Freedom - To Make a Choice?

The headline of this newsletter article is deliberately written as a question. Freedom to make a choice? Are you? Are you really free? Stop and think for a sec - what's causing you to NOT be free, if the answer is no?

Now, assuming you're not in prison or living in some despot dictatorship country, let's start narrowing down what's causing you to question whether you really are free to make that choice!

Many people we speak too continuously use the word "trapped" when they're describing the situation they're in that's causing them anxiety or issues - that could be work, relationships, money, debt, addiction, a sense of overwhelm, a lack of direction or purpose, a lack of validation, a big decision to make that they want to get right, imposter syndrome - etc etc, the list goes on and we'll look at them all at some point through these Newsletters.

In the last two weeks, I have personally undergone some coaching that has helped me to ascertain that actually it's the feeling of being "free" to make a choice that is the most important thing I need, right now in my life - the thing that was holding me back though - FEAR! Fear of the consequences.

So, from my list above, I've succumbed to many of those things and the fear of the wrong consequences has caused me to make decisions (because I was free to - just didn't appreciate it), which ironically resulted in (quite often) the very things I feared, actually coming true! The classic "self-fulfilling prophecy". For example, you commit to that big mortgage because you fear not being on the property ladder and being left behind - then you end up trapped because of finances! You change jobs to one with more money because you fear running out or having a lack of money - then you end up trapped in a role or company that doesn't fulfil you - psychologically! Then you share your experiences with others and end up comparing yourself to them, and then fear being judged for making poor decisions!

There are endless examples of where you or others might say we're not free to make a choice - but our purpose for this article is to ask you to narrow down those things that you're imposing on yourself! Mine - was people pleasing! Inadvertently doing everything for everyone, because I feared the consequence of me saying NO - the fear being the end of the attachment, no longer being needed, no longer being loved! It took some real soul searching to conclude this, but in reality the step was a small one! Put "freedom to make a choice" as the key driver for me AND then not fear the consequences - and now I've done that, I'm free to write about it, without fear of what others might think! Oh and even if you are bound by the things in the list above or any others, you're still free! Free to choose how you frame, react or deal with them - see my VLOG on being still and centered!

Try it! If you want help, get in touch www.menable.org