From a letter to Derek...

I’m 23 and have had the most dense experiences in the past year. I recently watched Andrew Wilkinson's podcast with Derek Sivers and it made me think hard about all of those.

Here’s a list of things I saved and pondered upon. In no particular order.?

1/ What are you optimising for?

Derek talked about the last 15 years of his life; he is optimising for personal growth. Not status. Not money in the bank.?

And that real personal growth is not about doing more of what you’re currently doing. But going against your instinct. Saying yes to something you never would’ve. Your mind expands only when you give it new experiences.?

It made me think – what am I optimising for? I know it is not things like money in the short term. It is personal growth as well.

Before Derek helped articulate this, I would define it as “the ability to build anything I set my mind to”. Now I have the words to articulate it – growth. And growth in the long term. Not in the short-term get-a-salary-hike sense.?

I consider myself lucky that I get to build C4E alongside Saurabh Garg , Fareen Vazir and everyone else with a C4E tag on LinkedIn or in their hearts.

But, I have also struggled to give a neat, structured answer to anyone who asks me what I have learned in my time here. Even for myself, it was only recently that I got to see all the work of the last 3 years in action - when I earned the opportunity to be a co-founder of a large, impactful business. One that also happened to have the potential to be valued at a couple of million dollars. And have a clear path to success and all that.?

Today, at C4E , we may not know our moat. Or the large impactful idea. But I know this for sure – if I am optimising for growth in the long term, I am in the right place.?

2/ Burning the ships

Long ago, I had read about how it takes courage to NOT have a plan B. Till you’re not all in, you’re not in.

Derek used the ship analogy. Legend says that a navy general once asked 100 of his men to burn the ships when they landed on enemy grounds. It was to leave no chance for retreat. They were ready to fight.?

Think of the Spartans’ mindset. Or even Will Smith when he said –?

The only thing that I see that is distinctly different about me is I'm not afraid to die on a treadmill. I will not be out-worked, period. You might have more talent than me, you might be smarter than me, you might be sexier than me, you might be all of those things you got it on me in nine categories. But if we get on the treadmill together, there's two things: You're getting off first, or I'm going to die. It's really that simple, right?

For me, in the context of C4E , I may not have burnt my ships. I have a safety net. Or at least the ability to find a plan B when push comes to shove. But, I operate from the all-in mindset. I will either die trying or win it.?

3/ Money

Derek talked about his relationship with money. And made me think about mine.?

The other day, a friend asked me what I would do if I had 100 crores. Or if I had made all the money I talk about making.?

I listed out a couple of things and they ended up sounding slightly basic. Here -

• Travel. Whether it’s being able to see friends / family when I wish to, or living like a local in a different country just because I feel like it.?

• Experiences. Particularly experiences that help me build taste. And taste as Paul Graham defines it – https://paulgraham.com/taste.html. I’m okay to be proven wrong but so far, money has allowed me to be in rooms and places that help build taste. I don’t have the ambition to buy a boat, but I will want to fly business. I’ve done it once and it confirmed my belief.

• My people. I may not want a boat or a home but if my people do, I want to be able to get that for them.?

• Women in India. I will find a way to help women make their own money so they have the option to choose independence. And freedom. In case - a note that did not leave the drafts.

But no, I don’t want to own a home (just had my landlord come check leakages in a home he doesn’t even live in). Or wear certain brands for the status they carry. Comfort, yes. Status, no.?

Oh, sometime 2 years ago, another shift happened. As a 19-year-old from a lower-middle-class family who had just earned her first stipend, I believed that I would always work for money.

Money > growth. Money > opportunity. Money > interestingness.?

Now, I know that when you add value to the world around you and at large, the money will come. The rewards will come. And the compounding will happen.

4/ Fame

Derek accepts he likes his fame; it has enabled him to be in rooms he’d like to be in. But he doesn’t care for more. Definitely not so much that he can’t hang out in public places.?

For me? Here’s a snippet from a post I wrote a year ago and I think it is still relevant.?

I would, however, change the word ‘audience’. I don’t want a following, or like people who follow my ideology or anything. But just a chance to use the power of writing to meet other interesting folks.?

I don’t envision myself being a celebrity of any sort. I do, however, envision “fame” to give me access to things life has to offer. And you don’t need an audience or a fan following for it.?

All that I do today (even this post :D) to build my brand is a means to an end. Not the end itself.

5/ A stubborn visionary

He used the word ‘stubborn visionary’ to describe the person who made Dubai. It does take a stubborn person to build something audacious. Among other traits.?

While thinking about stubborn visionaries, a few names came to mind. Do you want to take a guess?

And when I read ‘stubbornness’ in this case, I am thinking self-belief and conviction. This individual isn’t just a visionary, but a stubborn one who won’t stop. Might even be crazy to keep going against all odds.? 苹果 said it long ago, "Because people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones that do".

It’s what Charlie Munger said about Elon Musk – never underestimate a man who overestimates himself. It’s what Sam Altman said about how to be successful – have almost too much self-belief.

They’re all stubborn traits. I am not a visionary, but I want to be stubborn with what I do. And I want to surround myself with stubborn visionaries. They are the ones who will create a dent in the universe. Who is one you know?

6/ On beliefs

Choose beliefs that are useful to you, not because they’re right. As someone who goes out in the world as a sponge, trying to learn as much, I found this a useful metric. The debate isn’t about what’s right or wrong, it’s only about following what’s useful to you, in your context.?

7/ Emails and people

Derek is an inherently curious man. Throughout the episode, you will see him be most excited about the opportunity to meet and learn from people.?

A habit I am inspired by and want to adopt – Derek doesn’t have a newsletter but exchanges emails with all people who’ve written to him at some point. He’s sorted these emails city-wise. And when he is in a new place, he meets them.?

Until I saw his long list of people he’s met in Chennai, I did not think there were so many interesting people in the city.

That was all.

If you’ve made it here, you should go ahead and also watch the video. Hear Derek talk about these things with joy on his face. I have only captured some parts :)