start over and learn the steps that will set you on the path…. (and as I type this maybe it should..) - I say that because again we must keep these things simple for clarity and to put into action. When I have coached other Authors about something that they have learned in a self-discovery process I coach them to give proactively and dig deep for authentic insights about what they may be going through. It is in that insight that provides the steps that YOU used to get you through to the next piece or how you got yourself through that moment.

The challenge rewriting the story of your life is that we all rewrite the story continuously (well we should anyway… some of get STUCK in an old story from the past that no longer serves us, don’t we?)

Like a chapter in a book we have different chapters. If I had been interviewed at 21 when I lost practically everything from financial ruin (yes RUIN and at holding on to that at 22 years old my story would have been different). On the next point If I were interviewed when I was 29 years old I would have had a different story that had been rewritten – designed backed by what I had went through over those years.

Again at 27 years old being one of the first National Speakers for Realtor.com and leading a national sales team to 31 years old starting my company and leading that movement. To again at 37 facing the family secrets in my childhood of sexual abuse, emotional strife, verbal abuse and such which started the awakening within me; to now in my 40’s and realizing success and at the same time realizing that what I was meant to do in my life was there all along. (visit my website at www.TriciaAndreassen.com to look for information on my new book  about the meaning of success coming out this upcoming week)

Does this make sense? Showing how things build and fall apart. Showing how things get sewn together and then get ripped apart in an instant. And when that happens, learning how to pick yourself back up to persevere and not quit no matter how bleak it may seem.

I think that is why the moving unbroken moved me to such emotional release because the story of Louis Zapariny allowed us to view hardship and determination through another lens. Even in his story he found that he rewrote the story of his life multiple times. After the war he came home being known as an imprisoned soldier in terrible concentration camp conditions yet as he settled at home he found that he fought severe PTSD and depression. A new story began to be rewritten when he gave his heart to Christ at a Billy Graham revival. It set the path totally different. My new book coming out next week, which you can get on my website talks about how success is really viewed for each of us and what story does it set for us.

As I reflect on my personal journey in my life and how I moved through challenging and breakthrough moments what was the core beliefs that I needed to have to give me absolute clarity. It was the voice that said, “I don’t care what anyone says, I KNOW WHAT I AM MEANT TO FOLLOW IN MY HEART AND WHAT I WILL NOT WAIVER ON.”

1. I made a commitment to NOT QUIT, PERSEVERING – even if I had to do whatever it took not what was convenient and not what was easy.
2. I had to have COURAGE – I had to find a place deep down within my soul to pull that out of me. No one else could do it for me.
3. I had to SEEK - Look at options that would give me a chance to find another way – whether it was seeking new people in my world, or mentors that was willing to share their insights with me, friends that could love me for who I was at that moment and at the same time I could do for them.
4. I had to have VISION – something – whether it might have been big or small to others standards I keep a GOAL in front of me (I lost my home to foreclosure yet I will buy a home someday I will love. I lost my child to miscarriage yet I know that I will have a family that will be my world someday.) Sometimes it was days of I can’t afford to food in my refrigerator and at the same time KNEW I was meant to be successful.
5. I had to BELIEVE – HAVE FAITH. Know at my core that there was something meant for a bigger reason even if I couldn’t see it – even when all the chips were down I knew I was at my core “UNSTOPPABLE” No matter what, no one would tell me what my life would be; what I would be able to achieve; or what my outcome would be just because of conditions that might have brought me to that point.
6. I had to MAKE DECISIONS– was I going to stay in this place of defeat? Was I going to allow someone to tell me what could be or what could not be? Was I going to let current conditions limit me? Was I going to allow myself to be a victim even though some would easily label that? Was I going to resolve myself to accepting the situation that was in front of me at that that exact moment?
7. I had to TAKE ACTION (no matter how big or small) – Anyone can talk about doing something and talk the good game but if you make a decision and don’t DO something to support the decision then guess what, it is not a decision….it’s an idea. Some actions can be very hard to make. John Maxwell talks about this many times in the 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership. The law of momentum – making decisions with actions that if they are the right ones that they will propel you forward. He also talks about the law of sacrifice. Often actions may take sacrifice – you may have to be willing to lose something. When I divorced from my first husband in my 20’s I still had credit issues from my foreclosures at 21 years old. The car that I had been driving was my fairly upscale car used for real estate as a lease. I sacrificed not getting a car for several months. My parents lent me their baby pink older model Cadillac so that I could have something to get around it. Understand that ACTION many many times takes sacrifice. It could be financially, it could be time, or it could be loss of balance in your life for a period of time. This is WHY you better know if it is worth it for the end result.
8. I had to RELEASE – understand that certain decisions I would make would be right. That some of my actions may not get the result I wanted to for myself. I had to (and still continue to) realize that I couldn’t control what others were doing or even thinking. I had to release that something bigger than me – was in control. I couldn’t take on their energy where it would destroy my belief, my ability to make decisions and interfere with taking the actions that I needed to take.
9. I had to SURRENDER to the process and all that was to be – Since I released that I couldn’t control everything, acceptance of that had to partner with surrender in knowing that somehow, someway it would work out. I would be provided for. For true surrendering you must go back to faith. Faith in your higher power is very comforting in knowing that as a child of God he promises that if you release your EGO of wanting to make things happen and surrender to his will and what is meant to be is what needs to happen. Once I released it (which is very difficult!) I had to surrender to the PROCESS of what was going on.
10. I had to PRACTICE GRATITUDE – A level of thankfulness that brings you to a place where you literally look through a different lens of what is really there to help you, guide you and support you. When we practice gratitude and sincere thankfulness of what is available in this exact moment it puts into prospective of what is really important. If I didn’t practice Gratitude and live in thankfulness, negative energy would have taken hold and that would have spilled over to everything I was working toward as well as destroy any relationship that was meant to be in my life.
?#?YourStoryCanChangeYourLife? ?#?TriciaAndreassen?