From Freud to Vipassana, Freudian insight through Silence: A Vipassana Experience

Background

I came to know about Vipassana during my undergraduate years while reading case studies in organizational behavior. One of the organizational leaders shared her experience with Vipassana and how it transformed her life. At that time, it seemed like a daunting task to undertake Vipassana and to convince my parents that I would be completely out of touch, no mobile, no contact for 10 days. I would only be with my body, breath, and mind. But finally, the day arrived. In August, 2024 I completed a 10-days Vipassana Retreat, and today, I am going to share my experience. I will share it in different phases:

Experience

Phase 1 : The Breath of Curiosity: Entering the world of Vipassana

I was excited about this retreat, as my curiosity had been building since my graduate years. I enrolled in this course with the intention of exploring my mind, both conscious and unconscious, and understanding how it functions. On the first day, we started with Anaa- pana, where we observed our breath throughout the day. This continued for the next three to four days.

After three days, I began to question what I was doing there. I doubted the significance of this Retreat, as we had only been observing our breath since day one. I felt like giving up and withdrawing from the course. However, in the sessions with S.N. Goenka ji, he emphasized giving a fair trial with Vipassana for 10 days, giving it your full effort before making a decision about continuing or discontinuing. This resonated deeply with me because I believe in the principle of not judging a book by its cover. Determined to see it through, I decided to complete the 10 days, no matter what it took.

Phase 2 :The Struggle and Resolution: Discovering the Purpose of Vipassana

On the evening of the fourth day, we were introduced to Vipassana meditation. It was then, I realized the significance of the three days spent observing the breath. It was preparation to equip us for taking Vipassana. Throughout the process, many questions arose in my mind, but each day, S.N. Goenka's sessions provided answers to those questions without me even asking. I started to notice how each day added value to my life. The clarity about the functioning of my mind and the world around me became sharper with each passing day, motivating me to stay the course.

Phase 3: The Light of Insight: Unfurling the knots in Unconscious mind.

In the middle of the retreat, during our rest time, I was reminded of Viktor Frankl's book, Man's Search for Meaning.

Viktor Frankl's experience in the concentration camps, as described in Man’s Search for Meaning, and my Vipassana retreat both delve into the depths of human suffering and the search for inner peace. Frankl's concept of finding meaning through suffering aligns with the Vipassana practice of observing and understanding our deepest sensations and emotions. While Frankl found purpose and resilience in the harshest conditions, Vipassana provided a structured way to explore and transcend my own inner turmoil. Both experiences underscore the potential for personal transformation through deep introspection and acceptance of one’s inner reality, revealing that even in silence or adversity, profound insights and clarity can emerge.

I started asking myself deep questions: What is suffering? What is restlessness? What is anxiety? What is insecurity? What am I craving? As I observed these sensations and emotions for what they were, I noticed that they gradually faded, and a light of wisdom began to illuminate within me. I guess, This state was blissful and joyful, and I felt like I could stay in it for a lifetime. But my teacher brought a new clarity- I should not become attached to these pleasant sensations. If I am attaching my self, I will start developing craving for it. They will come and go. The ultimate goal is to observe your body objectively, whether the emotions or states are positive or negative. Through this, I learned to observe my emotions objectively.

Phase 4: Freudian Echoes: Cleansing the Unconscious Mind.

During my 10-days Vipassana retreat, I experienced a profound connection between Sigmund Freud’s theory of the unconscious mind and the practice of deep meditation. Freud postulated that much of human behavior is driven by unconscious thoughts, desires, and memories. Through Vipassana, I was able to access these hidden layers of my mind, bringing unconscious material into conscious awareness. The practice felt like a form of self-directed psychoanalysis, where observing my breath and bodily sensations allowed repressed emotions and unresolved conflicts to surface. Just as Freud believed in the therapeutic potential of making the unconscious conscious, Vipassana facilitated a similar process, leading to greater emotional balance and mental clarity. This experience reaffirmed Freud’s insights into the power of the unconscious mind, while also offering a practical method for cleansing and integrating these deeper layers of consciousness.

Phase 5: The Art of Observation to Purify the Mind

Bhagavad Gita 6.5:

"??????????????????? ?????????????????

?????? ????????? ???????????? ????????????"

Translation:

One must elevate, not degrade, oneself by one's own mind. The mind alone is the friend of the self, and it alone is the enemy of the self.

In the Bhagavad Gita, Lord Krishna emphasizes the importance of the mind in shaping our destiny, highlighting that the mind can be both our friend and our enemy. This teaching aligns deeply with my Vipassana experience, where the core practice is the art of observation to purify the mind. Vipassana trains us to observe objectively our thoughts, emotions, and sensations without attachment, thereby gradually transforming the mind from an enemy filled with impurities to a friend that guides us toward liberation.

As I sat in silent meditation, observing my breath and bodily sensations, I realized that the mind, when undisciplined, can lead to suffering and confusion. However, through persistent observation and awareness, the same mind can be cultivated to become a source of inner peace and clarity. Just as the Bhagavad Gita teaches us to elevate ourselves through mindful self-control, Vipassana provides a practical method to purify the mind, leading it toward a state of liberation and pure consciousness.

Phase 6: Gratefulness Prayer

On the last day, we were taught a new practice, which was also very profound( it's a simple gratefulness meditation ). And The prayer that played in S.N. Goenka's voice was particularly liberating:

"???? ???? ???? ???? ???? ???? ??? ?? ???? ????,

???? ????, ???? ???? ??? ??

??? ??????? ?? ??? ???? ?? ???? ???? ??? ??,

??? ???? ?? ??? ???? ??, ???? ???? ??? ??

????-???? ?? ??????, ?? ???? ?? ???? ??? ??

?? ??? ?? ?? ???????? ?????? ?? ???? ??? ??

?? ???, ?? ??? ?? ??? ??? ???? ???? ??? ??

??????? ?? ?????? ????, ????? ?????? ??? ??

???, ????? ?? ??? ??? ????, ??? ????? ??? ??

????? ???? ???? ?? ????, ??? ?????? ??? ??

?? ???? ?? ?? ??? ???, ??-?? ??? ???? ???? ??

????? ???? ??-?? ??? ????, ??-?? ????? ???? ??

???? ????, ???? ????, ???? ???? ??? ??."

Phase 7 : Universal Dharma: Understanding True Religion Through Vipassana

During this retreat, I also gained clarity about what true Dharma (religion) is, its universality. Some doubts that had been lingering in the back of my mind were also resolved.

Phase 8: A Community of Seekers: Connections Beyond Silence

On the last day, I made new friends.We didn’t exchange a single word during the retreat, yet by the end, I felt a deep sense of belonging with everyone who was there. Our batch was a diverse group of people, including businessmen, manager, designer, students, engineers, lawyers, politicians, a retired army veteran, administrator, a coach, an actor and me as a psychologist.

Conclusion

All in all, my objective in sharing this experience is to encourage you to Experiment Vipassana at least once in your lifetime.

I particularly recommend it to psychology students and enthusiasts because it has a lot to teach us about the functioning of the unconscious mind in a practical way.

If you have any questions or thoughts to add, feel free to connect with me. I will be happy to answer any questions regarding the 10-day Vipassana course.