From Work-Life Balance to Life Integration: 4 Strategies Toward Gender Equity at Home
Dr. Regina F. Lark, Ph.D., CPO?
Professional Organizing Estate Clearing & Sales Senior Moves & Downsizing | The Original Brain-Hacking Entrepreneur, Author, ADHD Specialist, Productivity Consultant
Recently I’ve had conversations with women lawyers about so-called “work-life balance.”
Here are some sound bytes:
Cecelia, Jennifer and Lily are smart and accomplished. One was managing editor of Law Review, one made partner in an all-male firm, and just before Lily left her firm, she settled a multi-million claim favoring her client. These women are bad-ass. They carry the bulk of the physical and emotional labor at home. They are on edge, tired, and pissed-off. And they have a lot to do. Always.
Maybe I’m too literal because I’m not quite sure of the meaning of “work-life balance.” First the words “work” and “life,” as if one is so separate from the other. Doesn’t “life” contain a lot of work? Isn’t work a big part of life?
And don’t get me started on the word “balance.” Have you ever tried to balance something? It takes patience, insight, mindfulness, and, well a lot of work, to get to balance. Attempting to ‘balance’ anything within the messiness of life is, I think, asking a lot. The 24/7 ‘to do’ list is not going away (or checked-off!) any time soon, but we need strategies to reign in the volume of work and associated resentments.
I’ve come to replace the word “balance” with “integrate” because that is exactly what I’m trying to do. I want to integrate into my life all the things that matter to me, with all the components of what is available to me.
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Cecelia, Jennifer and Lily all live with husbands and children. They expressed satisfaction with, and a great deal of love for, their families. What they crave are different conversations about how to find that integration. What I told them is that one can achieve life integration once the family embraces a desire for gender equity at home.
Toward Gender Equity
It’s time to think and talk differently about what household management actually looks like, and how to make the changes you and your partner wish to incorporate into your daily practice at home. Here are four strategies.
Discovering ways to integrate it all: paid/unpaid work, family/friend time, play, and self-care chores (unpaid work!) is a process, and some days it feels like a slog. As with anything worth having, work toward change comes as quickly or as slowly as you seek to implement. A willingness to change, to grow, to establish greater harmony, and love the environment in which you live will make the idea and practice of gender equity a viable part of life at home.
Regina F. Lark, Ph.D.
Very informative! Thank you !
Talent, Organizational Culture and Effectiveness Consultant| Coach | Speaker
3 个月Thanks for using your many talents, Regina, to bring this conversation to the forefront. Can't wait to check out Maple.
Validational Speaker at Carmel Rivello Productions
4 个月BrAVO, REgina!!!!so very special!!!!