Geologic Expertise No Longer Thought to be a Rare Commodity

Michael Raines, President, MARs Exploration and Energy, LLC - 10/29/2020

            I have recently discovered, thanks to the valiant shopping efforts, sharp eye, and communication skills of my wife, a little-known corporate secret that explains many of the employment woes affecting geoscientists in 2020.  Until now, I have kept this dark secret to myself, but, after weeks of sitting on this realization, I can no longer hold this information from the world.  As it turns out, this is all a big misunderstanding, based on a false perception in corporate America, and perhaps beyond.  Let me explain.            

Early in the summer this year, my wife stopped in the local mall and swung by our Old Navy? store.  As she was heading to the register to close out her visit, something low on a shelf, half-hidden and pushed to the back, caught her eye.  She instantly recognized the implications of this little item and plucked it off the shelf before it could be whisked away into obscurity by those less aware of its full ramifications.

            This item, likely available to head honchos via the secret “corporate web,” implies to CEOs, HR leaders, and VPs of Operations that geoscientists grow on trees, that they are everywhere, and (in the event that you cannot find one), they can be created basically from scratch, if you just have a readily available human who is at least 3, but preferably 8 years old, or more.  According to the label, anyone could, theoretically, transform themselves into a Geologist, as needed, and do so “Instantly.”  The obvious corporate advantage of this "older human" aspect, then, is that child labor laws need not be violated.

            However, this “Geologist in a Box” claim, as it relates to petroleum, hydrology, geothermal, waste management, mineral resource mining, vulcanology, and oceanography is patently false.  Let us review just a few reasons why.

1. The magic block does tap into the basic thirst for discovery that is inherent in every geoscientist, which drives their curiosity to action.  However, this particular trait also applies to other fields, as well, and is thus, not unique to the geosciences.  Your “little geo” might be more fulfilled as anything from an Astronomer to a Zoologist!

2. The items in the box, while being both:  

a.     very cool, and 

b.     based on geologic materials (petroleum products create the glow-in-the-dark “fossils” and plaster forms the matrix)

...are not naturally occurring.  A true geoscientist loves Earth and nature, but this element is overlooked with “the box” maneuver, which may result in a less dedicated, less passionate employee (see #3, below).

3.     The “fossils” in the box do show the concepts of differential material preservation, and provide excellent examples of casts and molds.  However, the box is “millennialized,” meaning that every sample contains a prize.  In real geology, there is a great deal of work (and sometimes many failed attempts) that go into every discovery or success.  So, perseverance in the face of difficulties (2020, anyone?) is not incorporated into that little box.  Your “instant geologist” may not have the prerequisite patience for the job.

4.     The fauna in the box (at least the one I played with… uhm, I mean “investigated”) are consistent enough for one to consider their theoretical source. However, there are not enough of them to generate statistics to infer the environment of deposition.  Hence, Data Analytics will be missing from your new “Box-Geo.”

5.     Busting chips and chunks from the block is a great introduction to compressive and shear forces.  Likewise, brushing and scraping are windows into erosion, and piles of “talus” on the table (a.k.a. Table Talus) and floor, hint at conservation of mass and sediment dynamics.  However, the full spectrum of deforming forces, faults, folds, plate tectonics, paleo-structure, sediment transport, and stratigraphy (not to mention fluid migration, diagenesis, hydrothermal, geothermal, and vulcanism) will NOT be instilled by this “single phase” experience.  Your new “chip” off of the old geology rock will not have the “Universal Science” experience and understanding you need for real-life situations.

To sum it up, Executives of Enterprise, take heed!  You have been handed a false bill of goods… and you bought it!  “Hook, line, and sinker,” as they say.  The “Instant Geologist” cannot be obtained simply by buying this kit and “just adding water.”  Nor can you give the box to a 3 to 8 year old (or more) human, and expect them to magically transform into the employee you need (while saving money, since you can obviously pay them “entry level” salaries).  Rather, geoscientists are long-lead time, hard-earned, well-educated, valuable assets.  They require years of training, specialized skills, real-life experience, and just the right type of personalities.

So… Geoscientists, don’t be distraught!  Now that we have discovered the misguided, false narratives that our Controllers of Commerce have succumbed to (and its source), we can address the root cause and correct the imprecise elements tainting their perceptions.  YOU have the perfect skill sets for so many applications in a variety of industries!  Petroleum, itself, is still the key to the world's energy needs for decades to come.  It is, overall, much more environmentally friendly than many of our other current options, and you are the key to the practical application of making it even cleaner and more efficient!  So, be courageous, encouraged, and encouraging!  “How can I be encouraging about the petroleum industry in the Year of Covid?” you may ask?  Take the example of this marvelous little kit (one of the few toys that has the word “Geologist” right on the package!), and use it as an inspiration to help someone else.  If you are a well-seasoned professional, find a newer geologist to mentor, as my former boss, Dave Entzminger has done for so many.  If you are still a “YP,” share your experiences with a grad student and show them there is a path forward, like Petroleum Engineer, Yogashri Pradhan did as a speaker for the Members-in-Transition program for AAPG / SPE’s Permian Basin program.  If you are that wise graduate student, find an undergraduate who is struggling with life/study balance, or some technical aspect of a class, and tell them about something that helped you.  If you are that cool undergraduate who loves your geoscience classes, go talk to “the kids back home” at your old school during Earth Science Week (late April).  To paraphrase Dave, who is one of my own mentors, and who went through the mega-crash of the mid-1980s, "you may be selling cars, or insurance, or working retail to make a living, but you ARE still a geologist.  Hold out hope and watch for opportunity to get back into geology!"

In the long run, it is you, the educated, experienced, and/or seasoned geoscientists, who are all needed, and can NOT be instantly replaced by a Geologist in a Box!  So, in the meantime… consider buying (or making your own version of) one of these fun little kits for a FUTURE geologist in your own life!

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All opinions and jokes in this article are mine, and mine alone. They do not necessarily reflect the opinions of any professional or private organizations with which I may be affiliated. According to the label, NPW Gifts (www.npwgifts.com) is the owner of any copyrights or trademarks related to the box in these pictures, and its contents, though similar products are available from other sources. I have no affiliation with any of these products, or with Old Navy, and do not endorse any particular product(s). I am, actually appreciative of having thought-provoking toys such as this on the market, and wish I had thought of it first. The corporate equivalent of a dark web is entirely a work of fiction, so far as I know.