From Cooking to Trucking

To my beautiful sister.

Who knew life could be so difficult and challenging at times? The past year has been an unpredictable one. So many changes that could change a person's point of view on things. But this last incident was a tough one, a hard pill to swallow which was the death of my sister. I still can't believe it. What's worse is the one person that was taken for granted is no longer in our presence. She was my older sister, the one who would seek me out making sure I was OK. The one that seem to be worrisome. How could I leave my sister alone in the hospital? She had no kids, no husband, and no partner. Besides she was my sister. At times months would pass us, but through those months we thought about each other. I would either call her or she would call me. Her voice calling for me I will always miss. Petra was her name. She has been there from the time I was born until the day she took her last breath. I was her baby sister and still am. Should I say she was my inspiration for cooking, trucking? Not really, but she knew I had a passion for it as I did begin to have for driving. She loved to eat my food.

Deciding to venture out into truck driving was not an idea I would have ever thought of doing until it popped up on social media. After applying for several companies, I recieved an invitation to a company who decided to reach out. With hesitancy I took the invitation after hanging up on the recruiter a couple of times. I was always told, "What do you have to lose?" So I filled out the application and decided to take the venture. Oh, it wasn't easy. What made it slightly manageable at the time was when I decided to move out of my place, which was the only part that made it easy. My sister was the only one who helped me. I was so glad it happened the way it did. My living environment became quite toxic from neighbors who weren't so kind. I must have cried almost every night during the last few days of my training. I felt alone many times and the only person that got me through was the mentor coordinator and a friend who would talk me through when I wanted to give up. He and she were in my corner.

I had been stuck in a hotel for several weeks waiting on an driving instructor who we call a mentor coordinator. One who could be respectful and actually know what he or she was doing. Oh, there is a need of good mentor intructors in the trucking industry. But I did have good mentors, although I went through four. Still, I learned from each one. I didn't make the first cut and had to go back on the truck for another 2 weeks...ugh!(lol) And that was not easy at all. Backing is always difficult if one hasn't backed a 53' trailer in a tight dock. Nope! And running a red light is no joke! Yep, I did run a red light because I was simply exhausted and confused with the lights that were not familiar to me. (Mentors, at times, make mistakes as well, but not all). It was a vital learning moment. Automatic fail!! Heartwrenching after training for almost two months. Besides being extremely exhausted, from what I saw, all lights and traffic were clear and did not visualize the correct light. It was a test! An important one! It doesn't make one a bad driver. Nonetheless, I remained very careful on all my turns and I was given another chance. Being exhausted from training on the road for three weeks and was not ready to take the that test? For me, I needed at least 2 days to recoop. Being pushed to take a test without having a rest period is never good, in my opinion. Don't these people know this, I thought? Well, regardless, I had to simply do my best effort and press through if I wanted to drive a big rig! Best choice I ever made!! And nothing like cooking!

Having a passenger is not always easy for some driving instructors, mentors. They don't know your background and at times wonder, 'What the heck is this person is doing', they may wonder? There are some who were simply are not good instructors and do it nonetheless for whatever reason. Those who are good mentors are truly patient and allow the student driver to actually drive! But there were those certain folk who do everything to discourage with their negative remarks and sometimes those who sexually assault a student driver. But this wasn't the case for me. Sexual harrasment is something I would never toloerate! Nor would I quit and would fight back for any remarks that are not kind. Nope! I stand my ground and move forward. I had good mentors after going through a couple of them. But I'm not here to judge! (Let he/she who has not sinned cast the first stone). Mentors are people too. And they make mistakes like anyone else. But when one has a good mentor, that my friend is priceless. My last two mentors were awesome! Great instructors and one who allowed me to drive the whole time. That made me happy as a duck in a pond! Never been a duck! (lol)

It was not easy training at times. At one time while staying in the hotel, I cried for hours. Felt like bootcamp! This was after I completed the training portion and while waiting for that driver instructor. At times, it may seem that the industry isn't always fair. And there are those who would not want women to drive trucks. Maybe because most do not think women are capable to do the job. Or simply the ego is too large for one to concieve that a woman driver can be the best driver. Nonetheless, I actually enjoy working with the fellas for the most part. Getting yelled at is not easy when one has tried their best. It doesn't happen often but ti does. Again, I cried. I recall rasing my voice when my own daughter was learning how to drive. I knew she could do it. And she did. I knew once she learned how to drive that she could teach others. So, try not to take it personal.

There are drivers who are so disrespectful and blatantly rude. One can't help but fight back after you begin to believe that its simply not right to be treated so poorly. But then again, one has to be very wise these days. If you're not a fighter, you will become one in some form! But that's simply the trucking industry at times. At least it's what I've learned and at times have been schooled in the industry. Still, I appreciate the companies in itself for giving me who knew nothing about driving a truck a chance for a new career. Personally, I feel there needs to be some changes that will best interest all drivers as well as women in this trucking industry. In my opinion, for the better of humanity and our society where all are welcome who truly wish to drive a truck!

Trucking has to be the best job I have ever experienced. Getting out of the kitchen, oh heck yeah! It feels good to drive that big rig! It feels empowering not only as a woman truck driver but as an employee doing something great as a service for our country. Yep, if it weren't for us truck drivers, there would be no economy, unless one has their own plot of ground. And still would need a truck driver since its been the beginning our our own economy. Unfortunately what happenes, one may become ill. This doesn't always happen and it does. Or a emergency may come up. After driving through certain terrains which I would do again anytime in a heart beat, I did become ill. I'm not use too driving through some of the changes of elevations in the mountians, but absolutely love it. It takes a while to get use too driving along with plenty of breaks. At least as much as possible. I rather drive through mountains then Dallas's freeways. Crazy traffic! Not enough healthy foods play a vital role in the trucking industry as well as good hydration. I'm sure that's going to change for the better, eventually! Better food choices with low salt and less fats! More veggies and difinitely less carbs! Excercise is key, as well as breating and meditation. But I always feel good getting in and out of the truck. And loneliness is a biggy. Still, driving with the full moon beaming down on a driver as though it's saying, 'I'm here to make sure you are safe and light up the roads for you', is quite special. It also could have been when me and my DM who at point could not see eye to eye. Yes at times DMs and their drivers may not see eye to eye. DMs get equally as stressed. You see, drivers are valid people as well as DMs. Without our DMs, there is no driving, right? (So make sure you get a good one!)

At times, there are those who have had enough or those who really don't care. Some see driving as just a job, but its more then just a job. Its a service which plays not only a vital part of our economy but brings goods to a varitey of communities. I would say, "We boldly go where no man or woman has gone before", and absolutely love it! Call me strange. (lol)

Many drivers quit and leave the trucking industry at a high rate. I believe larger companies get the brunt of law suits. They get sued for various reasons. And then laws are established. So some good comes out of it all. Not caring enough for the fellow driver or perhaps not caring enough for the company itself often play a huge role. Its hard to say at times. But thats when laws come in and are made. But I'm sure its many reasons as stated. Oh yes, I was promised a rare positon which I never recieved. Im sure it was miscommunication or some sort of misunderstanding. I misunderstood and did not know all of the links that chain a driving company. Its good to learn them. Not understanding only brings confusion to a new driver. And not getting the leave of absence which I felt should have happened when my sister was critically ill, only brought more misunderstandings. But people are human and make mistakes, which i do not blame. Things happen.

My sister had suffered a major brain bleed, a (blood clot) while in her apartment and layed there for several days alone with no help. She simply could not move. By the time I and her apartment manager found her, she was at deaths' door. It was a miracle she was still alive. Perhaps it was the initiation of my slight illness that brought me back home. Also the intuiton of the church staff who called me to check on her while waiting to be released by my doctor. The miracle was that she was still alive. My sister was a volunteer for the church she attended, the homeless community, as well as helping those who grieve the loss of others. In my personal opinion, without humanity, there is no business. Life does go on, when things are right, in my opinion! But you know what they say about opinions! Anyway,I would say enjoy each moment of living as much as possible! Losing a loved one has to be the most difficult thing one has to go through, even as a truck driver. At that time, I simply could not understand why I wasn't allowed to get an emergency leave of absense. But business is business. It must move on. It maybe true for the most part if we are all counted for sheep for slaughter. A beautiful human's life is imperative. And my sister had a beautiful soul. she was one of a kind and I will always miss her.

While driving, there were times I questioned,"What the heck am I doing?" A concrete support system is so imparative, which I felt I had little of because it was so new. I could hear my last mentors' kind voice say, who shared some of her experiences with driving. And that kept me going. I remember when I got lost because of the navigation system gave me incorrect directions. I called the after hours dispatch and was told in a sarcastic manner, 'So you want me to get behind the wheel and drive you out?'. I was in the middle of God only knows where. I didn't panic at all. Always having a bit of faith that I would get out of wherever I was suppose to be. It was late at night, and I was by myself. Thank goodness for the full moon since it was in the middle of country land. Plus I'm sure I had my guardian angels with me. (My mother and father's spirit). They were tough people that i can appreciate so much. I almost scolded the After Hours dispatch who lead me in circles. It wasn't funny at the time, but I laugh now. Nonetheless, I made it through after the After Hours satff figured it out, which I only needed confirmation. By the time they figured it out, I already had some sense of direction where I was. Talk about holding one's hand! Sometimes its needed. (lol) I was still learning.

I would drive mostly at night putting in a bit over 2,000 miles a week. I feel so proud of myself. At times I wished I could have shared my issues with the company and with someone who understood. Better yet, lend a sympathetic ear. No sympathy, at times, in the trucking industry or any industry that has to go on, move forward. (Some need to watch Cast Away. Great movie, by the way.) Unfortunately it does happen. One gets lost. I had good guys monitoring me. And that made me feel much safer. Although, there were some great guys, there are those who only care about that mighty dollar. But for the most part I have been on time and safety was never an issue for me since I pride myself to be a good driver and thats what it takes. Being a good driver.

Perhaps because of the timeliness or the pressure itself in the trucking industry, makes it difficult for drivers and the companies. Of course, I was learning and still am learning, even on the political aspect of it. Drivers always learn. I mean being new to the industry and to be discouraged is not a good thing. Those who have been in it for a time period may appear to be or become heartless. But thats not always true. And for myself, I actually love it, especially those long hauls and a chance to get away. A sense of freedom and knowing that one is doing something great in serving. Or it maybe because my father was a railroad worker and I am a bit familiar with transportation. Just a bit. (Smile) Playing with the BIG DOGs, so to speak! My father always thought that a woman's place was in the kitchen and its where she belonged, I'm sure for her safety. I would hope so, for her safety. I suppose a bit of 'Tom Boy' came into play because its fun in my opinion, especially when making that perfect backing into a tight spot! Not easy at all! It can be hard work!

Yep, the best job I have ever obtained in my life experience. From cooking to trucking. Although, there maybe plenty of discouragements from some folks. Its not good enough to quit. And the encouragements are good enough for one to remain on board! "All aboard!!!!"

Stay away from those who are critical and do not have a clue what it means to be a trucker. They are the ones who put out fires and a desire to drive! They are the narrow minded (or concerned) and can only view things in their own eyes. They simply do not get it! So, stay encouraged! Hang in there my friends, sisters, and brothers in the trucking industry! Trucking is more then just driving. It's a wonderful venture and an opportunity to see our country at ground level....especially those billions of years old mountain formations that only God and evolution can only create. If one doesn't believe in God or a higher being, then just become a trucker! For myself, its a chance to see some incredibly beautiful places that are hidden as well as an experience of a lifetime. Its either becoming a pilot or a trucker. I choose trucking and felt it was and is the right thing for myself. If anything, it feeds that little bitty 'Tom Boy' that was never allowed to play as a child. Although some truckers may get or become harmed at times, not always by fault, trucking can become a great experience.

I only wished I could have taken my beautiful sister on that ride. No one knew her like I did, I strongly feel. Many knew her in their own way and how much she shared. She shared intiment moments with me that were and always will be quite special. She was always respectful on her terms as a woman and what she believed in. I strongly felt, although she never like driving on the freeways, I would have eventually convinced her to ride after she got over the shock of me driving a large vehicle. Either way, she would have been proud of her baby sister. But that will never happen. She hated driving on freeways! (lol)

My sister did not like the idea and it pretty much stressed her out quite a bit from what I was told. What made matters worse was when I ended up in ER, due to hydration issues and elevation changes which I wasn't use too. I'm sure not eating right and eating too many carbs played a huge role. Still, I had a stubborn desire to take my sister for a spin in the truck so that she maybe able to experience what I had been enjoying. (Its always good to take a passenger every once in a while, in my opinion). Being a good driver is vital, for the most part, and always praised myself for it. Being a Solo driver also has its rewards.

Learning to drive and following the rules is a good driver, in my opinion. There has to be a trust for the company knowing what they are doing. Still, some disappointments may come along the way. Mistakes are made at times. Its all part of the industry I've learned. Still one can become the boss of their own destiny. Oh yes, being woken up during reast periods is not joke. One needs to rest! And I mean complete rest! Being pulled on by other dispatchers is no joke and can cause mental distress especially to a new driver. Yep, it can get really ugly at times and quite confusing. Through it all continue to do the best to stay as positive as possible. Although challenging, I can say I still love it. But when there is death, losing someone special at times, no one truly understands until it happens to them, personally. Should a person be esteemed higher then another? I don't think so. But in the trucking business this happens quite a bit especially when the competition is high. So hang in there!

Normally for many, driving may not be a traditional job for women but things are changing for the better. Becoming a trucker is the best thing that has ever happened to me and I know my father is somewhat smiling upon me, even though his belief was that a women should never leave the kitchen. Some men may hate it and some men love it! Not all, and there are those who won't admit it. Women truckers are so awesome. I admire every women or man who drives. It gives one, at least for me, a sense of pride. It makes a woman like myself who can do anything she desires to do if she puts their mind and heart to it. I only hope that someday ALL women from all backgrounds will be allowed to be a trucker without judgement or prejudices, and of course without discrimination. The few short months, thus far, I've leaned and have truly enjoyed my experience being behind that wheel, and my hopes is to continue.

To my beautiful sister with love, your sister who wishes you were still here and misses you immensely. Happy Sunday!