Get Off Your Damn Phone...

Hey You. Yes you, reading this. Hopefully, you're reading this at your desk while you're taking a break from whatever mundane task is driving you partially insane today. Chances are though, you're reading this on the train sitting next to someone who's reading something equally as interesting to them. Or perhaps they are fiddling through their messages or social media updates or repeatedly hitting "No Thanks" to some music app's relentless upgrade requests. Chances are, you're reading this on your phone while sitting at a table outside on your lunch break ignoring the rest of the world. Or you're on an overly crowded elevator with a bunch of people awkwardly trying not to look at one another. The point is, you're reading this... which I truly appreciate... but if you're reading this and you're sitting or standing next to someone, you very well may be missing a golden opportunity to do what you're supposed to be doing on LinkedIn anyway- networking.

You see, social media, as good as it is, has its drawbacks. LinkedIn, by far my favorite social platform, is a great tool when used properly, but far to often it's misused. (Editor's Note: please take heed to the key word in this sentence- properly. LinkedIn is not Facebook. I repeat- NOT Facebook. It is not the place for pictures of your cat or your grandma or your grandma's cat. It is not the place to post memes that have no relevance at all to your professional being. How can I sum this up? Ok, I got it. LinkedIn is not Facebook. Now back to your regularly scheduled programming...)

LinkedIn exists to assist you in expanding your professional network, finding new opportunities and broadening both your general and industry-specific knowledge bases. It's not here to assist you in hiding from the real world while simultaneously allowing you to feel as if you're doing everything you possibly can to network. You see, networking in reality will always be more valuable than networking in "virtual" reality. Meeting someone in person, looking them in the eye, shaking their hand and listening intently to their story will almost always yield a higher dividend than a mere connection request. If it weren't so, why would LinkedIn's creators deem it important for you to select HOW you know someone prior to connecting? Because knowing a person, having interacted with them in some capacity, adds substance to your relationship.

That's not to say that meeting someone only via LinkedIn can't yield the same results; it's just to say that the price of social networking should not be the erosion of networking socially. Yet, we've been complicit in paying that price.

Now I could end this soapbox rant here, but let's end it with a short story of an everyday commuter as an example of how networking in reality works...

There was a guy who commuted everyday by train. There were two commuter train options- one was particularly expensive and fast; the other was particularly inexpensive and slow. This gentleman chose the more expensive option. Every morning he would board the train with hordes of commuters on their way to work. While most of his fellow commuters would rush the doors as they opened, he took a moment everyday to say "how are you" to the conductor as he entered the door to the train. Given he was in a throng of people clamoring to get to their seats, their interactions were always extremely brief. So brief, they couldn't dare be classified as conversations. The conductor would usually reply with something generic like "oh you know" or "it's Friday". When the conductor came through to collect tickets, he would say the same thing to this gentleman that he said to every other passenger, "ticket? thank you." And while all the other passengers would merely brush off the commentary and continue their emails or games of Words With Friends, this gentleman would always give the same reply, "you got it." Eventually, the conductor was reassigned and he and the passenger's brief interactions would come to a conclusion.

Then one day, the gentleman left the office early and boarded a train heading back towards his home. As luck would have it, he fell asleep and missed his stop. The next station was 30-minutes in the opposite direction and it would cost him nearly $100 to get on a train heading back to his stop. Concerned that he'd not only wasted time, but also money, the gentleman decided to wait until he arrived at the next stop to buy a ticket. When he exited the train and began his long, treacherous march towards explaining this to his wife. There standing on the platform waiting for his next shift to begin was his former conductor engaged in a conversation with someone else. "Hey man, haven't seen you on the morning train in a while, did they change your shift?", asked the passenger. "Heyyy, good to see you. They sure did. Wait what are you doing down here? I thought your stop was...?" asked the conductor. The gentleman explained the situation and before he finished, the conductor pointed to a train on the opposite track, told the man not to worry, and shouted to a fellow conductor to allow the man to ride back up.

There are countless scenarios, I'm sure, in which people have gotten a free train ride. It's highly likely that none of them, not even this one, require such an at-length explanation. However, this is less about the train ride, and more about the value of establishing a rapport with real people; the value of human interaction; the value of relationship building- networking. This is about what happens, sometimes, when we put down the damn phone and talk to people.  

So, hey... thanks for reading. When you're done, look at the person next to you and ask them how their day is going. Or perhaps ask them if they've read this or some other article. You might just make a good connection.