From the streets to an aspiring commodity trader - Dheeraj Rai

These are photos taken of me in 2006 / 2007 when I commenced my career in the international commodities trading industry. It was taken during a 2 years overseas stint in Latin America, predominantly in Ecuador and Panama. I was fresh out of my conscripted military service in Singapore and an opportunity came up to work in Latin America. In all honesty when I decided to take the opportunity, it was more out of curiosity in exploring the Reggae-ton clubbing scene and culture of Latin America, and obviously the interesting remuneration I was assured of. The remuneration I received will always be something I am grateful for as it came in extremely handy when I was homeless for 2 years in Singapore; from 2011 to 2012. To avoid any cultural miscommunication given that this article may reach individuals from various geographical continents; my personal experience of homelessness in Singapore means that due to certain unforeseen circumstances I was forced to provide for myself all the necessities of life without any prior notice. 

Nevertheless, despite the tough and demanding conditions such as the extremely long working hours, exclusively high-temperature outdoor working environments and language barrier where Spanish was the only medium of communication in the ghettos of Latin America, I ended up falling in love with the commodities trading industry. I discovered my true passion and calling which was and is still to be a commodities trader. Thus, a mere experiment of taking up an opportunity to work in Latin America coupled with a deep resentment which was accompanied by an underlying fear that I from a first world country like Singapore will fail miserably under such working conditions ended up in me finding my career ambitions.

I wanted to prove and show my doubters that they could put me down as much as possible but come what may I will complete my 2 years Latin America stint. This mentality in me to prove specific individuals or cliques from the big house society who degrade and put me down is largely derived from my idol since my teenage years; Eminem. The lyrics of the songs from Eminem and his personal and professional experiences, strength and hope are something which I so strongly correlate to especially on the struggles early in his career where he had already been condemned to be a failure even before he started and his introverted traits which are utilized by some to ridicule and humiliate him. The way he utilizes all the justified hate, pain and suffering he has had to endure into the craft of the art form he faithfully loves is truly inspirational and a source of motivation to me during my hard times.

Nevertheless, more than a decade since my initiation into the commodities industry I have faced countless adversities and achievements which has instilled faith and belief in myself that the works I have placed in my art will not die in vain. I have even gone back to school and achieved a first-class honors business degree after being made redundant by my former employer in 2017. I have worked in many commodity trading organizations and held a variety of roles but still am searching ideally for a commodity trader role of where I can work under the mentor-ship of a senior trader in the industry. These variety of roles includes both manual and clerical jobs after my Latin America stint to learn and understand as much as possible of the entire trade and logistics spectrum of the containerized and dry bulk commodities industry. As a Singapore citizen, I have worked overseas in Latin America for 2 years and in addition over a span of approximately 8 years in newly set up trading companies, small / medium sized and multinational trading organizations based in Singapore (ASIA) whilst simultaneously working across different time zones (EMEA and Americas).

I had never intended to take a degree due to my unfavorable results and experiences in my adolescent schooling days where upon reflection was due to my unruly headstrong mentality. However, it was in the face of an adversity when I was made redundant in my job which pushed me to take up this business degree. It is beyond any reasonable doubt that there were specific individuals who had motivated me to accomplish this milestone in the form of a first-class honors business degree. However, time has indeed revealed some but not all of these specific individuals to be dressed as an innocent sheep in wolf's clothing whose primary agenda is to exploit in the form of obtaining self-proclaimed power and prestige in the big house country club society. I had worked various odd jobs such as a kitchen runner to finance the expenses of my business degree. Due to my introverted nature, I had decided to keep everything low key but have had to endure criticism and humiliation that I am publicly soliciting for funds and assistance by doing nothing about my situation and breaking a simple set of axioms of which, I am grateful and blessed for.

These simple set of axioms yet difficult at times was granted to me through a gift of desperation approximately 4 years ago. There is a certain degree of justified resentment, pain and hurt when my character is assassinated in such a venomous manner. However, it has taught me there are going to be certain unspoken hierarchical norms and double standards in society which has already been embedded way before my time. These unspoken hierarchical standards are easily shrouded in simple grey manipulative tinted terminologies by individuals who have a primary desire to exploit and accumulate power, prestige and recognition by twisting and turning a simple set of axioms to make me look like a loose cannon who is dumb and retarded. Thereafter, these individuals in a specific sadistic maneuver enforce me to believe and admit that every single experience, strength and hope I faced, know and knew about life is warped and utter rubbish. This is to ensure that I sit in the corner of a room with my hands, legs bonded, mouth sealed shut where I can merely look out of the window and pray for the courage to be freed from these shackles of slavery.

From a personal perspective there has been lots of fear when walking away from such pretentious individuals with nefarious intentions as I can be sentenced by others without a trial for being disloyal, ungrateful over the very simple set of axioms I was bestowed and blessed upon. However, despite the agony of financial insecurity, injustice suffered whilst being cornered to be literally spitted and humiliated at in my hard times, I must say that the opinion of others about me is secondary. It is best that I walk away from such individuals so that my sanity is restored. I have been of great service by being a doormat in the big house society but there is a thin line between loyalty and slavery. I decide not to choose the latter and be powerless where my life becomes unmanageable as it was approximately 4 years ago. I trust that to be strategically enforced to hand over the base I had religiously worked days and nights for slightly more than over a year whilst enduring sleep deprivation incorporated with emotional and mental manipulation and thereafter being disposed of without notice is in hindsight a blessing in disguise.

In addition, to maliciously have the craft placed in my art referenced as gibberish to prospective favorable circumstances has been a great character-building exercise and after all this is not the first such experience, I have had to face. I am extremely blessed and grateful that there has been simple tools I could utilize and not have to turn to my old solution which would have been a perfect antidote to numb myself. There is undoubtedly a self-seeking agenda from my end when I place countless hours of craft and sacrifice in my art which is ultimately to get the due recognition and achieve my ideal career aspiration. I am no saint and thus, mention self-seeking as there are financial, family obligations I need to fulfill and dreams I aspire to live and turn into reality. As an extremely introverted individual I have been very honest to personal and professional associates of whom I have a rapport with on what are my ideal career aspirations. However, specific members of the big house country club society armored with a great sense of entitlement and discrimination have publicly assassinated and labeled me with exaggerated career ambitions. This is despite the fact when I have honestly mentioned in a closed setting which is optimal for an introverted individual like myself that the mecca of my career aspiration is to be a commodities trader. Nevertheless, I have this firm faith that if I have been honest in my dealings the works will pay off which was, is and still to be a commodities trader.

The agenda of this article is to solicit for assistance in getting back into the commodities trading industry. The reason simply being that I have tried applying for operations roles in various commodities trading organizations while juggling studies and various ad-hoc jobs, but the results has been unsuccessful. I am perfectly fine with a trade operations role of which I have done numerous times in order to utilize the opportunity to prove my competency to be a commodity trader. I have placed more than a decade of blood, sweat and tears into the commodities trading industry which I am passionate about. I am very certain of what I want which is to be a commodity trader, but I will most definitely need the mentor-ship and guidance of an experienced trader. More than a decade since my Latin America stint, the hunger and desire is still entrenched in me like a wildfire to achieve my ideal career aspiration which is to be a commodity trader. Hence, an opportunity to be mentored by someone more senior than me in the commodities trading industry of where I can also be of value to will be ideal. Furthermore, I have written a 10,000-word professional project for my degree where 5,000 words is written critically analyzing my learning style and correlating it to my career choice to be a commodity trader. The balance 5,000 words is critically written in the manner of a through researched literature review titled as below:      

"Key organizational challenges faced by global virtual teams in the commodities trading sector of Singapore"    

This 10,000-word professional project can be provided upon request to any prospective employer or mentor in the commodities trading industry who is willing to give me an opportunity to meet them and elaborate more in detail about my professional experiences.

Although the main agenda of this article is to get back into the commodities industry, I would like to take this opportunity to express my gratitude to some specific former associates whom I have worked with. I have been blessed and fortunate to have worked with some incredible senior and junior associates in my professional career who have accepted and mentored me despite my shortcomings. They had not utilized their position or power to micro-manage me but instead patiently empowered and mentored me at times with hard love when I was drifting off the ideal path to execute the tasks assigned to me. In the turbulent times of my professional career they had assisted and mentored me strategically to execute insurmountable tasks thrust upon me due to vested propagandized interests. If there are any grievances I have on my professional experience with them, it would be none other than the time I worked with them was simply too short for my liking but then again circumstances were such that my journey with them was forced to come to an abrupt end. Their mentor-ship and guidance despite being 10,000 plus miles away from me or beside me in the office would be something I will never forget. It was in those turbulent times where I was exhausted, beaten and wanted to give up but somehow manage to find some kind of inexplicable persistence and strength to execute such insurmountable tasks. They may not realize it but their words and guidance played a significant impact on me which was vital in the execution of the insurmountable tasks thrust upon me. At the bottom of the article is an video of not an exact but the best way I can replicate of the words they used to increase the self-belief in myself when I had to execute such insurmountable tasks thrust upon me; although there are many words in the video I correlate to personally and professionally, below are the specific words I would like to highlight ("Al Pacino best speech - Any Given Sunday - 1080p HD", 2015) :

''On this team, we fight for that inch

On this team, we tear ourselves, and everyone around us to pieces for that inch.

We claw with our finger nails for that inch.

Cause we know when we add up all those inches

that's going to make the fxxxing difference

between WINNING and LOSING

between LIVING and DYING."

There is also a video of my another idol Zlatan Ibrahimovi? at the bottom of this article which I immensely look for inspiration and motivation for (Hemsey, 2017). Despite the struggles he has had to go through it certainly stimulates me that it is possible for anyone to reach their career aspirations despite of whatever background they come from and any degrading criticism or circumstances thrust upon them.

I am no prodigy like Eminem or Zlatan Ibrahimovi? who are massively talented in their craft, but I certainly understand the amount of hard work they place in their art of which they are passionate about. They have had mentors at respective stages of their professional and in some instance’s personal lives as well. Similarly, I hope to be able to work with one in the same note as well.

In conclusion, I would like to state that I have honestly shared my ideal career aspirations and am not exactly open minded about a total career change into a new industry but am willing and open to suggestions. Thus, if there are any recruiters, organizations, senior traders in the physical commodities trading sector or any other professionals from other industries who are willing to link up with me for an opportunity or discussion after reading this article and viewing my LinkedIn profile, please feel free to drop me a message. 

#aspiring #commodity #trader #idol #Eminem #Zlatan #Ibrahimovic  

Any resemblance to real persons, dead or alive, or other real-life entities, past or present, in this article is purely coincidental.

References (Video) :

Al Pacino best speech - Any Given Sunday - 1080p HD. (2015). Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f1yWSePMqsk

Hemsey, Z. (2017). It's POSSIBLE! ● Zlatan Ibrahimovi? - Motivational Video. [online] YouTube. Available at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgJ3gJb4C1A