The landscape of modern dating can feel like navigating a minefield, especially with the emergence of new dating terms and behaviors. Understanding these terms can help you recognize patterns in your dating life and equip you with the tools to navigate contemporary dating confidently. Here's a glossary of some of the most common dating terms and tips on handling these behaviors effectively.
- Ghosting: The act of suddenly and without explanation disappearing from someone's life after establishing some form of connection. This behavior can leave the other person feeling confused and hurt.
- Breadcrumbing: Sending sporadic but non-committal messages to keep someone's interest alive without intending to pursue a meaningful relationship. It's a way of leading someone on without offering genuine affection or commitment.
- Benching: Keeping someone on the sidelines as a backup while exploring other dating options. This involves sporadic communication to maintain interest but avoiding full engagement.
- Zombieing is when someone who ghosted you suddenly returns as if they've come back from the dead, typically with little to no explanation.
- Cushioning: Flirting with or dating other people to cushion the potential emotional blow if your primary relationship doesn't work out.
- Orbiting is when someone stops direct communication but continues to engage with your social media, such as liking your posts or watching your stories. It's a way to stay in your life without having an actual relationship.
- Thirst Trapping involves posting provocative or attention-seeking photos on social media to attract potential partners. It's a way to garner likes, comments, and messages without a genuine intention to pursue a relationship.
- Love Bombing is showering someone with excessive affection and attention early in a relationship to gain control or influence over them.
- Stashing: Keeping a romantic partner a secret from your friends, family, and social media. This can make the other person feel undervalued and hidden.
- Submarining: Similar to zombieing, this involves someone who ghosted you resurfacing after a long period of no contact, as if nothing happened.
- Recognize the Signs: Knowing these terms helps you identify when they happen to you. If someone's behavior matches one of these patterns, it's crucial to acknowledge it rather than make excuses.
- Set Boundaries: Clearly define and communicate your boundaries. If someone repeatedly crosses these boundaries, it's a sign to reconsider the relationship.
- Prioritize Communication: Healthy relationships are built on open and honest communication. If someone is unwilling to engage in meaningful conversations, it may indicate they are not genuinely interested in a serious relationship.
- Don't Take It Personally: Understand that these behaviors often reflect the other person's issues rather than your worth. People engage in ghosting, breadcrumbing, and other behaviors for various reasons, many of which are beyond your control.
- Seek Clarity: Be bold and ask direct questions if you need clarification on someone's intentions. Clear communication can save you time and emotional energy.
- Move On: If you encounter negative dating behaviors, it's essential to move on rather than wait for someone to change. Focus on finding someone who respects and values you.
- Practice Self-Care: Modern dating can be emotionally taxing. Ensure you're taking care of your mental and emotional health by engaging in activities that make you happy and relaxed.
- Stay Positive: Remember that many genuine and respectful people are out there despite the challenges. Stay optimistic and open to new opportunities.
- Leverage Your Network: Utilize matchmaking services like the Worldwide Referral Network to connect with vetted and ethical matchmakers. They can help you find compatible matches and guide your dating journey.
Navigating modern dating can be complex, but understanding its terminology and associated behaviors can help you make informed decisions. By recognizing these patterns and employing strategies to handle them, you can protect yourself from unnecessary emotional stress and focus on building meaningful connections. Remember, you deserve to be treated with respect and honesty in all your relationships.
For more insights on contemporary dating and relationship advice, follow my LinkedIn page. If you're ready to take the next step in your dating journey, consider joining the Worldwide Referral Network to connect with ethical matchmakers who can help you find your ideal match.
Arlene Washburn, Science-Based Dating and Relationship Expert and Managing Director, Worldwide Referral Network
