Get better results faster by explaining with intention

Hot take: When someone has a hard time understanding something, it's 100% the fault of the person explaining.

When someone has a hard time understanding something, it's 100% the fault of the person explaining. Yes. Hell yes. This is true.

Feel free to fight me in the comments--I'd love to hear about your experiences.

In the meantime, here are a few things I've noticed and some tools I'm leaning on that have brought success. These focus on the topic of explaining something for the purpose of getting work done, whether it's on the job or at home.

When things go south, it's always because:

1. The explainer is giving too little or too much information.

We've all been here--Imagine you're trying to make sense of the first thing someone said to you and decide whether or not you agree with it and they're on idea number 6 already.

They're in a hurry to execute, and as a result they're glazing over details they're forgetting you have no awareness of.

It can be hard to walk back from this, so my personal favorite solution is to share every piece of context I can think of that might be relevant or interesting. Sorry to absolutely everyone, I'm working on it!

2. The explainer is giving the wrong information.

This one's also often urgency-related: the explainer is rushed to get the task done, so they (okay I) take a bet on the "gist" being enough instead of checking their own facts and figures before it's showtime.

But then the numbers don't add up, or the idea conflicts with something else. Cue a fire drill to get back to clarity, potentially disrupting the Tuesday afternoon of several people. Personalized apologies are more appropriate here.

So what do we do about it?

Here's my framework for all communication:

Step 1: Assume you're all on the same team, working toward the same goal

Lots of things culminate in the scenarios described above. One of the main culprits? Assuming you and your audience have different goals and slanting your communication to try and influence them.

You might leave a couple things out, from fear they'll latch on and derail your goals. You might tell only half the story.

I'm not here to nag, just maybe think about the last time you did that and how it went and then re-read numbers 1 and 2 above, will you?

Step 2: Assume no one has context, and don't try to impress

Knock it off with the acronyms, you sound foolish. **Sets reminder to re-read this on Monday before I open my mouth.**

If you let yourself ask one "dumb" question in a group setting you might be amazed to realize that everyone is pretending to understand at least a few things that they feel like they missed the window to ask about.

Take care of those people by building a safe space and your results will show it. I'm literally using the term "understander" in this. Just keep it simple and call things what they are.

Step 3: Focus on ideas the understander already understands, and build ideas on top of one another, starting with the most basic

I was inspired to write this post because when I sat down at my laptop this weekend to search for a ceramics class there was an architecture diagram up on my screen from a past volunteer project.?

I used to think I could never be a real PM because architecture diagrams intimidated me--but when you have the right engineering partner they might as well be an infographic on how to make a peanut butter sandwich.?

And that’s exactly where I’d start if I were explaining one to my family. But then, we add more ingredients, and steps, and dependencies. And then…they’ve conquered one of the biggest fears of my twenties.?

Why does this matter?

For one thing, you're going to save SO MUCH TIME.

But what I love most about this whole explaining with intention thing is that when you help people feel capable, smart, and empowered...magic happens. Better solutions happen, higher energy happens, and you might just change the whole game for someone. Now doesn't that sound fun?

A bonus nugget I’ll offer--

My all time favorite interview question (as an interviewer or an interviewee, for any role) is to ask someone to explain something to me that they understand well and that I may not. It’s a great way to get to know someone, and see how they navigate the most important part of all working relationships!

There you have it, friends--Let me know how this works for you, and what else you've tried!