The Full Body Experience - This Coach's Perspective

723 words 3 minutes?

I sit in a very privileged position. I have a seat at the table to witness a leader or organization shift and transform.? I don’t take this lightly.?

This doesn’t happen overnight.? Quite the opposite. Sustained personal or organizational transformation is an evolving and fluid process.?

To say that my clients change and transform me would be an understatement.??

One of the unspoken perks to the work I do is that as my clients evolve and transform, so do I.?

Last week was one of those weeks. At least that is what my body said to me.?

It was no coincidence that each of my coaching sessions gravitated towards “Active Listening.”

?I’m sure you’ve heard or read about “Active Listening.”? It’s a go to phrase when talking about leadership qualities and characteristics. ?Frequently highlighted as a goal or objective in coaching engagements.

?“Improve Active Listening Skills”.??

THE BASICS: In our fast-paced world. Listening can often be superficial, even with our best intentions. Active listening occurs at 3 levels;

• Level 1- YOU: Internal listening. Attention focused on your internal thoughts, feelings, interpretation, problem solving, responding.??
• Level 2- THEM: Intensely listening to others. Laser like focus on the person you are listening too. Not just what is being said.? What is not being said. Body language, gestures, expressions. Even tone of voice.
• Level 3 GLOBAL: This encompasses everything around you.? It’s a soft receptive focus, which includes all your senses and environment.? This is where you begin to access your intuition…IN YOUR BODY.

Coaching Question: What levels of listening are you already powerful at??

A NEW TWIST: ”Body Listening,” emphasizes the importance of tuning into signals and messages that our bodies send.?This might seem natural or intuitive when we exercise or workout. Right! We listen to what our bodies are saying. It’s almost automatic

• As a leader…not so much.? Cognitive tasks, problem solving, strategic thinking, stress and a fast paced life will overshadow body awareness.
• The idea is that our bodies are rich with wisdom and by listening to them we can make better decisions, improve our relationships, and become more effective leaders.? ? ? ??

DIGGING DEEPER:?Level 3 listening begins in the body. Imagine a small antenna where you focus on your surroundings or the energy in the room.

• What’s the vibe? ?What’s unspoken? What do you notice outside of your cognitive thoughts?...Tune into that and nothing else. Don’t attach to anything.? Just notice.

"Gut" Speak – Intuition is accessed through your gut.? Your gut is one of the Five Knowledge Centers We’ve all experienced our instincts screaming at us.?

• Usually as a warning or a “survival” instinct based on past experience or preconceived knowledge.
• Consciously tuning into your “gut” can shift your perspective or give yourself permission and space to explore what you’re feeling.?

As a coach this might show up as “I’m making up a story that you…. Or simply, “my gut tells me there is something else at play here. “Either way this creates space for me to go deeper with my client and get well beneath Level 1 listening.?

Heart Talk - When the heart and gut are trained together, it’s a powerful combination.????????????

…The heart Is where your EQ lives. Igniting empathy, compassion, vulnerability and your ability to connect with your team and create a supportive culture.????????????

…I’ve learned when a leader gets comfortable with listening at Level 2, the Heart Knowledge Center begins to open.? Curiosity ensues, as does innovation, problem solving and a willingness to ask for help.?

The Rest of the Story – Active Listening (as a real action) and using your body to listen is a new language for leadership.??

Last week all of my clients stepped into this new territory.? Some with ease, others with the discomfort that always precedes any sustainable change. I asked each one of them to go out into their worlds and simply start to train their Level 2 and 3 Active Listening muscle.????????????

The connection…As they each became intentional and settled into our session, I went into a “Zone”.? For the first time my mind, body and all of my knowledge centers came together at the same time.? Levels 2 and 3 were on fire. There was a palpable energy in Zoom world.????????????

I experienced all of them in ways I never had before.? Their self- compassion, empathy,?intentionality, and action. My "GUT" told me they were experiencing the same thing.

Unknowingly, they were making me a better coach.?

I am so grateful to my clients. You are remarkable leaders who bring your full self to everything you do.

You are my WHY.?

To Be Continued?

Ron??????????????