Friday Whispers II

You're How Old! - Oh my god, that's ancient.

When I was in my 20s, I considered folk in their 50s old and those in their 70s well past it. Well, as I am in my mid-50s, I have a very different outlook on what old is. I can certainly say that my views have changed considerably, and I feel a bit silly when I look back and think about how I thought about older people.

Having had many conversations with the older generation, a couple of things always arise.

1. They have so much life experience, and lessons learned that we would be foolish not to tap into their wisdom and knowledge.
2. They want to feel valued and not be seen as a drain on the family (yep, that's how a few might sometimes feel).

Tapping into Wisdom

When we allow the older generation to tell their stories, they transport us to a way of life that can feel alien to many, especially the young (what do you mean you didn't have computers and mobile phones, and that's just my kids talking to me). But by listening to their challenges and how they dealt with things, we can gain insights and lessons that can help us and the younger generation as they face their challenges.

The older generation certainly had it tough, well compared to how things are for many of us and our kids, but the reality is that it was just a way of life, and they dealt with it and got on. We can all learn from that approach of not looking at the negatives but accepting that we can adapt and find new ways forward. The older generation did, and they seemed to do well in it.

Feeling Valued

I know that as my own family grew up, my focus was on them and maybe not so much on my parents; I didn't deliberately isolate my parents, but looking back, I probably didn't see that they loved being involved, but at times they felt they should leave us to get on with things. In hindsight, I should and could have done more to make maybe them feel more valued and allow them to show us all that no matter your age; you can always do things to help (even just listening to us or us listening to them).

My parents didn't take the lead in engaging with us, as they felt it might be intruding, and they waited on being invited to visit, etc. This is often how the older generation can feel, 'we'd better not interfere, just let them get on with things'. Oh, how far from the truth, and hopefully, I will strike a different balance with my kids and their families in the future. One that enables us to continue to get value from sharing experiences and wisdom.

So, if you have read this far, firstly, thank you, and I hope you take the opportunity to gain insights and wisdom from the Elders in your life and also show them how valued they are.

Before it's Too Late!

If you want to explore more, please contact or look at Alive.photos for more insights into celebrating our Elders.