The Game called Winning

The one who was born a genius can't win against the one who tries;

The one who tries can't win against the one who enjoys – Confucius

In his wisdom, Confucius possibly knew that there is nothing like an absolute winner. I got this epiphany during a board game with my son. When I cried foul at his tactics, my son retorted that fair play doesn’t get him winning brownies. I suddenly realized how focused we are on the end game of winning. Though this focus has led to innovations on one hand, it can also lead to tendencies to rig the gig and to manipulate. 

So, a fundamental question arises, “What is this ‘winning’ all about?”

 Is winning just a desired outcome, or an end-position, and can it be confined to a literal definition?

 And as leaders, while playing this game called winning, to what extent can we drive ourselves and our teams?

I was forced to reflect on the above when an overworked friend confided that she was caught up in performing ‘due diligence’ on a project again because her colleague felt the deal was not structured fairly. The situation threw open the insight that a reckless pursuit of ‘winning’ could guzzle up resources, cause leadership burnout and ultimately undermine organizational growth.

This reminded me of a verse from a religious text, the translation of which is, “We do not know what is better for us - whether we conquer them or they conquer us; those sons of my enemy, whom by slaying we would not desire to live”.  The verse aptly captures the undertone that a literal ‘winning’ position may not be the best outcome for the greater good after all.

So how do we distinguish, if ‘winning’ is in the best interest? How do we define a ‘win’ in a fuzzy situation?

Here are a few distinctions that have helped in maintaining sanity while chasing a win -

1) A winner is not someone who has just reached a desirable outcome. Winning is a journey that one undertakes to reach the desired potential, which in turn unlocks the door to personal excellence. The external outcome is just the manifestation of the internal changes that one goes through in that quest. A case in point is a narrative by a colleague who was selling personal computers in formative years. The potential buyer, who was the business owner, exhibited a tendency to mistrust his employees and not delegate the purchase decision. My colleague had the opportunity to pitch an e-learning platform to the same gentleman after few years; and remembering the buyers past attitude, tried to appease him. To his surprise the gentleman mentioned that all interaction should be done with his team as they were empowered to make final decisions. The incident portrayed how a change in his perception as a business leader, led his organization to reap huge benefits in the form of becoming a market leader and a multi-million dollar corporation. 

2)Winning is a game. Like all games, it starts and ends; you win some and you lose some. I think what is important is to know if the game is exciting and rejuvenating for you.  It may be difficult to cut through the cacophony and to keep your focus on what energizes you. Tom Peters, in his book, Good to Great talks about how Wells Fargo became one of the most valued banks on the Wall Street. And, it just started with their ability to define what game they wanted to play, irrespective of how they were earlier operating like a mediocre Global Bank. Evaluating if it’s a game one would like to play, and if the cost of playing that game is in alignment with one’s personal values – is the key to a desirable win.

3)Adulation associated with winning is momentary. Even though the reality is that a pugilist winning a bout gets the crowd’s cheer, while a loser nurses his or her bruises in isolation. We learn to crave the adulation that comes with winning so much, that we often lose focus on the way. While visualization of success is a powerful technique that helps you to keep working towards the goal, most often the emphasis that is placed on achieving the end-point outweighs the advantages of the process. This is the reason we see athletes using unfair practices like doping to get there. We have seen allegations of Tiger Wood doping recently, and even a seven-time Tour De France winner Lance Armstrong falling to the attraction of adulation.

So, does this mean that we do not go after winning?

 Absolutely not!!

Being a Seller I need to be winning accounts regularly. Here are five steps that I use, with proven success in sales situations, but they tend to do well in any situation – personal or professional.

1. Have I defined winning correctly? Have I evaluated all the Possibilities, Assumptions and Truths to arrive at a winning Hypothesis?

2. Have I a clear perception of the process that will achieve me a win – dynamics, drivers, resources?

3. Will the process lead me to self-rejuvenation? Is it a game I will love playing?

4. In case I do not end up winning, will the process lead me to a higher order of learning and growth?

Winning is a natural phenomenon, as natural as life itself. What one needs to be reminded of is that being too focused on the end alone may undermine growth opportunities and take out all the fun of the process. The ‘doing’ is far more worthwhile than just the destination.Here is to your journey of success. “Keep Winning”.