Getting People To Listen To You - Part 1

As coaches, one of the three areas we are involved in is ‘education’. In order to properly guide those we coach, we need to be able to give them the information they need for them to perform at their best. Before they learn what they need to know, they need to be willing to listen.

Our biggest struggle as coaches is to get to people to listen to the education we give. We need to make sure that our clients retain what we teach them. Whether it’s in the form of emails, blogs, posts, seminars or webinars, we need to embed the knowledge into them.

Whatever faith you believe in, it is clear from history and stated in Mark 12:37 that when Jesus spoke, the common people heard him gladly. How great would it be if everyone listened to us ‘gladly’!

How do you make sure that people listen to you with delight? The first essential, crucial ingredient to overcome this frustration, which many of us have, is simply ‘Insight’.

Before we look at ‘Insight’, it is also important for us to look at ourselves. Examine your character, conduct, and concern for others. Ask yourself: ‘Have I earned the right to speak?’

Earning respect

How do you form a connection with someone? When what you say really helps them, you form a connection. You need to reach out to them from a place of understanding, driven by the desire to help them.

You don’t have to know everything to become a resource. You don’t have to know everything to be able to help. However, it’s important to have the desire to learn more. Having awareness of most, if not all, things are also helpful. After all, learning is a lifelong process.

Using what you know, it would be easier for you to help your clients. Knowing a lot of things, however, doesn’t mean you have to be a master of everything. It’s also important to know where you do best. Develop your own areas of expertise. Find out what this is by looking at your strengths and what you are most passionate about.

Knowing your niche differentiates you from others who are doing the same thing as you. You would effectively build your own mountain of value and insight by discovering this for yourself. Finally, you would be able to share this value and insight unconditionally.

Developing insight

You might wonder, is it okay to share everything you know unconditionally? If you want to have insight, you need to have this willingness. Insight is all about letting people know that we care about people and their success. And don’t just make them feel it. Be vocal about it. Tell them that you care!

Earning others’ respect takes time. Respect is not demanded, it must be earned. The way to do this is to create an emotional connection with those you want to educate.

When you create new content, whatever the format is, you need to evoke emotion from your audience.

You can start off by having your ‘Hot Buttons’ or a set of aspirations and problems you have that people can relate to. It makes it easier for your audience to believe that their goals are possible because someone they can relate to has achieved their goals too.

Take time to listen to yourself and list these down.

Benjamin Franklin is one of the most admired figures in history. He is renowned for his wisdom however, he had little formal education. He only attended school for two years. Yes, he was highly respected because of his knowledge and ‘insight’.

Franklin was a keen reader and an intellectually curious man. Even if he didn’t get much of a formal education, his reading habit and curiosity made him an expert in a remarkable number of areas.

Biographer Walter Isaacson called Franklin ‘the most accomplished American of his age and the most influential in inventing the type of society America would become.’

People felt an emotional connection when Franklin shared his wisdom.

I learned some time ago, by being coached, that we as coaches have much to learn from the need for emotional insight and connection. We need to be able to establish that connection with those we coach for them to listen to us.

Take-aways or actions for the reader

• Show you understand. Ensure that every article or lesson that you teach has emotional connection and insight. This lets your listener know that you understand them.
• Review your ‘Hot Buttons’. Ensure that you have a good set of problems and aspirations you can connect with. These are things you can show you have empathy with. Visit www.sterling-coaching.com/coaches to get your Hot Buttons Checklist.
• Listen. Take time to listen. Many coaches find it helpful to speak with prospects and to research on topic areas. These help you build a list of things you connect with.