Games, Goals and Gold: Sherlock Holmes and the pursuit of existential answers

“Education never ends, Watson. It is a series of lessons, with the greatest for the last.”

— Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

Dear reader, this week’s newsletter has a different tone than previous editions. I have been studying different topics like a maniac over the last months, partially because I love to, and partially because a part of me always wants to become better at something difficult.

This is also part of the reason why usually my newsletters are full of complex concepts. There is something infinitely alluring to a mind that keeps discovering new possibilities and connections. I would say, to the point, that it enamors itself with its constructs and creations.

This edition of my newsletter was going to be about the concept of “awe” and why we so desperately need it in our lives. My plan was to study awe, collect a few stories, and delve into my own experiences to recollect memories and moments that were reality-shifting for me.

The most interesting thing happened, and I wasn’t even looking for it. I was overwhelmed by awe through an experience seemingly unrelated to all these concepts — the last episode of the Sherlock Holmes series .

SHERLOCK HOLMES

“I’m not a psychopath, I’m a high-functioning sociopath. Do your research.”— Sherlock Holmes

Those who are familiar with Sherlock Holmes know that he is not just an average character. He is different from typical humans in the way he thinks and acts. His unique thought processes, extreme behaviors, severe reactions, and abnormal mental capacities are evident in the literary works of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, popular Sherlock Holmes movies, and many television series.

As described by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Sherlock is the world’s only consulting detective, a profession he invented. He is often consulted by Detective Inspector Greg Lestrade of New Scotland Yard and brings Dr. Watson along on cases, seemingly as much for the company as for his medical expertise. Sherlock is very good at his craft, and possibly a genius of deduction, making himself indispensable to the London police despite his quirks and eccentricities.

He is logical and highly perceptive but possesses very few social skills. It might be that Sherlock thinks more like a criminal than a typical detective. He insults anyone he views as possessing inferior deductive skills, which is everyone.

He once tells Lestrade to shut up, and when Lestrade protests that he hasn’t said anything, Sherlock replies, “You were thinking. It’s annoying.”

Cumberbatch brilliantly portrays this character — cold, detached, highly observant, and capable of capturing minutiae that most human beings wouldn’t notice. He intentionally avoids regular emotions, investing all his mental power in processing information.

“My mind,” he said, “rebels at stagnation. Give me problems, give me work, give me the most abstruse cryptogram or the most intricate analysis, and I am in my own proper atmosphere. I can dispense then with artificial stimulants. But I abhor the dull routine of existence. I crave mental exaltation. That is why I have chosen my own particular profession, or rather created it, for I am the only one in the world.”

This quote perfectly describes how Sherlock behaves throughout the series, as a maniac looking for cases to solve, immersing himself in the most intricate variables as a sport and a necessity for keeping up with his life, or he would succumb to illicit drugs and self-harm.

I’m not going to spoil the plot for you, but I will focus on how this character triggered something in me that was rather profound and humane, which is interesting, considering he often describes himself as not having a heart.

Holmes claims that he is a “high-functioning sociopath,” meaning he believes he has an antisocial personality disorder with a minimal understanding of social norms. He is portrayed as being integrated into society and smarter than most people, and as the series evolves, one slowly realizes that he is as human and relatable as one can be.

WHAT DO WE ALL WANT?

Having coached people from all walks of life, I have observed that most people's goals revolve around more money, more happiness, more influence, more time, a bigger impact, more love, a beautiful body, a circle of loved ones, more experiences, more peace, more confidence, more passion, or a variation of these desires.

However, these are superficial goals. What binds these goals? What are the overarching themes?

The first commonality among all humans is that everyone wants to be loved. We humans are social animals, and with good reason. From our earliest beginnings, being part of a group has been incredibly important to our survival and well-being. Humans depend on each other in countless ways, and we are most likely to thrive as part of some type of community. Everyone wants to be loved, whether it’s by a spouse, partner, child, parent, pet, other relative, friend, colleague, God, or just a kind stranger.

The second characteristic we all share is the desire to feel valued and belong, and this comes in two parts. First, everyone wants their innate worth as a human being to be recognized. You don’t have to do anything, achieve anything, or make anything to have value. You are valuable simply because you exist. The second part is that when we actually do something or contribute in some way to the betterment of others' lives, we want to feel acknowledged.

The third shared hallmark of being human is that everyone wants to achieve something, even if that is just being happy. Achieving is a propelling force that moves us through life in a specific direction. When we achieve something, we keep moving, leveraging the momentum we have gained so far into the next great adventure.

After finishing the Sherlock Holmes series, what struck me was that all the complicated games that criminals devise, the intricate cases Sherlock has to immerse himself in, and the plain complexity of humans interacting with other complex humans (some of them sociopaths) seem to be the unfolding of these three fundamental pillars in infinite combinations and unspoken variations.

GAMES, GOALS AND… GOLD

Here’s a little experiment I did. Let’s look at a list of some goals I have collected from other people over the last few years.

Now, ideate a list of potential goals the character Sherlock Holmes might have for his life.

Could we cluster these goals into categories of topics? Highly debatable, I know. I chose these topics as grouping categories, but it could be any other category.

Our goals may not be what we are really looking for on the surface.

Goals are infinite; one could always have more goals and infinitely want more of something. Most people put their goals on pedestals, thinking that if only they get more of what they want, they will finally be satisfied.

It’s not true.

Once you hit the goal, dopamine is released, you feel great for a while, and then the target moves.

Now, goals can change our lives, give aim to the things we want to accomplish, and they can outline the steps we need to take to achieve our dreams. The target gives you something to aim at, a motive to challenge your skills, a measure of progress, and something that gives all of your effort some purpose. To live a fulfilling life, it is essential to have goals and to move in the direction of obtaining them.

I have multiple goals for my life, ranging from pursuing a PhD in Psychology (by the way, I just got admitted into a psychology degree at the university!), marrying a spiritually equal man, having more kids, serving this planet, helping thousands of people live their best lives, writing books, expanding my body of work and knowledge, discovering new things, being financially free, creating an eccentric lush life, building an unconventional school for extraordinary kids, and I could go on and on and on...

These desires are real and pulsate in my veins every day.

And as I project my consciousness towards the end of my life, I know these pursuits are ramifications that will be fundamentally trying to answer these questions:

“Was I loved?” — “Did I belong?” — “Did I matter?”

I have seen this in my coaching practice multiple times — when people are brave enough to dig into their deepest goals, they almost always find existential questions. These questions may be buried deep under a life of learned behaviors and assumptions.

Some questions burn when spoken out loud. Digging is a process of stripping naked.

It takes courage and boldness to be the best you can become in this lifetime. It is the only way. And the most rewarding.

When you are brave to ask the questions that connect you with your life story, you make space to embody the mission you came here to deliver.

Goals are golden nudges that put you on your way to becoming your highest potential, your supreme destiny in this lifetime. It’s not the goal you are after, really; it is the person you become as a consequence of pursuing it. You’re after the gold.

And that is also the reason why the target keeps moving. And why the game never ends.

“ALL LIVES END, ALL HEARTS ARE BROKEN”

Throughout the series of Sherlock, Mycroft Holmes reminds his younger brother, Sherlock, of the disadvantages associated with emotions on numerous occasions. Sherlock seems both heartless and prone to wearing his heart on his sleeve throughout the show, much to Mycroft's disapproval. Whereas Sherlock seems to struggle to connect to the rest of humanity, Mycroft values keeping an emotional distance from people in general.

The interplay of seeming coldness and detachment from the Holmes brothers, contrasted with the effervescent crescendo of the humanity they demonstrate as the show unfolds, is both unsettling and deeply moving. As with all things meaningful, the final message of the show is one related to existential questions.

The last episode of the series puts the viewer through a series of psychological games where the bully (I won’t disclose the full plot in case you are still going to watch it) seems to take pleasure in seemingly absurd trials. On the surface, the games appear random and abhorrent, with the underlying theme being psychological terror designed to test Sherlock’s emotional bandwidth.

These games are so terrifying and abhorrent because they are driven by the bully’s belief that nothing matters, stemming from their profound sense of loneliness and isolation. This psychosis subverts any structured system of values, leaving one questioning whether it’s possible to live in a reality where nothing is meaningful and everything is random.

The absence of meaning renders everything absurd, arbitrary, and pointless. This absence of meaning, and the consequential absurdity and horror of existence, is alluded to by the “final game.” The final game presents a fundamental existential problem: the terror of being alone in a meaningless world.

"Do I matter? — "Am I lovable?" — "Do I belong?"

Circling back to the fundamental questions we are all, on some level, trying to answer, what connects us as human beings is profound and ancient. Whoever we put on a pedestal or condemn is, in their own journey, trying to solve the same problems of being human. There is no escaping it.

We are fragile creatures that need to belong, to be valued for who we are, and to be loved, amongst other complex needs. The smarter we are, the more our minds can trick us into believing our grandiose plans and games will save us from the profound and cutting pain of the possibility of feeling that we might not belong, that we might be invisible, unlovable, unworthy, and alone.

So we try to escape by all means.

It is by becoming fully human that we transcend humanity itself. And know that, as much as it weighs on our frail human existence, the life force that moves us is infinitely more powerful and miraculous than our little egos could ever understand.

All fundamental questions are questions of the Soul.

And everything you ever wanted through your goals and games was the gold of it.

If you don’t believe in religion, God, the Soul, or the Universe, do you believe there is such a thing as the sacred? Because if you do, that is a religious belief.

The sacred dimension of life is what gives it meaning: the ineffable rapture of looking your beloved in their eyes and merging with the infinite; witnessing your children grow; receiving the pristine smile of someone you helped; or playing the violin to reach the depth of someone’s soul and connect to that which binds us all.

The gold.

WORK WITH ME

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The journey to becoming intimate with your Soul’s deepest gold requires courage, commitment, and a willingness to navigate the complexities of your psyche with intention and insight. I’m your coach, guide, and host, and I can’t wait to have you in if this is calling your Soul.

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