Getting through the No’s

“NO” is a pretty common word that can be used for variety of different reasons. For teens - It could be “No you can’t use the car tonight”, “No you can’t go out on a date” or “No you can’t go to that college”. For single people - “No I don’t want to give you my number” or “No I don’t want to date you” and for job seekers - “No I don’t want to hire you”.  It’s not usually stated so candidly although the sentiment of rejection is still the same..  I have found that most people don’t really know how to respond to the “No’s” of life and are often left tending to their wounds instead of picking up and trying again. While the focus for this particular article is how to deal with “No’s” in the job market, the following advice can apply to any area of life where we hear the word “NO”.

In today’s job market the competition is stiff. A colleague of mine who recently moved from his home state to Baltimore shared that upon leaving his job, 700 people applied for the position, 60 applicants had their resumes reviewed, 10 people were interviewed and only 1 person was hired. This means that 699 people were told “NO”.  Can you imagine how they responded to this “Rejection”? Luckily there is hope. You don’t have to “mope” around licking your wounds because there is life during and after the No’s. Here are a few tips to help you get through the No’s of your job search:

1)   Don’t take it personally – remember it’s a business and employers are trying to find the right fit, skill, experience and education for the job.

2)   Feel the pain but don’t stay in it – it’s healthy for you to “mourn” the loss of an opportunity but it’s not healthy for you to stay there. There are thousands of other opportunities that are waiting for you, go after them!

3)   Find the positive in the experience – there is usually a silver lining in each dark cloud, take the time to discover the lesson in your “No” experience.

4)   Remember some of the most memorable people in history were told No: Michael Jordan, Bill Gates, and Walt Disney. After seeing this list, NO might not be so bad huh?

5)   No does not equate to failure – This is probably the most important thing to remember. Just because you were told no, it doesn’t mean that you failed. It simply means you have an opportunity to try again. 

Don’t let the “No’s” of life get you down; remember the tips I mentioned above and you are bound to make a speedy recovery. Besides if you were never told no you wouldn’t know your abilities and your strengths; - it’s often through these experiences that we realize how GREAT we really are! 

Clair Minson is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor and Nationally Certified Counselor in the State of Maryland. She has been providing Career Counseling, Mental Health Support and Therapeutic services to Maryland residents since 2011.