From Colleague to Boss: 8 Challenges of Leading Your Peers

I remember the first time I had to lead a team; those of you who have read my books surely already know what it meant for me.

Although there is an aspect I have not yet written about until now.

When I was promoted from Engineer to Supply Chain Operation Manager, three of my colleagues became members of my team. In other words, I had to become the boss of some of my colleagues.

With two of them, I had a good friendship, and in fact, they were a great support for me in this new professional stage.

Over the past ten years, accompanying leaders, I have often encountered executives and middle managers in similar situations. If leading a team can already be a great challenge, transitioning from colleague to boss undoubtedly adds complexity to the situation.

The Main Challenges of This Situation

Rising in your career is almost always a reason to celebrate, but when that promotion involves leading those who were recently your colleagues, the path can become truly complex.

This challenge requires additional skills and a new mindset to navigate the sometimes turbulent waters of this transition.

Here are some of the main challenges that usually arise:

1. The Loneliness of the Leader

One of the first changes you will notice when taking on your new role is the loneliness that can accompany leadership. Now you are the one making the difficult decisions, who must maintain confidentiality on certain matters, and who ultimately bears the responsibility for the team’s results.

This distance is natural and, in some cases, necessary, but it can result in a feeling of isolation.

2. Maintaining Friendship: Favoritism?

You probably have close friends on the team you now lead. Maintaining those relationships without showing favoritism is not easy. The key lies in transparency and fairness. Treat everyone equally and make sure the decisions you make are fair and objective. Clear and open communication can help avoid any perception of favoritism.

3. More Stress

Stress is almost an inevitable part of leading a team. Not only do you have to fulfill your responsibilities, but you also have to ensure your team is aligned and functioning efficiently. This increase in pressure can be overwhelming, so it is essential to develop strategies to manage this stress and seek support when necessary.

This can often translate into more tension, mood swings, and less joviality. This can even make you perceived differently.

4. You Can't Always Do What You Want, But What You Can

As a leader, you will encounter limitations and restrictions that were not as evident before. Not all decisions are under your control, and there will be times when you have to follow directives you don't fully agree with. Adapting to these limitations and working within them is a fundamental part of the new leadership role.

5. Familiarity Breeds Contempt

Without a doubt, I hear this phrase often in these cases. This saying reflects the difficulty of maintaining authority when there is excessive familiarity. It is crucial to establish clear boundaries and remember that, although trust and closeness are important, respect and professionalism must prevail.

6. Uncomfortable Situations and Conflicts

There will be no shortage of uncomfortable situations and conflicts in this new role. Whether it's handling complaints, assigning unpopular tasks, or resolving disputes between colleagues, you will need to tackle these challenges with firmness and empathy. Developing mediation and conflict resolution skills is essential.

7. Jealousy from Others

Not everyone on the team will welcome your promotion. Jealousy and competition can arise, creating a tense environment. It is important to address these feelings directly, acknowledging your colleagues' concerns and ensuring everyone feels valued and heard.

8. Simply Having a Team Is Stressful

Finally, the simple fact of assuming a new role is, in itself, a source of significant stress. There will be a learning curve, and you might face impostor syndrome. Remember you are not alone in this; seek mentors, lean on your professional network, and do not hesitate to ask for help when needed.

8 Recommendations to Overcome These Challenges

1. Seek Mentors and Support Networks:

Find a mentor who has gone through similar experiences. Their advice and support can be invaluable.

Participate in professional networks where you can share experiences and gain support from other leaders.

2. Open and Transparent Communication:

Foster a culture of open and honest communication. This will not only reduce the perception of favoritism but also strengthen trust within the team.

Hold regular meetings with your team to discuss their concerns and receive feedback.

3. Manage Your Stress:

Stress not only affects you but also spreads to your team.

Try to keep your stress levels in check with whatever works best for you: meditation, regular exercise, and hobbies you enjoy.

Do not hesitate to seek professional support if you feel the stress is overwhelming and out of control. Your health and your team will thank you.

4. Set Clear Boundaries:

Clearly define professional expectations and boundaries from the start. This will help maintain a healthy balance between friendship and leadership.

5. Constructive Conflict Management:

Train in conflict resolution techniques to effectively address conflicts and uncomfortable situations that may arise.

Always maintain an attitude of empathy and firmness when dealing with conflicts. Well-managed conflict can even strengthen you and the team.

6. Recognition and Appreciation:

Recognition is probably the most powerful way to motivate a team and is within everyone's reach. It does not necessarily have to be accompanied by a financial reward.

Ensure all team members feel valued for their contributions. Remember that recognition should be deserved, sincere, and well-timed to optimize its motivational effect.

7. Accept and Adapt to Change:

Accept that transitioning to a leadership role takes time and is a continuous learning process. Be patient with yourself and your team.

Remember, the key to overcoming these challenges lies in your willingness to learn and adapt. With the right training and support, you will be able to lead your team successfully and turn challenges into growth opportunities.

8. Training in Soft Skills:

Surely, no one has taught you how to manage people, and without a doubt, it will be one of the most complex missions you will have in your career. Therefore, prepare for it. Train in those skills that you will greatly need from now on:

- Leadership: Invest time in leadership courses and workshops. Learning to inspire and motivate your team is essential for effective leadership.

- Time Management: You will probably now lack time for everything you have to do. Improve your skills to manage time, prioritize tasks, and delegate effectively. This will help you manage the workload and also reduce stress.

- Emotional Intelligence and Conflict Management: You will need this to better manage your emotions and those of your team. This is crucial for resolving conflicts and maintaining a more effective and healthy work environment.

There are many options available to help you develop the necessary skills to lead a team effectively.

In Conclusion

Transitioning from colleague to leader is a challenge in many aspects that requires adaptability, resilience, and a solid professional ethic.

Keep communication open, set clear boundaries, and work on developing the necessary skills to lead effectively. Over time, you will find your leadership style and learn to manage the complexities of this new role with confidence and success.

And you? Have you experienced something similar? Would you add any other challenges or advice?

Do you have anything to add? Please comment!

To learn more about handling these challenges well, let me recommend you my books , which are based on the day-to-day reality of team leadership.

You will find practical strategies and advice to improve your leadership skills.

Each page has useful tools and insights to help you become a respected and effective leader.

Whether you are new to leadership or want to improve your skills, my books offer practical knowledge to turn these challenges into opportunities for personal and professional growth.

Discover how to lead with confidence and success in your leadership journey!

Inma Ríos has been guiding leaders and teams to achieve their goals through training, mentoring, and personal development for over a decade. She is an engineer with over 25 years of corporate experience in various countries. She is also a business trainer, international speaker, and certified Agile Coach Professional. Top Women Leader 2022 Award.

More information at www.inmarios.com