Friday Flowers to Mom

Recently I read some beautiful and kind #fridayflowers posts and was inspired to share one dedicated to my mother.

I am an only child, and probably because of that, I have a very close relationship with my mother, Yelena. We spend hours reflecting on life, which I’ve branded “conversations with my mother.” She is my lighthouse and best friend, and I know how lucky I am to have such a close-knit relationship with her. But this post isn’t just about my deep love for my mom.?

I’m dedicating this #fridayflowers to her because I’m thinking about how much I’ve learned from her – and about the profound wisdom mothers pass on to their children. I’m sharing some lessons from my mom that may inspire you to reflect as they have done for me.

I recently asked my mom if she could summarize her guiding principles, and without missing a beat, she listed three:

·? Be kind.

·? Be humble.

·? Be honest with yourself.?

These guiding principles are the result of her lived experience and reflection – the lessons she’s gained from her triumphs and mistakes along the way.?

First, kindness. Like many of your mothers probably did, my mom has always taught me the importance of being kind. But when I asked her why kindness has been such an important principle in her life, her answer hit me in a deeper way. Kindness is how you build community, she said. Building a community is one of the most important things we can do to achieve personal and professional fulfillment. When you put kindness into the world, that’s what you get back... most of the time. She's always the first to ask about someone's day, offer a compliment, or share an honest insight. When people see her, their faces light up.?

Next, humility. I get the general definition of this word, but I asked her to tell me more -- why does humility matter beyond the seemingly obvious? “When you’re humble, you have clarity,” she said. You’re in touch with reality and living in the truth, not some created story. Humility grounds you, providing a clear view of your strengths and weaknesses. It strips away illusions and connects you with the reality of who you truly are. If you couple this humility with self-awareness and stay open to new perspectives, you will make better decisions. This is key for all aspects of your life.?

Finally, a principle I hadn’t heard her express this way before: Be honest with yourself. Know yourself to your core. Keep your internal compass strong, and you’ll avoid being swayed aimlessly, at best, or caught in a tornado at worst. Honesty will provide an anchor for self-control, which is a foundation you need to lead yourself or anyone around you.

I admire how "anchored" my mom is. She knows who she is. She’s clear about the community she’s building, how she’s giving back, and where she’s spending her precious time.?

This perspective has had a profound impact on my own anchor, which I reflect on daily. I am not afraid to ask critical questions of myself and engage people who don’t placate me.?

What’s the most important lesson an influential person has taught you? Who will you dedicate your #fridayflowers to?