Get rid of the fear of public speaking

Quite frankly, you are not afraid of speaking in public, you are afraid of yourself, you are afraid of revealing yourself and you are afraid of the unknown response of your audience - that's what you're afraid of.

Yes, everything falls under the umbrella of being afraid of speaking in public, but when we break it down, you are able to face these three main fears, and by facing them, you are able to tap into your inner hero, inner winner, inner power.

So, let's break down each fear so we can understand them and find solutions:

1. First fear: you are afraid of yourself

What does that mean?

Well, it means that, as you have grown up and have gone through life, you stored stories, events and behaviors that you are not necessarily proud of, that you don't want to remember.?

For example, there were times when you were defeated, when you did something silly, when you gave up, when you failed and you’ve put all those events and choices somewhere under a rag and you’ve closed the door of that room and maybe even thrown the key.

The truth is that speaking requires revealing. Speaking without revealing parts of your personality, parts of your stories, parts of you, is not speaking. So, you are afraid of looking for that key, unlocking that door, entering the room and being ok with all the things that are under the rag.?

The solution is to get the ?vacuum” and clean whatever is under the rag, and that’s how we heal and forgive so we can be able to say to the guests - the audience: ”welcome, this is my room, this is my rag, nothing to hide anywhere, this is me”, and people feel welcome in your company, people feel welcomed by your voice, by the purity of your heart, by the clarity of your thoughts - this is how we deal with fear number one.

2. Second fear: the fear of revealing yourself?

Ok, now that we’ve covered the part of being afraid of yourself, let’s talk about the second fear ?the fear of revealing yourself”.

Just think: why should you say that you have been pushed down the stairs by your wife, why should you share that you never graduated from highschool, why should you share any of the things that you haven’t finished or accomplished??

Because society judges them and because you learned to judge them too and that’s how you allow the collective judgment to infiltrare like a virus in your own consciousness, and in doing so, you are allowing the inner judge to have more power over you.

The game changes, your life changes, the life of those listening to you changes when you reconnect with your courage. So take a deep breathe and say ?Alright, let’s do this!'', and then grab a piece of paper and a pen and write down all the experiences that you feel embarrassed and ashamed of. After you write them down, look at them and ponder and try to find smart ways to transform those experiences into valuable leassions, valuable stories that will eventually be medicine for your audience, that will eventually be an invaluable gift for the people you're talking to.

3. Third fear: the fear of the unknown

If public speaking taught me something, it is that in dealing with the fear of the unknown response of your audience, you will learn to deal with the fear of the unknown of life. The next step, the next hour, the next day, the next week, the next month, the next year is not promised to you. We are assuming that we will live a long life, but we can't be sure. We go to sleep knowing that we will wake up in the morning, but we don't know for sure, and so the fear of the unknown is inviting you to play better, dance better in the dance of life.

What I know for sure is that the more you intentionally grow you courage to step again and yet again and yet again in the unknown, the more you will develop the muscle, the mental muscle and the courage to say?

• ?let me see what's there”
• ?let me see what is gonna happen if I speak”
• ?let me see how the audience will react”

And you know what? Very often, not always, the audience wants you to succeed. The audience is coming to listen to you, so that they can learn something new. They want novelty, they want to be inspired, they want to learn about whatever product or event is happening.

The audience is coming there to network with one another, the audience is coming there to deepen their human connection with the people in the audience and with you and finally, the audience is expecting you to lead, to be a captain.?

So, for as long as you do that, they will cherish you, they will give you standing ovation, they will love you, they will remember you and they will be connected with you in that moment in time and forever after.

And this is how you tackle the 3 main fears that we easily call fear of speaking in public.

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