From being in my own world to (trying to) save the world

My beloved subscribers, I know you've been waiting for an article!

If this is your first time here, the Mothership article which made me "in/famous" overnight would help a lot: https://mothership.sg/2021/08/boy-aspergers-syndrome-smrt-ceo-singapore

So let us start this article with three lines:

i. "From living in my own world, to being known across the world."

Autism is commonly referred to as a condition in which we shut ourselves out from the real world, by being in "our own world". This is one of the communication barriers many know - the lack of eye contact, the awkward body language, the sometimes direct expression that feels or sounds rude. I often like to break the word down in Chinese: 自 - self; 闭 - shut.

Even as I look back and hear some of the interesting ranting from my mum, who has been instrumental and supportive in my journey, I learned that such a journey is never easy.

For pursuing the things that I like; that I love, I have been ostracised and teased. For the wisdom in learning that I share with others, some dismiss it as me just trying to "act smart".

While it may not be true for many others with autism, it was my personal decision to learn more and to share more about the condition so that we can all raise awareness of the issue at hand - "autism is not a disease."

Only by pushing boundaries and fighting for what's right, have I rightfully become "LinkedIn-famous". I don't think much about fame as it was never my intention to be so but when I think about it now,

ii. "From being extremely direct, to learning to be diplomatic."

What I am today is because I've always believed in the same things I believe today - to be honest; to be true to myself. Unlike hordes of LinkedIn content we see everywhere, that is often optimised to reach a larger audience, I never cared for it. Yes, of course it's nice to see a large amount of views, impressions, and reactions, but I don't chase after it like a typical social media influencer. Not a Key Opinion Leader (KOL) in social media language but definitely a literal one - a Key Opinionated Leader.

Yes, time and again people have told me I do not understand how humans communicate - that there are hidden signs but what makes you think I don't see and understand them? Your textbook knowledge of what autism is does not apply to everyone with the condition. See, I am a fast learner. And I do believe that it is because of this attribute that I am who I am today - someone who can speak confidently, attend to emergencies proficiently, answer queries even faster than any Generative AI out there could. I am a keen learner. If I was lying to you, I would've been the laziest mofo you'd ever seen.

This fast learner, however, is also a stubborn one. If you're not surprised, then I have to say that I am surprised with myself - I did not believe in the need to memorise station abbreviations. In the past, I believed that NE12/CC13 was enough. If not for what I learned in my day-to-day involvement in Station Operations, I would have never went the extra MKBF to learn another kind of language - the station abbreviation: SER/CSER.

This fast learner also took it for granted that he had superb memory. He forced himself to memorise every MRT station from EW1 Pasir Ris (PSR) to EW27 Boon Lay (BNL), from NS1 Jurong East (JUR) to NS27 Marina Bay (MRB), from NE1 HarbourFront (HBF) to NE17 Punggol (PGL), from CC1 Dhoby Ghaut (CDBG) to CC29 HarbourFront (CHBF). Those who are sharp-minded would then ask: "Where's Pioneer? Where's Joo Koon? What about Marina South Pier?"

Exactly.

Each time the MRT system is updated, I force myself to memorise the entire system, inclusive of the new station or line to boost my memory. This was when I had difficulty memorising the whole of Downtown Line (DTL) and even the Thomson-East Coast Line (TEL) - but I have no difficulty today because my hard work paid off.

You can most certainly take my word for it. Danial Nurhakim had a go at memorising the East West Line (EWL) himself and fell into the same pitfalls again and again - he obliterated EW12 Bugis, but somehow remembered DT14 Bugis (haha), he confused EW15 Tanjong Pagar with EW17 Tiong Bahru - obliterating Tiong Bahru in the process as well, mixed up the order of EW27 Boon Lay, EW28 Pioneer and EW29 Joo Koon. For starters, try memorising the North East Line (with only 17 stops) and let me know how you did!

And it is through this fast learning attitude that I quickly grasped the reality of how humans really communicate. SITCE reinforced this learning. I spoke to so many people and you know what I realised? Everyone was being diplomatic. We all have something to say about something, but we keep it deep within ourselves until we find someone on the same frequency as us to pass that information along, strongly believing that the recipient of the information (which can at times be sensitive) is smart enough to keep it to himself and reveal it to nobody. I will of course not mention names but the dynamics have certainly changed.

We all had something to say about something. We knew exactly who and what is giving us problems but we all choose to be diplomatic. And by entering Suntec with an open mind, real, rail change was achieved. That is what I took away from SITCE.

iii. "From believing there is only black and white, to highlighting grey areas, and embracing the colours of diversity around us."

For someone with autism, there is only black or white. No grey. No other colours. We demand logical explanations for everything we are unable to understand. If your instruction is unclear to us, we will be confused. We cannot really read between the lines. We cannot really understand sarcasm. But I can, because I chose to step out of my comfort zone to understand just how complicated we human beings can be.

Black and white means I was rigidly by the book. Believe me, I have been like this my whole life - "KEEP TO THE LEFT!" as I got pissed at people walking right into me or hogging the escalators.

Grey means I realised the truth - there is no black and white. Why get into an unnecessary argument or fight when I can be the better person - I will switch lanes and go back to keeping left afterwards. I scold people who hog the right side of the escalators but held back after that one time I noticed that the person who was holding back the entire queue of people was an elderly lady, who injured her left hand and so she had to hold the handrail using her right hand. I constantly refer back to this to keep me on track - that we must have an open mind.

How am I able to be so happy, smiles almost everyday nowadays?

I will say this in Chinese: 因为我看开了。(translit. "because I see open already" / translation: "because I opened my eyes" - and saw things differently)

That's the colours of diversity I now see around us. By being emphathetic to others, I am also able to take care of vulnerable passengers - whether they are on wheelchair, visually-impaired, hard-of-hearing or... autistic. Inclusivity has always been in my vocabulary because I understand disability. I don't pretend to know everything. No one knows everything but heck, one can definitely try to know everything by...?

By learning. As people all say, "learning is a never-ending journey". Even as I consider myself an expert, this expert still continues to learn because he knows only by learning, can he teach others. And this is evident when I informally/unofficially trained up new batches of ASMs under my care. Like a father would their children, I am extremely proud that they are now fully proficient in their work today.

I had the idea of writing this all along but even I encountered Writer's Block right at the start. But all I needed was momentum, and see how much I've expressed!

Did I miss something? Let me know if you want to learn more! :-)