Gaslighting In The Workplace: How To Identify And Take Action

Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse in any relationship, including the workplace. It involves manipulating someone to question their perceptions and reality, leading to feelings of confusion, self-doubt, and even shame. Unfortunately, gaslighting is too common in many workplaces and can seriously affect employees’ mental health and well-being.

If you’re not familiar with gaslighting, here are some examples of workplace gaslighting and how to recognize them:

• Denying your achievements - A gaslighting boss may deny or take credit for your work. They may say, “That project wasn’t successful because of you,” or “I had to step in and fix your mistakes.”
• Blaming you for their mistakes - A gaslighting boss may blame you. They may say, “You didn’t give me the information I needed,” or “You should have known better.”
• Setting unrealistic expectations - A gaslighting boss may set unrealistic expectations that are impossible to meet. They may say, “I expect you to work 60 hours a week,” or “You need to meet this deadline no matter what.”
• Withholding information - A gaslighting boss may withhold important information from you, such as changes in company policies or feedback on your performance. They may say things like, “You don’t need to know about that,” or “I’ll give you feedback when I’m ready.”
• Threatening your job security - A gaslighting boss may jeopardize your job security if you don’t do what they want. They may say, “If you don’t meet this deadline, I’ll have to let you go,” or “If you speak out, you’ll be seen as a troublemaker.”
• Making you doubt your abilities - A gaslighting boss may make you question your abilities by criticizing you constantly or setting you up to fail. They may say, “You’re not cut out for this job,” or “I don’t think you can handle this project.”
• Belittling your concerns - A gaslighting boss may belittle or dismiss them as unimportant. They may say things like, “That’s not a big deal,” or “You’re being too sensitive.”
• Creating a culture of fear - A gaslighting boss may develop a culture of fear where employees are afraid to speak up or challenge authority. They may say things like, “I’m the boss, so you do what I say,” or “Don’t question my decisions.”

If any of these signs of gaslighting resonate with you, it’s important to take action. Here are some steps you can take:

• Document the abuse - Keep a record of any incidents of gaslighting, including dates, times, and what was said or done.
• Seek support - Talk to a trusted colleague, friend, or family member about what’s happening. Consider seeking counselling or therapy to help you cope with the emotional impact of gaslighting.
• Confront the gaslighter - If you feel comfortable, please talk with the gaslighter and explain how their behaviour affects you. Be prepared for them to deny or minimize their behaviour.
• Report the abuse - If the gaslighting is severe or ongoing, consider reporting it to a supervisor, HR representative, or a higher authority.
• Consider leaving - If the gaslighting affects your mental health or well-being, consider leaving the job and finding a healthier work environment.

It’s important to remember that gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse and should not be tolerated in the workplace or elsewhere.