From haze to amaze!

The first session in 2023, of the monthly NLP practice group I run was on January 8th. I ran a session on what would be our "Mission Impossible" for 2023, through basic application of NLP techniques!

As a preparation for the session, I shared a "behind the scenes" clip of Tom Cruise attempting a daredevil stunt for the upcoming Mission Impossible movie. This stunt is perhaps the most difficult that the star has attempted as yet.

I love one line that Cruise says in the clip, "don't be cautious, be confident". This showcases why he is able to produce jaw dropping stunt work one film after another. (Side bar: You will remember the phenomenal work in Top Gun Maverick recently as well). He shows that with right number of resources, training and practice, any seemingly unsurmountable task can be carried out.

Above all, it shows the clarity in his approach. He clearly sees and feels what the end result should look and feel like. And he truly believes it can be done. In other words, there is no "haze".

In our session, participants listed down some items that they thought were "impossible" for them to do in 2023! Just the fact that each one wrote these down, meant that somewhere deep down they recognized it was probably doable. That's the starting point that we often miss. That which we consider is difficult, there is something that makes us think it can be achieved. In our mind, we very well know the bridge we must cross to go from here to there.

But that bridge soon gets covered in haze.

One participant said, "I want to write a journal every day, but I need to be organized and write regularly, and it should mean something." I asked if what made writing a journal every day important. "I will be able to put down my thoughts and express myself", came the answer.

In this context, everything else, other than "putting down thoughts and expressing" is what I call "haze". It is a bunch of situations we imagine must happen for us to achieve the goal. It is like setting a goal and creating smoke and mirrors so we cannot proceed. It is a fantasy of our own creation that then holds us back! Unknowingly, we put more effort in maintaining the haze, than finding alternatives and resources.

There is presupposition we use in NLP called "if one thing doesn't work, try something different".

Through the work during the session, everyone was able to distinguish their goal/outcome and the haze they had created around it. Through keeping the haze separate from their goal, they were able to find ways which are within their control, that will help them achieve their goal. We worked on creating a clear, vivid and rich imagery of our end goal, so it remains in sight, even if the haze returns!

No matter how much we clean on a regular basis, dust reappears in our home. But it is the clear vision of a beautiful home that gets us down to the business of cleaning it up again!

Our old habits are what add to the "haze". But once the shiny, vivid and rich image of how "Mission Accomplished" looks like is clear in our mind, we are able to find our way around any haze that comes up in the form of hurdles or challenges!

I have summarized the broad process we went through during our session. You can use this when you set your goals!

• Frame a clear outcome (usually expressed as "I want to .....")
• List down everything that will prevent you from getting there - that's haze, by the way!
• Look at what you wrote down as outcome and compare it with everything that is haze.
• List down the impact that the haze has on you (how you feel, what you see, any thoughts that crop up, sensations in your body, etc.)
• Take your outcome - and paint a rich imagery of how it will look like when it is accomplished (where you will be, who you are with, how you feel, your emotional state, what you are telling yourself, what's happening in your surroundings, etc.) Don't be stingy, be elaborate and creative!
• Now compare the impact versus this imagery that you created just now. Choose what you would like to focus on.
• Notice the shift in your perspective now, as opposed to when you listed down the constraints or hurdles.

Now, you are ready to move from haze, to amaze!