The 'game changing' approach to reducing stress

In September I ran a successful pilot programme to help reduce stress, it was part of my MSc Psychology Thesis and the participants were female entrepreneurs. Sarah Dixon from Boundless Business Development was an attendee and she kindly wrote this blog describing the impact that it has had on her. Following the impact that the programme had I will be offering this programme as a fresh approach to reducing stress in organisations and privately to groups of entrepreneurs, so do contact me if you'd like to know more.

I know I’m far from alone in finding recent years very trying. A recent study found that stress levels in women were at a 10-year high – something I know from experience. I’m a lone parent to two kids with long-term health conditions, and I’ve recently set up my own business to try and ease some of the pressures that brings. I’ve lived in a state of stress for so long, I thought it was normal to wear your shoulders as earrings, but Andrea Morrison showed me a different way.

I’ve known Andrea for a few years now. We’d met at networking events and I’d followed her on social media. I knew that she was a different kind of business coach, with her support underpinned by psychological principals. Working with her was on my business wish list, which is why I jumped at the chance to take part in her MSc Study, ‘Reducing Stress in Female Entrepreneurs’.

Like many people, I’ve tried lots of different approaches to managing stress. Meditation, mindfulness, Me Time. Although some of it helps in the short term, the demands of life just ramp the stress levels back up so it feels like you’re just bailing out a boat rather than fixing the leak. That leads to wishful thinking; if only I had more income, won the lottery, or met a millionaire who adored me.

What I learned over the course of the study was something very different. Ideas so simple that you almost want to say, ‘Well duh!’ but you’re so busy sitting there feeling stunned at how much time and energy you’ve given away unnecessarily.

For example, Andrea explained that our thoughts created our experience, and gave us an exercise to do in a break; find something unpleasant to do and approach it neutrally. I chose to empty the kitchen bin. It’s a horrible job anyway but my teenager had piled the contents of her bedroom on top meaning I had to play an odorous game of Jenga to get the rubbish outside. I’d been putting it off.

I took some time to banish all the preconceptions of how horrible the job was going to be, and all the frustration at the over-filling, and when I was feeling neutral I got to work. As I dismantled my teens leftovers, it brought up memories of a conversation we’d had the night before that left me smiling as I carried the waste outside and threw it into the black bin. It took all of two minutes, giving me plenty of time to wash my hands, make a coffee, and get back to the training with a smile in place.

The thing that has stayed with me the most is the idea that thoughts area like buses; you don’t have to get on them. When my mind starts to fill up with fear, anger, or just gets too busy I say to myself ‘No need to get on board the crazy train’ (which is my version of Andrea’s much gentler bus analogy) and I feel that I have control over my thoughts again; and with that comes decreased stress.

It isn’t a quick fix. The lessons that Andrea shared take practice, but they really pay off. If I’d written this blog post even a week after I probably would have started it by telling you how broken I was how I had ADHD and anxiety and depression. What I learned was that I am not broken – no one is. Regardless of the challenges that I face (and we all have our own) I can choose how I respond to them.

Three months down the line, I’m calmer. I see things more clearly. I still hop on the crazy train sometimes, but when I do I can quickly realise what I’m doing and get off at the next stop. When challenges come my way, I don’t flinch like I used to, I don’t feel punch-drunk from life. I feel quietly confident, capable, and above all, peaceful.

Andrea’s program has been a game changer for me and my business. If you get the chance to work with her, I would highly recommend it.