Fulfillment and Coaching

  Having a fulfilled life is very motivating . Usually clients come to coaching in order to have more fulfilling life . It is very vital to define the term “Fulfillment “ in order to practice co-active coaching . Fulfilling life is an on-going process so it can’t be attain through accomplishing a certain objective or possessing a certain item . Fulfilling life is like a paradox “ having fulfillment life is like trying bottling day light” ( co-active coaching). Furthermore, to be fulfilled or having a fulfilled life is not related with feeling good. Sometimes people feel fulfilled when life is not that easy and full of challenges. When life is difficult and has many challenges the person feels that he or she posses a purpose and mission in his or her life . Actually , this is one of the meanings to be fulfilled or having a fulfilled life . The paradox that is mentioned above reflects the notion that fulfillment can be feeling inner peace during experiencing outer struggle in the outer world. Moreover , fulfillment is related to values. Living a life that reflects the values of the person is adhering can be considered as a fulfilling life. So helping the client to clarify his or her own values in order to decide life routes to have fulfilling life . Also this clarification of client’s values will be essential in order to be aware about what is important and not important to their lives . In addition , values are not principles or morals . Values don’t t mean having an ethical trait or behavior . “ values are the qualities of a life lived fully from inside out “ (co-active coaching). Usually dissonance takes place when one is living his or her life without the values that make the sense of fulfillment .

  Based on Co-active Coaching book , working on 5 steps which are perspectives , choice , co-active strategy , commitment and action are considered a formula for balance coaching. First step is perspectives . It is human nature when we experience one or two experiences with unpleasant results we unconsciously form a perspective , assumptions and expectations that hinders our capabilities through out a habitual way of thinking . So, balance coaching starts with identifying client’s perspective towards a challenge or an action in order to expand this perspective with more enabling , creative and resourceful ways. If the coach didn’t identify the negative perspective , it would be very hard to reinforce the client with conditions of change.  

Nevertheless, one powerful tool for identifying and generating perspectives is changing frames. Also , the coach can generate client’s perspectives through asking “ what is another way of looking at this that would work for you?” (co-active coaching book). Second step in the formula of balance coaching is choice. Identifying and generating perspectives is close to exploring the rich territory in each land of the geographic land. Here the choice is more deeper than just selecting one perspective . The choice represents the power of choice that represents the client as “ Agents of personal change-absolutely , in charge of their choices’(co-active coaching book). The third step is co-active strategy. This step can be considered as a bridge between awareness and action. This strategy includes attitude and emotional state that are capable of motivating and supporting the needed action. Nevertheless, this step includes brainstorming about options and notions to achieve the needed objective . Brainstorming is extremely essential in order to be assured that these options and notions are coming from alive place. What matters here not to have a creative conversation with the client but what matters that the coach encourage the client to go beyond his or her boundaries . The coach also should be aware of “OOPS”. Overly Optimistic Planing Syndrome is not attainable nor realistic method of planning . It occurs as the client’s energy is up . But in the realistic world this way of planing is very hard to be translated to promising actions. Therefore, narrowing down the choices and options will be crucial to avoid “OOPS”. Fourth step in balance coaching is commitment. This step enhance the client to stick to his or her plans . It protects the client from returning back to old beliefs and ways of thinking that limit his or her capabilities . Commitment is capable of letting the client to take control of his or her life. Consequently, It is crucial to let the client committed to their plans before inviting them to take a certain action . Moreover , letting the client to discover and explore about what things he or she will say yes and no is vital in order to gain sustainability over time and change . Simply , saying yes to their plans and saying no to old beliefs and expectations. 

Furthermore, Coaching fulfillment aims to help the client to have a clearer picture of a fulfilling life. Fulfillment is personal and evolving so what makes the client sparks 25 years ago differs from now. So, coaching fulfillment aims to allow the client to be capable of possessing a crystal clear map towards a fulfilling life. One method for coaching fulfillment is measuring the client’s level of satisfaction. This measurement can be reached through the practice of wheel of life . This practice will help the client to visualize what aspects of his or her life are fulfilled and other aspects still unfulfilled . In addition , another method to help the client to have fulfilling life is the formulation of life purpose statement . This method will help the client to focus on short and long term actions that can lead to a fully lived , expressed and fulfilling life. Formulation of life purpose statement has a great positive impact on possessing effective self discovery , values clarification and vision . The coach’s role to acknowledge the client when he takes an action that clarifies his or her own values . And also , the coach should acknowledge the client when making a harsh decision that honors his or her own values :rather than ,choosing an easy action that doesn’t give the needed life the valued purpose the client wants to attain . Last but not least , the coach’s role is to champion and challenge the client to have a fulfilling life.  

Consequently, Balance is one of the core principles in the co-active model .Balance can defined as choosing an action oriented life aligned with a compelling vision . Balance is considered for clients as choosing a life rather than just only reacting to circumstances and external factors. Balance takes place in the quality of life and the day to day experiences . Moreover, balance coaching plays a dynamic role in changing the client’s perspective towards specific actions or situations. The formulation of new action is not the starting point in balance coaching . The initial point in balance coaching is to change client’s perspectives towards actions and challenges .