From my Desk to your Desk: Ego as an Ally to build a Stronger, Positive Self

I recently had the opportunity to speak with Mariajosé Quiceno Suárez , a leader I admire, who emphasized the importance of having a strong voice as a leader #LaVozDelLíder. This conversation sparked a discussion about the ego and how it is often misunderstood. While the concept of the ego has been widely discussed in psychology, our conversation highlighted that it is frequently associated with negative traits like arrogance and self-interest.

However, we realized there is another side to the ego that deserves recognition—the positive ego. Inspired by this dialogue, I am introducing the sixth edition of the "From My Desk to Your Desk" series. In this installment, I delve into the concept of the positive ego and its crucial role in fostering self-confidence, resilience, and a strong sense of identity.

When I first encountered Sigmund Freud's concept of the ego in his psychoanalytic theory, I was fascinated. Freud described the ego as the part of our psyche that mediates between our primal desires and our moral compass. While this traditional view often portrays the ego in a contentious light, I’ve come to appreciate its fundamental role in shaping how we interact with the world.

A positive ego can be seen as the inner voice that champions our abilities and worth. It is the part of us that encourages self-reflection, aids in decision-making, and justifies our actions in a rational manner. For instance, I remember a time when I had to make a difficult career decision. My positive ego played a crucial role in helping me assess my skills and potential, ultimately giving me the confidence to pursue a new opportunity. When balanced, the ego contributes to a healthy self-esteem and a coherent sense of self, enabling us to navigate life with confidence and purpose.

Having a positive ego is a measure of our psychological resilience. It reflects our ability to handle stress, adapt to change, and bounce back from adversity. A person with strong ego is not easily overwhelmed by life’s challenges; instead, they approach obstacles with a problem-solving mindset and maintain emotional stability. For example, I recall a close friend who faced a series of setbacks, including job loss and a health scare. Despite these challenges, she maintained her composure, sought out new opportunities, and remained optimistic. Her strong ego strength allowed her to navigate these difficult times with resilience and charm.

Developing a positive ego involves fostering self-awareness and nurturing a balanced self-esteem. It’s about building adaptive coping mechanisms that allow us to face life’s ups and downs. Practices like mindfulness, self-compassion, and constructive self-talk are key to cultivating an ego that supports our well-being.

In my own experience, practicing mindfulness has helped me stay grounded and maintain a positive outlook during stressful periods. Additionally, engaging in regular self-reflection has enabled me to understand my strengths and areas for growth, further reinforcing my positive ego. For instance, during a particularly challenging project at work, I used mentoring as a way to remind myself of my capabilities and past successes, which helped me persevere and complete the project successfully.

The positive ego is an invaluable ally on our journey to self-realization. It empowers us to embrace our strengths, learn from our weaknesses, and grow into our best selves. I've seen this in my own life and in the lives of those around me. By recognizing and nurturing our positive ego, we can unlock the potential for a life of fulfillment, authenticity, and psychological well-being.

Let’s commit to this journey together. Take a moment each day to reflect on your achievements, practice self-compassion, and celebrate your growth. By doing so, we can all step into a more fulfilling and authentic life. I encourage you to start this journey today: practice mindfulness, engage in self-reflection, find a meaningful mentor, and cultivate self-compassion. Embrace the power of your positive ego and step confidently into a brighter, more resilient future. Together, we can unlock our true potential and live a life of fulfillment and authenticity.

I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences. How has your positive ego helped you in your journey? What practices have you found most effective in nurturing it? Share your views and join the conversation. Together, we can learn and grow from each other's insights.